Potty Game: Five Words (Vol. XVI)

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 8:34 am

   any games. I've just read                

Here's the last bit of the story, in case anyone needs to see how the out-of-sequence and repositioned posts (in blue) flow:

Spoiler:
Hermione blushed but looked very pleased. "You can borrow some of my ideas if you like, but don't copy them word for word."

"Thanks!"

The trio returned to the common room.

"Who's your Quidditch team?" Ron asked, unfurling a fresh roll of parchment. (words in blue were originally here.)

"I don't know yet," Hermione said. "I haven't actually seen any games. I've just read...
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story #146

Post  Verity Weasley on Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:10 am

about Quidditch in Hogwarts, A

I figure Hermione hasn't had time (or reason) to read Quidditch Through The Ages yet.

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:52 am

   History."

"I haven't seen a
               

Makes sense, Verity. I was thinking the same thing when you brought up Quidditch earlier.

7/10 of the story done now!


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story #146

Post  Verity Weasley on Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:59 am

game yet either," Harry confided

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 10:06 am

   .

"Ron, which team do you
                ... support?

I can't remember if Ron's support for the Chudley Cannons was mentioned before the troll incident? I still am not near my books. If the Cannons have already been mentioned by Ron earlier, maybe Harry asks which team should they watch play against the Cannons?


EDIT: I know the HP e-books are on sale at the Pottermore shop, but as I don't have a Kindle, and the like, there is no need for me to buy them yet.

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Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 2:16 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : added paragraph break since the speaker changed from Harry to Hermione.)

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story #146

Post  Verity Weasley on Fri Mar 30, 2012 10:44 am

support?" Hermione asked brightly.

"Chudley


Well I have a Kindle, but I haven't been able to buy the ebooks yet. The site won't accept my payment at the moment.

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:05 am

   Cannons. They're not the best                 ... but...

A true fan always finds something positive to say!


Verity Weasley wrote:... I haven't been able to buy the ebooks yet. The site won't accept my payment at the moment.
Sorry to hear that, Verity. But I'm not surprised there's a glitch, to be honest. Since the place reopened on Monday, there have been all sorts of glitches cropping up after the week-long shutdown for "maintenance". The addition of sound does not make up for the new glitches. Good luck to PM when they open the place up to the public in April. The Pottermore Enhanced Experience as they call it (PEE), is decidedly NOT enhanced these days.

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Re: Potty Game: Five Words (Vol. XVI)

Post  Mona on Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:35 am

but they did win the

My 5 words are based on this info from the Lex - "won the league 21 times, the last time being in 1892 (QA7)" Smile

**Falls over laughing** at Pee (Pottermore Enhanced Experience). Very juvenile of me!

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 2:14 pm

    league 21 times, some years                

Mona, I think I have you beat in the juvenile department... in the HP-Facebook groups I belong to, I have taken to counting down each day 'the PEE still SUX'. Today is Day 5, tho' I decided to stop posting the countdown today. I thought I'd take the high road, for a change. Now, if only PM would get the glitches fixed.

Less than 1/5 of this vignette left to write!


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Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:26 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Story #146

Post  Verity Weasley on Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:22 pm

ago."

"Cool," Harry interjected, and


PEE! Sounds like something the would have come up with!

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:29 pm

   added, "if they're good enough                

What PM needs is a in charge of things. She'd get the place running like a Swiss clock in no time!

Our little vignette is almost over... just 35 more words to go!


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Story #146

Post  Verity Weasley on Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:39 pm

to do that, they must

Hi PAH!

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 9:46 pm

   be good!"

"Well, maybe I'll
               

Hi, Verity!

I was thinking 'brilliant' instead of 'good' but wasn't sure. Any ideas?

How do we end this little vignette? Maybe just some narrative about the 3 working together to finish their homework and maybe visit Hagrid? Or something else?


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Story #146

Post  Verity Weasley on Fri Mar 30, 2012 10:54 pm

look them up in the

...library

I think 'brilliant' would work brilliantly in that last sentence. It captures the youthful enthusiasm Harry felt for everything magical at that time, and avoids the repetition of the word 'good'.

I think we should finish this vignette with Hermione reminding Harry and Ron about their homework and helping them. It kind of sets the tone for their future relationship.

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:00 pm

   library. Now, I think both                

Brilliant it is, and Verity, sounds good to me!

Just 15 more words! bounce

The next posts will be on the last page of this thread and then, it's on to Volume XVII in a few days' time!


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Story #146

Post  Verity Weasley on Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:13 pm

of you should get started



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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:18 pm

   . I'll help, if you're stuck."                

And now... for the last 5 words of this story!


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Story #146

Post  Verity Weasley on Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:31 pm

"Thanks Hermione. You're a lifesaver!"

How's that for an ending? There's not enough words to show who is saying this, Harry or Ron, but I don't think it really matters.

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Fri Mar 30, 2012 11:52 pm



I think it's great, Verity! The reader can decide who says it; it's like a little cliffhanger at the end of our vignette.

So, that's a wrap, folks! I declare Story #146, our second 50 posts/250 words story, officially F I N I S H E D ! The finished story and stats will be posted sometime in the next few days, or so.

As is customary, this thread will be locked until the official story and stats are posted.

Stay tuned! Smile

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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume XVI, Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Sun Apr 01, 2012 10:14 am



Potty Five Words: "Friendly Chatter"

Harry, Ron, and Hermione were eating lunch in the Great Hall the day after conquering the troll in the toilet. Hermione was trying to explain the Potions essay Professor Snape had assigned them earlier.

"It's quite straightforward," Hermione said encouragingly.

"Are you joking?" Ron spluttered. "Describing the different effects of fluxweed and Glumbumble fluid on the whatchamacallit andβ€”"

"I can show you my answer," Hermione offered, "and then it might make sense." She rolled her eyes. "Honestly, you two."

Harry grinned. "Thanks Hermione. Snape seems to think my work's rubbish no matter what, but it'd be helpful to see what a really good potions essay looks like."

Hermione blushed but looked very pleased. "You can borrow some of my ideas if you like, but don't copy them word for word."

"Thanks!"

The trio returned to the common room.

"Who's your Quidditch team?" Ron asked, unfurling a fresh roll of parchment.

"I don't know yet," Hermione said. "I haven't actually seen any games. I've just read about Quidditch in Hogwarts, A History."

"I haven't seen a game yet either," Harry confided.

"Ron, which team do you support?" Hermione asked brightly.

"Chudley Cannons. They're not the best but they did win the league 21 times, some years ago."

"Cool," Harry interjected, and added, "if they're good enough to do that, they must be brilliant!"

"Well, maybe I'll look them up in the library. Now, I think both of you should get started. I'll help, if you're stuck."

"Thanks Hermione. You're a lifesaver!"





 * Five Words – Volume 16 Index * 

 * Five Words - Volumes Index * 

 * Five Words - Main Archives * 
 * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * 

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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume XVI, Story #146 stats

Post  Potteraholic on Sun Apr 01, 2012 10:17 am



Statistics for Story 146
ordered by first contribution to the story

  User  
  # of  
  Submissions  
  Potteraholic   23  
  Verity Weasley     20  
  Mona     7  
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times.

Total Submissions: 50
Total Words: 250
Last Submission Date:Mar 30, 2012 10:31 pm (EST). (Verity Weasley)
Total Time to Create Story: 5 days, 9 hours, 22 minutes





 * Five Words – Volume 16 Index * 

 * Five Words - Main Archives * 
 * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * 

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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume XVI, Story #146 post-story comments

Post  Potteraholic on Sun Apr 01, 2012 10:18 am



Post-Story Comments for Story #146, Volume XVI,
Potty Five Words: "Friendly Chatter"

This story was written from March 25, 2012 to March 30, 2012. Three writers contributed to the story, which is 250 words long. --- of the three writers posted feedback. All times listed are EST.

- name, m/d/, 2012 -:-- -m:

- name, m/d/, 2012 -:-- -m:

- name, m/d/, 2012 -:-- -m:

- name, m/d/, 2012 -:-- -m:

- name, m/d/, 2012 -:-- -m:





 * Five Words – Volume 16 Index * 

 * Five Words - Volumes Index * 

 * Five Words - Main Archives * 
 * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * 

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Story #146

Post  Potteraholic on Sun Apr 01, 2012 10:32 am



Story #146, our second 50 posts/250 words tale, is up! I think it turned out quite well. We managed to fit in a fair amount of canon details into a short vignette: Harry and Ron's difficulties with Potions class, Hermione's love of reading, esp. of Hogwarts, a History, and Ron's devotion to the Chudley Cannons. The trouble was, with limited words, it was sometimes hard to work in dialogue that fit the characters, while being succinct at the same time. (Oh, and there was that time when I forgot where the story was set, but thanks to Mona's vigilance and words, and just moving some words a bit forward in the story, it all worked out in the end.) All in all, I think we wrote a charming little anecdote.

Now, as it's Fred and George's birthday today, and we are due to start a new story and a new thread, what better way to do so, I say, then a story about our favorite twins? However, I am not ready to start the new story right now, as it means I have to start a new thread, and I don't have time at the moment to do the formatting and links needed.

My niece is playing in the local Y's basketball play-offs today, and her team has a good chance of winning the whole thing! Their team t-shirt is purple, so my niece has asked me to wear something purple in support. I have a lilac shirt. She has said that is okay. I will put up the new thread and story start later, when I get back home. Verity, I know you will be asleep by then (I saw that your were online a few minutes ago, when I started posting the story), but I will post an announcement of this new F & G story in the Chat thread, in honor of the twins' birthday. So you may wake up to find some more posts after my starting one, that gets the story going. *fingers crossed*

Until then, folks, feel free to post your post-story comments and end-of-thread thoughts here.

Stay tuned!

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Re: Potty Game: Five Words (Vol. XVI)

Post  Mona on Mon Apr 02, 2012 6:35 am

Good luck to your neice, PAH! Like a Star @ heaven

I liked the little sketch. It's nice to read more conversations between our trio , even if we have to write it ourselves! We did a good job, I think.

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Re: Potty Game: Five Words (Vol. XVI)

Post  Verity Weasley on Mon Apr 02, 2012 6:44 am

Yes, it was a sweet little story. It was quite a challenge to write dialogue for the trio at this stage of their relationship. JKR really just skipped the whole 'getting to know you' part, but I think we did a good job. This felt like more of a vignette than the first one, probably because it was mostly dialogue, but it felt pretty authentic.


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Re: Potty Game: Five Words (Vol. XVI)

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