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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #95
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:15 pm
This story was first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 10, 2008 9:38 am (#2119 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Snape's portrait was hung in the Headmaster's office at Hogwarts next to the portrait of the headmaster that preceded him. Albus Dumbledore opened his eyes and said, "How nice to see you here at last! Your hasty exit may have delayed this happy moment a while until Harry ensured you a place here, finally. It's an honor that you have long deserved."
Snape was temporarily dumbfounded. He stared at his mentor in disbelief and sneered. "I can't believe this," he said bitterly. "After everything that happened, I still end up in Potter's debt."
"Now Severus, don't be so bitter. It's over, now, and Harry was only playing his part, the same as you. We have a duty—"
Snape raised his dark eyebrows towards the ceiling and shook his head, "I'm tired. I thought I'd be having a quiet and restful Afterlife."
He sounded so sad that Dumbledore suggested they go out. "Perhaps the painting of the landscape with trees, for a change of scenery, would help you to relax a bit. I find it very soothing."
Snape nodded and silently followed Dumbledore into the bucolic scene. Smiling serenely, Dumbledore sat down comfortably on the grass and said, "There's nothing better than a talk between friends. Is there, my dear Severus?"
"Friends?" This was more than Snape could bear. "You consider me a friend, Albus?" he asked with bitterness. "I felt more like a pawn in your game than a friend! You kept me in the dark, never trusting me with all the facts!"
Dumbledore's expression was inscrutable. He spread his fingers under his chin, tips together. He seemed to be lost in thought, but started speaking softly. "Forgive me, Severus. That was not my intention. I thought it would be safer for you, since Voldemort is such an accomplished Legilimens. I didn't want to risk him finding out that you were my most important ally and you were deliberately acting on my orders."
Snape hesitated. "I knew on whose orders, Professor. But your motives? Ambiguous… though the instructions were clear and my Occlumency skills were the best," he said.
"But I had to think of every possibility, Severus. I did not want to take any unnecessary risks—"
"But I had to know what I was doing!" Snape exclaimed. "You could not think my heart was so hard that I wouldn't want to do what was right."
Before Dumbledore could answer, Phineas Nigellus appeared from behind a tree. "There you are, Dumbledore. I've been searching every portrait in the castle looking for you. Oh!" he smiled. "Professor Snape. I didn't know you were here, finally. I rather missed talking to you, I must say. The company of a Slytherin isn't a common pleasure in this venerable society of commoners and Muggle-borns. It's refreshing beyond measure."
"Yes, Phineas," Dumbledore said quietly, "But what did you need to tell me? I'm sure it will be interesting," finished Dumbledore, leaning back against the trunk of a tree, serenely.
Phineas seemed reluctant to put forward his message, but the look of annoyance on Dumbledore's face made him go on.
"Well, I just thought you should know the most extraordinary piece of news I've heard these past few days." He paused for a second. "In fact it concerns Harry Potter. He dropped by the Headmaster's office and... hang on, another Gryffindor... Longbottom... yes, he was with him." Snape knew the answers he wanted to hear would now have to wait. Of course Potter and Longbottom were more important. They had always been, with good reason, he realized.
He was watching the two wizards carefully. Phineas continued, "Potter came to tell the Headmaster that he and Longbottom were pleased to announce something of greatest importance, not only to Hogwarts, but the wizarding community in general."
Snape said, "What is this immensely important piece of news?"
Phineas smirked and said, "It might interest you to know that it concerns you too, Headmaster Snape."
Snape looked flummoxed. "Me? How does it concern me now I'm dead? I just want to get answers to a few simple little questions so that I can continue my Afterlife in peace and quiet. Is there anything else I can—"
"Phineas, perhaps you should just let us all know what's so important. Sorry, Severus, for interrupting you."
"Headmaster Snape has been posthumously awarded an Order of Merlin." Snape looked stunned. Dumbledore, on the other hand, looked like he'd been expecting the news. He gave a satisfied smile.
"Congratulations, Severus!" he said and put his hand on Snape's shoulder and gave him a friendly, almost fatherly pat. Dumbledore said, "I had hoped that the Ministry would see sense after Harry told them what you have done."
Snape's dark eyes glittered with fury. "Told them?" he spat. "Hadn't everyone heard enough already when he shouted it out in front of hundreds of spectators?"
This was not the reaction Dumbledore had hoped for and he asked, "Severus, what's the matter with you? Why can't you accept the good things and forget about the bad ones? You and Harry worked tirelessly to defeat Voldemort. I think you should talk to him."
"Talk to him?" Snape, asked. "I'd rather not."
"Why?" Dumbledore asked. "I don't think he would refuse the opportunity to speak with you."
There was a moment's silence, broken by Phineas' impatient voice. "A member of Slytherin House has been awarded an Order of Merlin," he said, "and it's high time that the wizarding world acknowledged the contribution of this house to our victory. The Dead Heads are not especially accustomed to seeing one of us honored, smug, foolhardy Gryffindors as most of them are. Hogwarts, too, needs to realize that our House shares both the sacrifice and the glory of everyone involved in the struggle."
Dumbledore nodded. "Yes, Severus, it is true what Phineas says. You are a Hogwarts Headmaster and deserve our community's respect. Phineas, could you possibly go and tell the other Headmasters that we need a little time before the festivities can start? We can't have a party without them." Phineas nodded and left.
Snape glared at Dumbledore and asked, "Festivities? What sort of festivities? What are you talking about when I don't want the Order of Merlin in the first place at all!"
"A welcoming party, of course!"
"Didn't you hear me, Headmaster? I don't want the Order—"
"Yes," Dumbledore sighed. "I heard you. Why?"
Snape looked him squarely in the eye and said, "I am dead. When I was alive, my wishes never came true. Now I'd like to think that they would be respected when I stated them so plainly." He slowly turned away from Dumbledore and the castle.
"Severus, don't you think it's time to move on from past wrongs and misunderstandings? Holding on to your grudges isn't such a healthy thing to do. You won't ever enjoy the true benefits of being dead if you continue to dwell on the past. This bitterness must be released. You deserve this—"
"How would you feel if everything you had ever done was hung out like dirty washing for the whole world to see?"
Dumbledore gave a slight chuckle and said, "Rita Skeeter has shared all the gossip on me with the wizarding world. Remember her book? Most of it was lies and innuendo. You had been leading a double life for so long you have forgotten that everyone—"
"Everyone what?" Snape interrupted. "Everyone spends a life trying to atone for the misdeeds that they committed when they were young and stupid?"
Dumbledore said, "You are older and wiser now and eternity is a very long time. Too long to be unhappy. You had a terrible time! You sacrificed more than most. But you have forgotten that you don't need to keep secrets anymore. The truth is nothing to be ashamed of."
In the corridor where the landscape hung, the sound of approaching footsteps could be heard. Three students were running and chattering loudly to each other, Peeves, spying them, started to chase them gleefully. Dumbledore explained, "This cheerful scene wouldn't be happening now if it hadn't been for you." He paused. "It's with good reason you should be proud that you helped achieve that. Perhaps you might even feel happy!"
Snape nodded, begrudgingly. "I'm beginning to see what you mean. I'm not used to being open about my role in changing the wizarding world for the better. I need time to get used to it."
Snape's eyes began to shine brightly. Dumbledore beamed. "Good start, to begin with, at least." The two men exchanged a look of understanding where each did not need Legilimency to read the other's thoughts. Snape forced something approaching a smile on his face. Dumbledore seized his chance and got to his feet. "Let's go, Severus! The Drunk Monks will have some butterbeers waiting for us!"
Together they strolled out of the landscape painting and into the painting of the drunk monks. A symphony of hiccups greeted them and it appeared as if the monks had started the party early. Dumbledore smiled. "Not a bad place to spend eternity, Severus." He indicated a bottle of Elf-made wine that had escaped the attention of the monks.
A few minutes later, after pouring a glass for himself and the latest recipient of the Order of Merlin, he raised his glass, looked earnestly at the Dead Heads who had just arrived and were now looking expectantly at Snape. "To our most esteemed colleague," Dumbledore began, "who has now joined our society as one of its most deserved members, and holder of the Order of Merlin, First Class, for uncompromising bravery and unwavering loyalty in the face of great danger. May he find true friendship and happiness in the long future ahead and may Hogwarts be his real home for ever."
The Headmasters and Headmistresses all raised their glasses in honor of their youngest colleague. Together they chorused, "To Severus!"
Beyond them all, Snape thought he could see in his mind's eye the ethereal figure of the red-haired woman he had always longed to protect but had failed. He nodded to her and thought, I have saved your son. Can you forgive me now?
She smiled and said, "Yes."
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Dumbledore and Snape: A Tale from the Afterlife"
Snape's portrait was hung in the Headmaster's office at Hogwarts next to the portrait of the headmaster that preceded him. Albus Dumbledore opened his eyes and said, "How nice to see you here at last! Your hasty exit may have delayed this happy moment a while until Harry ensured you a place here, finally. It's an honor that you have long deserved."
Snape was temporarily dumbfounded. He stared at his mentor in disbelief and sneered. "I can't believe this," he said bitterly. "After everything that happened, I still end up in Potter's debt."
"Now Severus, don't be so bitter. It's over, now, and Harry was only playing his part, the same as you. We have a duty—"
Snape raised his dark eyebrows towards the ceiling and shook his head, "I'm tired. I thought I'd be having a quiet and restful Afterlife."
He sounded so sad that Dumbledore suggested they go out. "Perhaps the painting of the landscape with trees, for a change of scenery, would help you to relax a bit. I find it very soothing."
Snape nodded and silently followed Dumbledore into the bucolic scene. Smiling serenely, Dumbledore sat down comfortably on the grass and said, "There's nothing better than a talk between friends. Is there, my dear Severus?"
"Friends?" This was more than Snape could bear. "You consider me a friend, Albus?" he asked with bitterness. "I felt more like a pawn in your game than a friend! You kept me in the dark, never trusting me with all the facts!"
Dumbledore's expression was inscrutable. He spread his fingers under his chin, tips together. He seemed to be lost in thought, but started speaking softly. "Forgive me, Severus. That was not my intention. I thought it would be safer for you, since Voldemort is such an accomplished Legilimens. I didn't want to risk him finding out that you were my most important ally and you were deliberately acting on my orders."
Snape hesitated. "I knew on whose orders, Professor. But your motives? Ambiguous… though the instructions were clear and my Occlumency skills were the best," he said.
"But I had to think of every possibility, Severus. I did not want to take any unnecessary risks—"
"But I had to know what I was doing!" Snape exclaimed. "You could not think my heart was so hard that I wouldn't want to do what was right."
Before Dumbledore could answer, Phineas Nigellus appeared from behind a tree. "There you are, Dumbledore. I've been searching every portrait in the castle looking for you. Oh!" he smiled. "Professor Snape. I didn't know you were here, finally. I rather missed talking to you, I must say. The company of a Slytherin isn't a common pleasure in this venerable society of commoners and Muggle-borns. It's refreshing beyond measure."
"Yes, Phineas," Dumbledore said quietly, "But what did you need to tell me? I'm sure it will be interesting," finished Dumbledore, leaning back against the trunk of a tree, serenely.
Phineas seemed reluctant to put forward his message, but the look of annoyance on Dumbledore's face made him go on.
"Well, I just thought you should know the most extraordinary piece of news I've heard these past few days." He paused for a second. "In fact it concerns Harry Potter. He dropped by the Headmaster's office and... hang on, another Gryffindor... Longbottom... yes, he was with him." Snape knew the answers he wanted to hear would now have to wait. Of course Potter and Longbottom were more important. They had always been, with good reason, he realized.
He was watching the two wizards carefully. Phineas continued, "Potter came to tell the Headmaster that he and Longbottom were pleased to announce something of greatest importance, not only to Hogwarts, but the wizarding community in general."
Snape said, "What is this immensely important piece of news?"
Phineas smirked and said, "It might interest you to know that it concerns you too, Headmaster Snape."
Snape looked flummoxed. "Me? How does it concern me now I'm dead? I just want to get answers to a few simple little questions so that I can continue my Afterlife in peace and quiet. Is there anything else I can—"
"Phineas, perhaps you should just let us all know what's so important. Sorry, Severus, for interrupting you."
"Headmaster Snape has been posthumously awarded an Order of Merlin." Snape looked stunned. Dumbledore, on the other hand, looked like he'd been expecting the news. He gave a satisfied smile.
"Congratulations, Severus!" he said and put his hand on Snape's shoulder and gave him a friendly, almost fatherly pat. Dumbledore said, "I had hoped that the Ministry would see sense after Harry told them what you have done."
Snape's dark eyes glittered with fury. "Told them?" he spat. "Hadn't everyone heard enough already when he shouted it out in front of hundreds of spectators?"
This was not the reaction Dumbledore had hoped for and he asked, "Severus, what's the matter with you? Why can't you accept the good things and forget about the bad ones? You and Harry worked tirelessly to defeat Voldemort. I think you should talk to him."
"Talk to him?" Snape, asked. "I'd rather not."
"Why?" Dumbledore asked. "I don't think he would refuse the opportunity to speak with you."
There was a moment's silence, broken by Phineas' impatient voice. "A member of Slytherin House has been awarded an Order of Merlin," he said, "and it's high time that the wizarding world acknowledged the contribution of this house to our victory. The Dead Heads are not especially accustomed to seeing one of us honored, smug, foolhardy Gryffindors as most of them are. Hogwarts, too, needs to realize that our House shares both the sacrifice and the glory of everyone involved in the struggle."
Dumbledore nodded. "Yes, Severus, it is true what Phineas says. You are a Hogwarts Headmaster and deserve our community's respect. Phineas, could you possibly go and tell the other Headmasters that we need a little time before the festivities can start? We can't have a party without them." Phineas nodded and left.
Snape glared at Dumbledore and asked, "Festivities? What sort of festivities? What are you talking about when I don't want the Order of Merlin in the first place at all!"
"A welcoming party, of course!"
"Didn't you hear me, Headmaster? I don't want the Order—"
"Yes," Dumbledore sighed. "I heard you. Why?"
Snape looked him squarely in the eye and said, "I am dead. When I was alive, my wishes never came true. Now I'd like to think that they would be respected when I stated them so plainly." He slowly turned away from Dumbledore and the castle.
"Severus, don't you think it's time to move on from past wrongs and misunderstandings? Holding on to your grudges isn't such a healthy thing to do. You won't ever enjoy the true benefits of being dead if you continue to dwell on the past. This bitterness must be released. You deserve this—"
"How would you feel if everything you had ever done was hung out like dirty washing for the whole world to see?"
Dumbledore gave a slight chuckle and said, "Rita Skeeter has shared all the gossip on me with the wizarding world. Remember her book? Most of it was lies and innuendo. You had been leading a double life for so long you have forgotten that everyone—"
"Everyone what?" Snape interrupted. "Everyone spends a life trying to atone for the misdeeds that they committed when they were young and stupid?"
Dumbledore said, "You are older and wiser now and eternity is a very long time. Too long to be unhappy. You had a terrible time! You sacrificed more than most. But you have forgotten that you don't need to keep secrets anymore. The truth is nothing to be ashamed of."
In the corridor where the landscape hung, the sound of approaching footsteps could be heard. Three students were running and chattering loudly to each other, Peeves, spying them, started to chase them gleefully. Dumbledore explained, "This cheerful scene wouldn't be happening now if it hadn't been for you." He paused. "It's with good reason you should be proud that you helped achieve that. Perhaps you might even feel happy!"
Snape nodded, begrudgingly. "I'm beginning to see what you mean. I'm not used to being open about my role in changing the wizarding world for the better. I need time to get used to it."
Snape's eyes began to shine brightly. Dumbledore beamed. "Good start, to begin with, at least." The two men exchanged a look of understanding where each did not need Legilimency to read the other's thoughts. Snape forced something approaching a smile on his face. Dumbledore seized his chance and got to his feet. "Let's go, Severus! The Drunk Monks will have some butterbeers waiting for us!"
Together they strolled out of the landscape painting and into the painting of the drunk monks. A symphony of hiccups greeted them and it appeared as if the monks had started the party early. Dumbledore smiled. "Not a bad place to spend eternity, Severus." He indicated a bottle of Elf-made wine that had escaped the attention of the monks.
A few minutes later, after pouring a glass for himself and the latest recipient of the Order of Merlin, he raised his glass, looked earnestly at the Dead Heads who had just arrived and were now looking expectantly at Snape. "To our most esteemed colleague," Dumbledore began, "who has now joined our society as one of its most deserved members, and holder of the Order of Merlin, First Class, for uncompromising bravery and unwavering loyalty in the face of great danger. May he find true friendship and happiness in the long future ahead and may Hogwarts be his real home for ever."
The Headmasters and Headmistresses all raised their glasses in honor of their youngest colleague. Together they chorused, "To Severus!"
Beyond them all, Snape thought he could see in his mind's eye the ethereal figure of the red-haired woman he had always longed to protect but had failed. He nodded to her and thought, I have saved your son. Can you forgive me now?
She smiled and said, "Yes."
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:28 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #95 stats and post-story comments
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:17 pm
These stats were first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 10, 2008 9:51 am (#2120 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 95
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 340
Total Words: 1700
Last Submission Date: #2117, November 8, 2008, 12:29 PM (legolas returns)
Total Time to Create Story: 3 days, 15 hours, 0 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story 95, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Dumbledore and Snape: A Tale from the Afterlife"
This story was posted on November 10, 2008. Nine writers contributed to the story, which is 1,700 words long. Five of the nine writers posted feedback.
Potteraholic, Nov 10, 2008 9:58 am: The 95th story is up! And it clocks in at exactly 1,700 words! I will forgo post-story comments about the story itself because there are some procedural items I need to address and this post will be long enough as it is!
1) When changing speakers, please include a paragraph break by pressing ENTER/RETURN 2x or by typing this HTML code 2x —> <*br> (no*). Including paragraph breaks doesn't affect compiling all that much, but it think will help to avoid confusion in the future, while we write the story, about who's speaking.
2) Please include apostrophes in contractions. Some common contractions are: don't, can't, isn't, didn't, I'm, I've, there's, we're, they're, etc.
3) When using ending punctuation in dialog, it looks like this: ".. I know." or "... I know?" or "... I know!" (without a speaker following the dialog)
or "... I know," Harry said. (use a comma instead of a period/full stop with a speaker connected to the dialog).
Remembering these last 2 items will help streamline the compiling process. Thanks for your help!
Something else I'd like to mention is a reminder that Five Words is a creative writing game where a group of writers respond and react to each other's ideas in an improvisational manner. While we have all ideas about how stories should progress, we need to refrain from outlining story details in the beginning as it detracts from the creativity of others. For folks who have particular stories they are eager to tell, I suggest the following:
1) Start a new thread in the FFF for your story. If you email Kip, he can give you detailed instructions on how to start your own fanfic thread. In fact, someone posted a question about this recently in the FFF's Questions for the Host thread, followed by Kip's response. Why not take a look?
2) Check the 'Writing Contest' thread, also on the FFF, to see if there's a topic that grabs your fancy. Five Worders Anna L. Black and Swedish Short-Snout have both posted stories there recently. Congrats to both of them!
3) Since folks seem to be interested in telling specific stories about Severus Snape, I encourage you to post these stories over on the Main Forum's ‘Snape Epilogue' thread, since that thread was created for just that purpose; this one was not.
I have mentioned these ideas about trying not to specify a story's plot prior to the writing of this story; please excuse me for not creating links to the various places where I posted these suggestions before. Searching for these posts would take time that I do not have at the moment.
- Dryleaves, Nov 10, 2008 10:23 am: I have not read the last story properly yet so I won't give any comments, but I liked the idea of writing about portraits. As for your advice, PAH, I just want to ask a question for clarification and to avoid later misunderstandings: if someone in the future would like to start a story featuring the character Severus Snape and is completely open to other people's suggestions and ideas and flexible about their own and able to empty their mind of all emotion, would it be OK? I think flexibility is very important as we are many writers here. I think it is OK to give suggestions as long as others are free to ignore them.
- Potteraholic, Nov 10, 2008 10:45 am: Dryleaves, in answer to your questions re: stories about Snape, 1) yes, flexibility is strongly encouraged and 2) I think we need to write about a range of characters in these stories. We have already had 2 stories about Snape in this volume. That seems to be a good number of stories about any one character for any volume, I should think. That includes a 'Seamus and Dean' tale, a 'Minnie and Auggie' adventure, etc. Does that help?
- Dryleaves, Nov 10, 2008 1:53 pm: Maybe something should be said about the previous story. I really liked the idea, then I guess it's next to mission impossible to make Snape happy in 1700 words. I liked the appearance of Phineas Nigellus (I usually do and to tell the truth I was a little sorry when he was sent away.) Maybe the final story was a bit predictable. There are many alternative turns it could have taken, but of course that's the way it always is. Maybe I'll end up writing fan fiction after all...
- Julia H., Nov 10, 2008 3:10 pm: Maybe the final story was a bit predictable. There are many alternative turns it could have taken, but of course that's the way it always is. (Dryleaves)
Now I can't help thinking about those alternative turns:
1) Draco Malfoy stealing Snape's portrait and selling it to the British Museum.
2) Instead of the Order of Merlin, Snape is presented with a portrait of Lily Evans (without any Potters) that he can visit any time from now on because portraits can move freely about within Hogwarts, visiting each other. (Happy Ending.)
3) Snape walks about Hogwarts and discovers a totally forgotten painting of a small cottage hanging near his old office and classroom downstairs and moves in, hoping it will be a safe refuge whenever he is in a mood that he needs one.
- Dryleaves, Nov 10, 2008 3:14 pm: Good brainstorming, Julia! That is exactly what I mean!
- Julia H., Nov 10, 2008 3:25 pm: Thanks, Dryleaves!
But once in an eternity, even Snape can get some praise and appreciation - even if it is boring and he does not know what to do with it.
- Dryleaves, Nov 10, 2008 3:32 pm: Of course he can, but there are several options there too...
- Julia H., Nov 10, 2008 3:41 pm: Well, yes, I suppose... (Perhaps he would prefer the Lily Evans portrait option...)
- Verity Weasley, Nov 10, 2008 8:19 pm: Dryleaves, I think you're right about the last story. Snape is a fantastic character, amazingly complex. But whenever he shows up in a story on Five Words, things tend to get very soppy, very quickly!
- PeskyPixie, Nov 23, 2008 2:20 am: I've just read Dumbledore and Snape: A Tale from the Afterlife. It's really good.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 95
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| legolas returns | 62 |
| azi | 7 |
| Julia H. | 83 |
| Potteraholic | 86 |
| Verity Weasley | 51 |
| Quinn Crockett | 2 |
| PatPat | 4 |
| Anna L. Black | 9 |
| Dryleaves | 36 |
Total Submissions: 340
Total Words: 1700
Last Submission Date: #2117, November 8, 2008, 12:29 PM (legolas returns)
Total Time to Create Story: 3 days, 15 hours, 0 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story 95, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Dumbledore and Snape: A Tale from the Afterlife"
This story was posted on November 10, 2008. Nine writers contributed to the story, which is 1,700 words long. Five of the nine writers posted feedback.
Potteraholic, Nov 10, 2008 9:58 am: The 95th story is up! And it clocks in at exactly 1,700 words! I will forgo post-story comments about the story itself because there are some procedural items I need to address and this post will be long enough as it is!
1) When changing speakers, please include a paragraph break by pressing ENTER/RETURN 2x or by typing this HTML code 2x —> <*br> (no*). Including paragraph breaks doesn't affect compiling all that much, but it think will help to avoid confusion in the future, while we write the story, about who's speaking.
2) Please include apostrophes in contractions. Some common contractions are: don't, can't, isn't, didn't, I'm, I've, there's, we're, they're, etc.
3) When using ending punctuation in dialog, it looks like this: ".. I know." or "... I know?" or "... I know!" (without a speaker following the dialog)
or "... I know," Harry said. (use a comma instead of a period/full stop with a speaker connected to the dialog).
Remembering these last 2 items will help streamline the compiling process. Thanks for your help!
Something else I'd like to mention is a reminder that Five Words is a creative writing game where a group of writers respond and react to each other's ideas in an improvisational manner. While we have all ideas about how stories should progress, we need to refrain from outlining story details in the beginning as it detracts from the creativity of others. For folks who have particular stories they are eager to tell, I suggest the following:
1) Start a new thread in the FFF for your story. If you email Kip, he can give you detailed instructions on how to start your own fanfic thread. In fact, someone posted a question about this recently in the FFF's Questions for the Host thread, followed by Kip's response. Why not take a look?
2) Check the 'Writing Contest' thread, also on the FFF, to see if there's a topic that grabs your fancy. Five Worders Anna L. Black and Swedish Short-Snout have both posted stories there recently. Congrats to both of them!
3) Since folks seem to be interested in telling specific stories about Severus Snape, I encourage you to post these stories over on the Main Forum's ‘Snape Epilogue' thread, since that thread was created for just that purpose; this one was not.
I have mentioned these ideas about trying not to specify a story's plot prior to the writing of this story; please excuse me for not creating links to the various places where I posted these suggestions before. Searching for these posts would take time that I do not have at the moment.
- Dryleaves, Nov 10, 2008 10:23 am: I have not read the last story properly yet so I won't give any comments, but I liked the idea of writing about portraits. As for your advice, PAH, I just want to ask a question for clarification and to avoid later misunderstandings: if someone in the future would like to start a story featuring the character Severus Snape and is completely open to other people's suggestions and ideas and flexible about their own and able to empty their mind of all emotion, would it be OK? I think flexibility is very important as we are many writers here. I think it is OK to give suggestions as long as others are free to ignore them.
- Potteraholic, Nov 10, 2008 10:45 am: Dryleaves, in answer to your questions re: stories about Snape, 1) yes, flexibility is strongly encouraged and 2) I think we need to write about a range of characters in these stories. We have already had 2 stories about Snape in this volume. That seems to be a good number of stories about any one character for any volume, I should think. That includes a 'Seamus and Dean' tale, a 'Minnie and Auggie' adventure, etc. Does that help?
- Dryleaves, Nov 10, 2008 1:53 pm: Maybe something should be said about the previous story. I really liked the idea, then I guess it's next to mission impossible to make Snape happy in 1700 words. I liked the appearance of Phineas Nigellus (I usually do and to tell the truth I was a little sorry when he was sent away.) Maybe the final story was a bit predictable. There are many alternative turns it could have taken, but of course that's the way it always is. Maybe I'll end up writing fan fiction after all...
- Julia H., Nov 10, 2008 3:10 pm: Maybe the final story was a bit predictable. There are many alternative turns it could have taken, but of course that's the way it always is. (Dryleaves)
Now I can't help thinking about those alternative turns:
1) Draco Malfoy stealing Snape's portrait and selling it to the British Museum.
2) Instead of the Order of Merlin, Snape is presented with a portrait of Lily Evans (without any Potters) that he can visit any time from now on because portraits can move freely about within Hogwarts, visiting each other. (Happy Ending.)
3) Snape walks about Hogwarts and discovers a totally forgotten painting of a small cottage hanging near his old office and classroom downstairs and moves in, hoping it will be a safe refuge whenever he is in a mood that he needs one.
- Dryleaves, Nov 10, 2008 3:14 pm: Good brainstorming, Julia! That is exactly what I mean!
- Julia H., Nov 10, 2008 3:25 pm: Thanks, Dryleaves!
But once in an eternity, even Snape can get some praise and appreciation - even if it is boring and he does not know what to do with it.
- Dryleaves, Nov 10, 2008 3:32 pm: Of course he can, but there are several options there too...
- Julia H., Nov 10, 2008 3:41 pm: Well, yes, I suppose... (Perhaps he would prefer the Lily Evans portrait option...)
- Verity Weasley, Nov 10, 2008 8:19 pm: Dryleaves, I think you're right about the last story. Snape is a fantastic character, amazingly complex. But whenever he shows up in a story on Five Words, things tend to get very soppy, very quickly!
- PeskyPixie, Nov 23, 2008 2:20 am: I've just read Dumbledore and Snape: A Tale from the Afterlife. It's really good.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:05 pm; edited 2 times in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #96
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:18 pm
This story was first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 21, 2008 3:28 am (#2419 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Pomona Sprout waited. Platform 9 ¾ was seething with activity. Wizards and witches were saying goodbye to their children. Pomona's parents were trying to smile, but her mother was failing miserably, as big tears streaked her cheeks. Her father was having as bad a time of it, but was stoically heaving her heavy trunk onto the train.
"My dear daughter, I can't believe you're going to Hogwarts!"
"You can call me Pommie, Father!" Pomona said.
She looked small beside the immense train and her parents wondered how she would be able to hold her own in such a big place like Hogwarts.
The train whistle sounded and Pomona hurried to get on the train in time. Her parents waved to her as the Hogwarts Express slowly started to move and she waved back to them. When she could not see them anymore, she thought it was time to look for a compartment. She looked round timidly, wishing there was somebody familiar around that she could talk to.
She wandered down the corridor, looking for a place where she could read her book. She finally found a spot that she liked. It was near the back, and there were several other nervous looking students there. Maybe they're first-years, too, she thought. She sat in the seat nearest the door, and began rummaging through her pockets for her book. After taking out some wilting Flitterbloom leaves, and an old packet of Snapdragon seeds, she pulled out her pocket version of Plants for all Reasons by Violet Thistler.
"I've got a big sister at Hogwarts who's reading that same book!" exclaimed a small blond-haired girl, rising from her seat and plonking herself down next to Pomona. "It's her favorite book," she added, "and she sometimes takes me on nature walks near the village where we live. We look for plants and we pick berries and mushrooms."
Pomona looked at her and smiled. "I'm Pomona Sprout. Pleased to meet you."
"My name is Priscilla. Priscilla Turnip. It's my first time at Hogwarts and I'm ever so excited about it. Have you been there before?"
Pomona shook her head. "No, it's my first year. I wonder which House I'll be sorted into?" Pomona's mother was a Ravenclaw and her father, a Gryffindor, and both were very fond of their respective Houses.
"I hope I'm in the same House as my sister," Priscilla said. "She's in Hufflepuff and they have midnight feasts all the time. I love eating loads of chocolate and jam tarts. If I'm in Hufflepuff, I'll spend more time eating than working, probably!"
Priscilla chuckled and Pomona said, "I don't know what House I want to be in. It doesn't really matter. I just worry about disappointing one of my parents. They were in different Houses, so if I get sorted into either Ravenclaw or Gryffindor, then one of them will be happy, but the other won't." She looked sad.
Priscilla looked sympathetic. "You could be sorted into Hufflepuff!" she exclaimed excitedly. "Then neither of your parents would be offended and we can be friends!"
Pomona brightened when she heard that someone wanted to be her friend. "That would be really cool," Pomona nodded. "I wonder... there's also Slytherin House... But both my parents didn't seem to like it."
One of the boys opposite looked up quickly and said, "Slytherin's the House where all the great wizards of importance and cunning come from. That's the House all my family belonged to. And where I want to be sorted as well." He gave Pomona a long, cold stare. "Your name isn't one I know. Are you a pure-blood?"
Pomona regarded him with increasing distaste. "What difference does that make?" she demanded. And who are you, anyway?"
The boy cast a disdainful eye in return. "You would not ask that if you were a pure-blood. My family is well-known and very distinguished."
"Really?" Pomona said. "I'm sure that's true, but I’ve never seen you before. And anyway, whatever your name is, I don't think you're very nice!"
Pomona glowered at the boy and he glowered back. They were both angry but a cheerful voice made them both stop glaring at each other momentarily.
"Abraxas! Pomona! You two don't want to start quarrelling—"
"Abraxas! That's your name?" Pomona sniggered. "Sounds like a hippogriff or a dragon's name."
"Pomona? Sounds like that greasy stuff people put in their hair..."
"What about my name?" Priscilla chuckled.
"Your name's lovely," Pomona began, but Abraxas interrupted.
"Priscilla? Priscilla's fine, I suppose, but Turnip isn't exactly one of the oldest family names around, is it?"
"In fact it is," teased Priscilla, "We just don't shout it from the rooftops like you do!"
Abraxas looked livid. "Malfoys do no such thing!" he raged.
Priscilla laughed, "Don't get your knickers in a knot. How about a friendly game of Exploding Snap?"
Abraxas looked stunned at first, but then decided that it couldn't hurt. He turned to the boy sitting next to him. "Would you like to play too? It's better with four players, right Alistair?"
The boy shrugged. "I suppose so, but you get very angry if you're not winning, and that'll be more difficult with four players." The boy joined them anyway and Priscilla began laying out the cards.
Alistair Bones secretly hoped that Abraxas wouldn't win. He was really tired of hearing his bragging. A few minutes later the snack trolley witch came by and both boys jumped up. "Perfect timing!" said Alistair gleefully. "I could do with some pumpkin juice and a couple of Cauldron Cakes. I'm famished."
Loaded with goodies, he carefully returned to his seat while Abraxas stayed behind, changing his mind about what to buy. When he finally had enough sweets to feed an army, he turned to the two girls, a genuine smile on his face and asked, "Would you like a Chocolate Frog, Pomona? Priscilla?" He held one out, and Pomona took it, hesitantly.
"Er... thank you. I wonder whose card I got this time? I've been collecting them for three years, never finding a 'Musidora Barkwith'."
Abraxas looked up from his pile of sweets in surprise. "That's what I'm looking for, too!"
"Really?" Pomona asked. She was surprised to find something they had in common.
"My collection has about 500 cards," said Abraxas, "but 'Musidora' is really elusive!"
There was a brief silence while everyone unwrapped their frogs. "Phyllida Spore!" Pomona exclaimed, "The author of One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi!" She looked a bit disappointed. "I already have twelve of those!" she whined. "Besides, what's so special about her?"
"She's a great herbologist, Pomona! You should know that!" said Priscilla.
Pomona nodded half-heartedly. "I suppose she's alright, but I don't need twelve of her, do I?"
"Anyway, who is Musidora Barkwith?" asked Priscilla.
Abraxas and Pomona looked at each other in astonishment. "Who's Musidora Barkwith? Don't you know? The famous witch," Abraxas, began, "who wrote 'Wizarding Suite'."
"There's an exploding tuba in it," added Pomona, "and one time, it caused this huge blast which got it banned."
"Really?" Priscilla said. "I've never heard of her yet but this exploding tuba sounds interesting."
"I've got more frogs, Pomona," Abraxas offered. "When did you start to look for Musidora? My Gran was a great fan of hers and she was there when the whole roof blew off!"
"Wow, really? Did she tell you what it was like?" Pomona asked, excitedly. "I read that a lot of people were temporarily deafened by that performance!"
"Yes, well Gran had mentioned that, but she reckoned a lot of the audience thought it was part of the show."
"Merlin's pants!" exclaimed Pomona suddenly. "Look at this! It's her! It's Musidora! I don't believe it!" She turned to Abraxas, holding the card out to him. "Here," she offered. "You should have it. I'd love to keep it... but... you bought the frogs."
Abraxas couldn't hide his surprise. He stammered, "You're... giving... it... to me? Are you sure?"
Pomona smiled. "Don't you want it?"
"Of course I do, but so do you, and it was in your Chocolate Frog, which I gave you. So go on, take it!"
"No," Pomona said. "Your grandmother was there. It's only right that you take it, and—"
"Oh, for goodness sake!" interrupted Priscilla impatiently, "why don't you just tear it in half?" Pomona and Abraxas stared at her in horror, lost for words.
Alistair added, "Too right! At least then we can get on with our game!" He gave them both a defiant grin, and Pomona and Abraxas exchanged sheepish glances.
"You're right," Pomona smiled. "Thank you. Here, Abraxas. I won't take the card. Your Gran will be so happy to see it."
Abraxas took the card and solemnly shaking Pomona's hand said, "Thank you, Pomona. I’ll be forever in your debt."
He gazed at the card with wonder and Pomona smiled, pleased at his true happiness.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Sprout and Malfoy: Two Peas in a Pod?"
Pomona Sprout waited. Platform 9 ¾ was seething with activity. Wizards and witches were saying goodbye to their children. Pomona's parents were trying to smile, but her mother was failing miserably, as big tears streaked her cheeks. Her father was having as bad a time of it, but was stoically heaving her heavy trunk onto the train.
"My dear daughter, I can't believe you're going to Hogwarts!"
"You can call me Pommie, Father!" Pomona said.
She looked small beside the immense train and her parents wondered how she would be able to hold her own in such a big place like Hogwarts.
The train whistle sounded and Pomona hurried to get on the train in time. Her parents waved to her as the Hogwarts Express slowly started to move and she waved back to them. When she could not see them anymore, she thought it was time to look for a compartment. She looked round timidly, wishing there was somebody familiar around that she could talk to.
She wandered down the corridor, looking for a place where she could read her book. She finally found a spot that she liked. It was near the back, and there were several other nervous looking students there. Maybe they're first-years, too, she thought. She sat in the seat nearest the door, and began rummaging through her pockets for her book. After taking out some wilting Flitterbloom leaves, and an old packet of Snapdragon seeds, she pulled out her pocket version of Plants for all Reasons by Violet Thistler.
"I've got a big sister at Hogwarts who's reading that same book!" exclaimed a small blond-haired girl, rising from her seat and plonking herself down next to Pomona. "It's her favorite book," she added, "and she sometimes takes me on nature walks near the village where we live. We look for plants and we pick berries and mushrooms."
Pomona looked at her and smiled. "I'm Pomona Sprout. Pleased to meet you."
"My name is Priscilla. Priscilla Turnip. It's my first time at Hogwarts and I'm ever so excited about it. Have you been there before?"
Pomona shook her head. "No, it's my first year. I wonder which House I'll be sorted into?" Pomona's mother was a Ravenclaw and her father, a Gryffindor, and both were very fond of their respective Houses.
"I hope I'm in the same House as my sister," Priscilla said. "She's in Hufflepuff and they have midnight feasts all the time. I love eating loads of chocolate and jam tarts. If I'm in Hufflepuff, I'll spend more time eating than working, probably!"
Priscilla chuckled and Pomona said, "I don't know what House I want to be in. It doesn't really matter. I just worry about disappointing one of my parents. They were in different Houses, so if I get sorted into either Ravenclaw or Gryffindor, then one of them will be happy, but the other won't." She looked sad.
Priscilla looked sympathetic. "You could be sorted into Hufflepuff!" she exclaimed excitedly. "Then neither of your parents would be offended and we can be friends!"
Pomona brightened when she heard that someone wanted to be her friend. "That would be really cool," Pomona nodded. "I wonder... there's also Slytherin House... But both my parents didn't seem to like it."
One of the boys opposite looked up quickly and said, "Slytherin's the House where all the great wizards of importance and cunning come from. That's the House all my family belonged to. And where I want to be sorted as well." He gave Pomona a long, cold stare. "Your name isn't one I know. Are you a pure-blood?"
Pomona regarded him with increasing distaste. "What difference does that make?" she demanded. And who are you, anyway?"
The boy cast a disdainful eye in return. "You would not ask that if you were a pure-blood. My family is well-known and very distinguished."
"Really?" Pomona said. "I'm sure that's true, but I’ve never seen you before. And anyway, whatever your name is, I don't think you're very nice!"
Pomona glowered at the boy and he glowered back. They were both angry but a cheerful voice made them both stop glaring at each other momentarily.
"Abraxas! Pomona! You two don't want to start quarrelling—"
"Abraxas! That's your name?" Pomona sniggered. "Sounds like a hippogriff or a dragon's name."
"Pomona? Sounds like that greasy stuff people put in their hair..."
"What about my name?" Priscilla chuckled.
"Your name's lovely," Pomona began, but Abraxas interrupted.
"Priscilla? Priscilla's fine, I suppose, but Turnip isn't exactly one of the oldest family names around, is it?"
"In fact it is," teased Priscilla, "We just don't shout it from the rooftops like you do!"
Abraxas looked livid. "Malfoys do no such thing!" he raged.
Priscilla laughed, "Don't get your knickers in a knot. How about a friendly game of Exploding Snap?"
Abraxas looked stunned at first, but then decided that it couldn't hurt. He turned to the boy sitting next to him. "Would you like to play too? It's better with four players, right Alistair?"
The boy shrugged. "I suppose so, but you get very angry if you're not winning, and that'll be more difficult with four players." The boy joined them anyway and Priscilla began laying out the cards.
Alistair Bones secretly hoped that Abraxas wouldn't win. He was really tired of hearing his bragging. A few minutes later the snack trolley witch came by and both boys jumped up. "Perfect timing!" said Alistair gleefully. "I could do with some pumpkin juice and a couple of Cauldron Cakes. I'm famished."
Loaded with goodies, he carefully returned to his seat while Abraxas stayed behind, changing his mind about what to buy. When he finally had enough sweets to feed an army, he turned to the two girls, a genuine smile on his face and asked, "Would you like a Chocolate Frog, Pomona? Priscilla?" He held one out, and Pomona took it, hesitantly.
"Er... thank you. I wonder whose card I got this time? I've been collecting them for three years, never finding a 'Musidora Barkwith'."
Abraxas looked up from his pile of sweets in surprise. "That's what I'm looking for, too!"
"Really?" Pomona asked. She was surprised to find something they had in common.
"My collection has about 500 cards," said Abraxas, "but 'Musidora' is really elusive!"
There was a brief silence while everyone unwrapped their frogs. "Phyllida Spore!" Pomona exclaimed, "The author of One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi!" She looked a bit disappointed. "I already have twelve of those!" she whined. "Besides, what's so special about her?"
"She's a great herbologist, Pomona! You should know that!" said Priscilla.
Pomona nodded half-heartedly. "I suppose she's alright, but I don't need twelve of her, do I?"
"Anyway, who is Musidora Barkwith?" asked Priscilla.
Abraxas and Pomona looked at each other in astonishment. "Who's Musidora Barkwith? Don't you know? The famous witch," Abraxas, began, "who wrote 'Wizarding Suite'."
"There's an exploding tuba in it," added Pomona, "and one time, it caused this huge blast which got it banned."
"Really?" Priscilla said. "I've never heard of her yet but this exploding tuba sounds interesting."
"I've got more frogs, Pomona," Abraxas offered. "When did you start to look for Musidora? My Gran was a great fan of hers and she was there when the whole roof blew off!"
"Wow, really? Did she tell you what it was like?" Pomona asked, excitedly. "I read that a lot of people were temporarily deafened by that performance!"
"Yes, well Gran had mentioned that, but she reckoned a lot of the audience thought it was part of the show."
"Merlin's pants!" exclaimed Pomona suddenly. "Look at this! It's her! It's Musidora! I don't believe it!" She turned to Abraxas, holding the card out to him. "Here," she offered. "You should have it. I'd love to keep it... but... you bought the frogs."
Abraxas couldn't hide his surprise. He stammered, "You're... giving... it... to me? Are you sure?"
Pomona smiled. "Don't you want it?"
"Of course I do, but so do you, and it was in your Chocolate Frog, which I gave you. So go on, take it!"
"No," Pomona said. "Your grandmother was there. It's only right that you take it, and—"
"Oh, for goodness sake!" interrupted Priscilla impatiently, "why don't you just tear it in half?" Pomona and Abraxas stared at her in horror, lost for words.
Alistair added, "Too right! At least then we can get on with our game!" He gave them both a defiant grin, and Pomona and Abraxas exchanged sheepish glances.
"You're right," Pomona smiled. "Thank you. Here, Abraxas. I won't take the card. Your Gran will be so happy to see it."
Abraxas took the card and solemnly shaking Pomona's hand said, "Thank you, Pomona. I’ll be forever in your debt."
He gazed at the card with wonder and Pomona smiled, pleased at his true happiness.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:29 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #96 stats and post-story comments
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:20 pm
These stats were first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 21, 2008 3:28 am (#2420 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 96
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 296
Total Words: 1480
Last Submission Date: #2417, November 19, 2008, 1:39 PM (PatPat)
Total Time to Create Story: 9 days, 3 hours, 37 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story #96, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Sprout and Malfoy: Two Peas in a Pod?"
This story was posted on November 21, 2008. Nine writers contributed to the story, which is 1,480 words long. Four of the nine writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Nov 21, 2008 3:29 am: Okay, 2 evenings of parent-teacher conferences are over and story #96 is finally up! I will be passing on story starting privileges to Verity. Looking forward to your first five words, Verity!
There is room on this thread for 3 short stories (#97, #98, and #99), which would enable us to start the 10th Volume of Five Words stories with Story #100!!! So ... in order to mark this occasion in some special way, we're going to try something new here on Five Words: write back-to-back stories connected by a unified theme. After some discussion via email amongst the contributors to Story #96, the last 3 stories of Five Words: Volume IX will be an HRH trilogy. The setting is DH while the trio is on the run and camping, and in each story, one character shares a true story (about anything at all) from their pre-DH/Hogwarts life. Just to clarify: one story will be a Harry tale, another one about Ron, and a third about Hermione. Of course, they do not need to be in that order. Thanks for the suggestion, Julia!
Because we are trying to fit 3 stories in just under 580 posts, these 3 stories will need to have a max. word limit. For this story, the limit will be 185 posts and 925 words.
It would be a great help if folks could remember to post an update of 'posts left' in intervals of 10, which means when a post ends in 1 there will be 175, 165, 155, 145, etc. posts left. Since we will need to do this in the next 2 stories as well, it would be good to get into this habit quickly. Remember, the magic numbers for this story are posts ending in: -31, -41, -51, -61, -71, -81, -91, etc. Thanks!
- Verity Weasley, Nov 21, 2008 3:47 am: Well, the previous story turned out OK in the end. I was a bit worried that it was meandering around without really going anywhere when we were writing it, but it turned out to be quite a sweet story.
I'm excited to be starting the first of our HRH trilogy. Thank you for passing on story-starting honours, PAH.
- Potteraholic, Nov 21, 2008 4:34 am: My pleasure, Verity!
I, too, liked the previous story. I originally thought it would be a story about the two Ps, Pomona and Priscilla, but think it was much more interesting to have Pomona, a future Hufflepuff, have something in common with Abraxas, a future Slytherin. I noticed the story was predominantly dialog. But I'm not mentioning it because I thought there was anything wrong with that; I'm just making an observation.
Edit: Remember, the magic numbers for this story's 'post updates' are posts ending in 1: -31, -41, -51, -61, -71, -81, -91, etc. Thanks!
- Julia H., Nov 21, 2008 6:34 am: Regarding the previous story, I agree with Verity and PAH. It seemed a bit slow for a while but turned out well in the end. Now I'm quite excited about the new stories.
- Dryleaves, Nov 21, 2008 8:22 am: I agree with what you have already said about the previous story. I thought it was a cute one.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 96
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| Potteraholic | 86 |
| Dryleaves | 44 |
| azi | 26 |
| Verity Weasley | 52 |
| Julia H. | 38 |
| Anna L. Black | 22 |
| Quinn Crockett | 15 |
| mona amon | 12 |
| PatPat | 1 |
Total Submissions: 296
Total Words: 1480
Last Submission Date: #2417, November 19, 2008, 1:39 PM (PatPat)
Total Time to Create Story: 9 days, 3 hours, 37 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story #96, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Sprout and Malfoy: Two Peas in a Pod?"
This story was posted on November 21, 2008. Nine writers contributed to the story, which is 1,480 words long. Four of the nine writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Nov 21, 2008 3:29 am: Okay, 2 evenings of parent-teacher conferences are over and story #96 is finally up! I will be passing on story starting privileges to Verity. Looking forward to your first five words, Verity!
There is room on this thread for 3 short stories (#97, #98, and #99), which would enable us to start the 10th Volume of Five Words stories with Story #100!!! So ... in order to mark this occasion in some special way, we're going to try something new here on Five Words: write back-to-back stories connected by a unified theme. After some discussion via email amongst the contributors to Story #96, the last 3 stories of Five Words: Volume IX will be an HRH trilogy. The setting is DH while the trio is on the run and camping, and in each story, one character shares a true story (about anything at all) from their pre-DH/Hogwarts life. Just to clarify: one story will be a Harry tale, another one about Ron, and a third about Hermione. Of course, they do not need to be in that order. Thanks for the suggestion, Julia!
Because we are trying to fit 3 stories in just under 580 posts, these 3 stories will need to have a max. word limit. For this story, the limit will be 185 posts and 925 words.
It would be a great help if folks could remember to post an update of 'posts left' in intervals of 10, which means when a post ends in 1 there will be 175, 165, 155, 145, etc. posts left. Since we will need to do this in the next 2 stories as well, it would be good to get into this habit quickly. Remember, the magic numbers for this story are posts ending in: -31, -41, -51, -61, -71, -81, -91, etc. Thanks!
- Verity Weasley, Nov 21, 2008 3:47 am: Well, the previous story turned out OK in the end. I was a bit worried that it was meandering around without really going anywhere when we were writing it, but it turned out to be quite a sweet story.
I'm excited to be starting the first of our HRH trilogy. Thank you for passing on story-starting honours, PAH.
- Potteraholic, Nov 21, 2008 4:34 am: My pleasure, Verity!
I, too, liked the previous story. I originally thought it would be a story about the two Ps, Pomona and Priscilla, but think it was much more interesting to have Pomona, a future Hufflepuff, have something in common with Abraxas, a future Slytherin. I noticed the story was predominantly dialog. But I'm not mentioning it because I thought there was anything wrong with that; I'm just making an observation.
Edit: Remember, the magic numbers for this story's 'post updates' are posts ending in 1: -31, -41, -51, -61, -71, -81, -91, etc. Thanks!
- Julia H., Nov 21, 2008 6:34 am: Regarding the previous story, I agree with Verity and PAH. It seemed a bit slow for a while but turned out well in the end. Now I'm quite excited about the new stories.
- Dryleaves, Nov 21, 2008 8:22 am: I agree with what you have already said about the previous story. I thought it was a cute one.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:06 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #97
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:21 pm
This story was first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 29, 2008 8:41 am (#2609 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat in the tent listening to the crackling of the fire that Hermione had conjured. None of them spoke. The silence made Ron uneasy and he decided to break it. "This is just creepy. Can't you two stop thinking about those horcruxes?" he said. "How about doing something enjoyable for a change?"
"We're on the run, aren't we?" Harry answered.
Hermione sighed. "Ron, the Death Eaters are killing people at this moment and you want to enjoy yourself? Really! You need to think..."
"Would it hurt anyone if we talked about something else?" Ron asked.
"Would you like a bedtime story, for example?"
"Bedtime story? Why not?" Ron said with a grin. "It's been a long time since I heard one. Please, Hermione, tell me something entertaining about Muggles. They are so funny!"
"They aren't, but I can tell you a story about the time my cousin Lizzy and I were trying to catch some butterflies." Harry looked at Ron and grinned, remembering the time they had been following the spiders in their second year.
"Butterflies are pretty harmless. That should be a nice, soothing bedtime story, shouldn't it?" said Harry, chuckling.
"Yeah, better than spiders!" Ron said.
"Don't be too sure," said Hermione grimly. "It was quite an adventure, actually. Lizzy and I were camping with my parents when she woke me up one morning with a plan to catch a squirrel she had noticed the day before."
"A squirrel?" Ron interrupted, "I thought you said butterflies!"
"Yes, Ron," Hermione continued patiently. "I'm getting to that. Anyway, we went out and were waiting in a field, near a large hedgerow. We sat there quite a while. We were six years old at that time and didn't like to sit still, so when the squirrel turned up, we laid chase immediately. Soon we came to a—"
"What was so special about that squirrel, anyway?" asked Harry.
"Nothing really," Hermione said. "Lizzy liked it. But we never found it."
Harry caught Ron's eye and gave him a conspiratorial look. "Go on, let's hear more about this non-existent squirrel."
They inched towards the fire, and Hermione continued her story, trying to remember where she had stopped. "While we were running, we spotted a flock of butterflies fluttering nearby. Lizzy wanted to catch one. 'Look at all the pretty colors,' she said, and she dove towards them instead! Suddenly, the ground under her feet gave way, and she fell down some sort of old mineshaft. We had wandered quite far from our tent and nobody heard me when I tried to call for help. I didn't hesitate much. As far as I could see there was only one thing to do."
Ron cried, "You Summoned a ladder and climbed down?"
"She was six, Ron," Harry said. "She didn't even know she was a witch. And she had no wand."
"That's right, Harry," Hermione continued a little impatiently. "I simply clambered down after her. It was difficult, because the shaft sloped down rather steeply, but I made it, safe, and sound, and found Lizzy at the bottom. She was crying but was not hurt. We looked around for something we could use to get out, but it was dark and gloomy. Luckily, some broken ladders happened to be lying around. I found them while stumbling around in the dark, wishing I had some light. Suddenly, a flash of light came from nowhere. It was incredible."
"Wait a minute!" Ron interjected. "So, you conjured a light down there in the tunnel? Didn't you think it was... strange?"
"I was too busy worrying about getting us out of there! We tried to use the broken ladders, but they were too dilapidated. I was wishing desperately for some help but no one heard our cries and I thought we'd be stuck there forever. Then I noticed that Lizzy was sitting on something that very much resembled a coil of rope..."
"Didn't Lizzy notice it first?" Ron asked incredulously.
"No. Well, she swears it wasn't a rope when she was sitting on it, but a rock instead."
Harry smiled. "Poor Lizzy! She must've been so confused: rock one minute, rope the next!"
Hermione chuckled, "Yeah. She jumped up and stared at it in astonishment. Anyway, I made a loop at one end, and we managed to hook it over a tree stump after several attempts. Then we started climbing out, which was easy with the rope to hold on to."
"You were really lucky that the rope was there!" Ron exclaimed.
"I don't think it was just lying there. I think Hermione did magic without knowing it," Harry said.
"Yes, Ron, weren't you listening?" Hermione said. "And I think—"
"Don't you remember, she told us about the mysterious light?" Harry interrupted. "And then the rope appeared unexpectedly? That's like when I somehow grew my hair back every time Petunia cut it."
"Yes, Ron," Hermione continued, "It must have been child magic, which I didn't realize at the time. I had no idea I was a witch. We were young and thought... well, that things like this just happened. Children, even Muggle ones, often believe in magic. But I thought it strange that those things happened so close together. When I received my Hogwarts letter, it started to make sense."
Harry nodded and said, "I know what you mean. Lots of things started making sense after I learned I was a wizard."
Ron looked at Hermione and said, "That was quite some story. But did you ever catch those butterflies?"
"No!" Hermione smiled, "They got away. Just like we did."
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Hermione Remembers When..."
Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat in the tent listening to the crackling of the fire that Hermione had conjured. None of them spoke. The silence made Ron uneasy and he decided to break it. "This is just creepy. Can't you two stop thinking about those horcruxes?" he said. "How about doing something enjoyable for a change?"
"We're on the run, aren't we?" Harry answered.
Hermione sighed. "Ron, the Death Eaters are killing people at this moment and you want to enjoy yourself? Really! You need to think..."
"Would it hurt anyone if we talked about something else?" Ron asked.
"Would you like a bedtime story, for example?"
"Bedtime story? Why not?" Ron said with a grin. "It's been a long time since I heard one. Please, Hermione, tell me something entertaining about Muggles. They are so funny!"
"They aren't, but I can tell you a story about the time my cousin Lizzy and I were trying to catch some butterflies." Harry looked at Ron and grinned, remembering the time they had been following the spiders in their second year.
"Butterflies are pretty harmless. That should be a nice, soothing bedtime story, shouldn't it?" said Harry, chuckling.
"Yeah, better than spiders!" Ron said.
"Don't be too sure," said Hermione grimly. "It was quite an adventure, actually. Lizzy and I were camping with my parents when she woke me up one morning with a plan to catch a squirrel she had noticed the day before."
"A squirrel?" Ron interrupted, "I thought you said butterflies!"
"Yes, Ron," Hermione continued patiently. "I'm getting to that. Anyway, we went out and were waiting in a field, near a large hedgerow. We sat there quite a while. We were six years old at that time and didn't like to sit still, so when the squirrel turned up, we laid chase immediately. Soon we came to a—"
"What was so special about that squirrel, anyway?" asked Harry.
"Nothing really," Hermione said. "Lizzy liked it. But we never found it."
Harry caught Ron's eye and gave him a conspiratorial look. "Go on, let's hear more about this non-existent squirrel."
They inched towards the fire, and Hermione continued her story, trying to remember where she had stopped. "While we were running, we spotted a flock of butterflies fluttering nearby. Lizzy wanted to catch one. 'Look at all the pretty colors,' she said, and she dove towards them instead! Suddenly, the ground under her feet gave way, and she fell down some sort of old mineshaft. We had wandered quite far from our tent and nobody heard me when I tried to call for help. I didn't hesitate much. As far as I could see there was only one thing to do."
Ron cried, "You Summoned a ladder and climbed down?"
"She was six, Ron," Harry said. "She didn't even know she was a witch. And she had no wand."
"That's right, Harry," Hermione continued a little impatiently. "I simply clambered down after her. It was difficult, because the shaft sloped down rather steeply, but I made it, safe, and sound, and found Lizzy at the bottom. She was crying but was not hurt. We looked around for something we could use to get out, but it was dark and gloomy. Luckily, some broken ladders happened to be lying around. I found them while stumbling around in the dark, wishing I had some light. Suddenly, a flash of light came from nowhere. It was incredible."
"Wait a minute!" Ron interjected. "So, you conjured a light down there in the tunnel? Didn't you think it was... strange?"
"I was too busy worrying about getting us out of there! We tried to use the broken ladders, but they were too dilapidated. I was wishing desperately for some help but no one heard our cries and I thought we'd be stuck there forever. Then I noticed that Lizzy was sitting on something that very much resembled a coil of rope..."
"Didn't Lizzy notice it first?" Ron asked incredulously.
"No. Well, she swears it wasn't a rope when she was sitting on it, but a rock instead."
Harry smiled. "Poor Lizzy! She must've been so confused: rock one minute, rope the next!"
Hermione chuckled, "Yeah. She jumped up and stared at it in astonishment. Anyway, I made a loop at one end, and we managed to hook it over a tree stump after several attempts. Then we started climbing out, which was easy with the rope to hold on to."
"You were really lucky that the rope was there!" Ron exclaimed.
"I don't think it was just lying there. I think Hermione did magic without knowing it," Harry said.
"Yes, Ron, weren't you listening?" Hermione said. "And I think—"
"Don't you remember, she told us about the mysterious light?" Harry interrupted. "And then the rope appeared unexpectedly? That's like when I somehow grew my hair back every time Petunia cut it."
"Yes, Ron," Hermione continued, "It must have been child magic, which I didn't realize at the time. I had no idea I was a witch. We were young and thought... well, that things like this just happened. Children, even Muggle ones, often believe in magic. But I thought it strange that those things happened so close together. When I received my Hogwarts letter, it started to make sense."
Harry nodded and said, "I know what you mean. Lots of things started making sense after I learned I was a wizard."
Ron looked at Hermione and said, "That was quite some story. But did you ever catch those butterflies?"
"No!" Hermione smiled, "They got away. Just like we did."
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:29 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #97 stats and post-story comments
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:23 pm
These stats were first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 29, 2008 8:42 am (#2610 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 97
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 187
Total Words: 935
Last Submission Date: #2608, November 28, 2008, 6:40 AM (Verity Weasley)
Total Time to Create Story: 7 days, 2 hours, 53 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story #97, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Hermione Remembers When..."
This story was posted on November 29, 2008. Ten writers contributed to the story, which is 935 words long. Four of the ten writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Nov 29, 2008 8:43 am: Story #97, the first of our Volume IX 'HRH Trilogy' is finished! I think it turned out quite well!
Congrats to Verity! Looking forward to your first five words to start the next story in the trilogy.
While the trio is recounting a story from their lives in each of these Trilogy's tales, I think it would be fitting to have the trio interact with each other as much as possible. As PatPat said in this post, I agree... about being careful not to have too much of this story be a monologue. It's true that the story needs to be told, but it is more realistic if Ron and Harry actually comment rather than just sitting there mute. That's not very in character at all. Their reactions might just be the best part. Someone in the Pomona and Abraxas story said something similar, (I'm paraphrasing here): it didn't matter what the story on the train was about, just how we told it. I think the same would be true in these tales.
On that note, here are some thoughts I had a few posts ago about the next two stories:
As this story ends, I'm thinking about the next story in our trilogy, and how to have one story flow well into the next. It seems to me that Hermione started this one to make Ron happy, or at least to get him to stop going on about the 3 of them doing something enjoyable. Once Hermione's story finishes, I imagine that Ron would be excited to tell a story, somewhat like an eager puppy, falling over its feet to chase a ball or something. With Harry's mind preoccupied with the search of the horcruxes, I imagine that he wouldn't be in much of a storytelling mood, and would need to be coaxed into telling one by Ron and Hermione. His tale would be the last one told, I imagine. Any thoughts?
Verity responded with: That idea sounds perfectly reasonable. I can imagine that Ron would be eager to go next. Verity, since you will be starting our next story, and since you seemed to think it made sense for Ron to tell the next tale, I'm thinking that this second story of the trilogy will be Ron's?
*********************************************
Because we are trying to fit 2 stories in just under 390 posts, these 2 stories will need to have a max. word limit. For this story, the limit will be 190 posts and 950 words.
It would be a great help if folks could remember to post an update of 'posts left' in intervals of 10, which means when a post ends in 2 there will be 190, 180, 170, 160, 150, 140, etc. posts left. We got into the habit of doing this quite well in Hermione's story — Thanks, everyone! —, and since we'll need to do this in the next story as well, it is important that we keep this habit going. Remember, the magic numbers for this story are posts ending in: -12, -22, -32, -42, -52, -62, -72, -82, -92, etc. Thanks!
Last (hopefully), but definitely not least, since we can only use limited words to tell this story, can we please use contractions whenever possible? Thanks, again! And, PHEW!, finally done!
- Verity Weasley, Nov 29, 2008 11:56 am: Wow, I can't believe I got the most posts in that story, and I'm surprised you managed to get it up so quickly PAH. I hope you had a lovely Thanksgiving.
I agree that Ron should tell the next story. There should be plenty of scope there.
- Anna L. Black, Nov 29, 2008 9:20 pm: I think the last story was short and sweet. A bit of a stretch for 6-year old girls to manage with a lasso, but Hermione's talented for a reason... Oh, and there's still that squirrel that wasn't changed to "no squirrel"
- Verity Weasley, Nov 29, 2008 9:21 pm: Yes, it was a bit of a stretch for 6 year olds, but that's how we know magic was lending a helping hand. It was a sweet little story, and the interruptions sounded genuine. Since we know this is the first of a trilogy, perhaps folks are waiting to comment until the end.
- mona amon, Nov 30, 2008 6:59 am: I thought the previous story was rather good!
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 97
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| Verity Weasley | 47 |
| Potteraholic | 42 |
| Julia H. | 24 |
| Quinn Crockett | 1 |
| Dryleaves | 35 |
| Anna L. Black | 5 |
| PatPat | 5 |
| mona amon | 26 |
| Pesky Pixie | 1 |
| azi | 1 |
Total Submissions: 187
Total Words: 935
Last Submission Date: #2608, November 28, 2008, 6:40 AM (Verity Weasley)
Total Time to Create Story: 7 days, 2 hours, 53 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story #97, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Hermione Remembers When..."
This story was posted on November 29, 2008. Ten writers contributed to the story, which is 935 words long. Four of the ten writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Nov 29, 2008 8:43 am: Story #97, the first of our Volume IX 'HRH Trilogy' is finished! I think it turned out quite well!
Congrats to Verity! Looking forward to your first five words to start the next story in the trilogy.
While the trio is recounting a story from their lives in each of these Trilogy's tales, I think it would be fitting to have the trio interact with each other as much as possible. As PatPat said in this post, I agree... about being careful not to have too much of this story be a monologue. It's true that the story needs to be told, but it is more realistic if Ron and Harry actually comment rather than just sitting there mute. That's not very in character at all. Their reactions might just be the best part. Someone in the Pomona and Abraxas story said something similar, (I'm paraphrasing here): it didn't matter what the story on the train was about, just how we told it. I think the same would be true in these tales.
On that note, here are some thoughts I had a few posts ago about the next two stories:
As this story ends, I'm thinking about the next story in our trilogy, and how to have one story flow well into the next. It seems to me that Hermione started this one to make Ron happy, or at least to get him to stop going on about the 3 of them doing something enjoyable. Once Hermione's story finishes, I imagine that Ron would be excited to tell a story, somewhat like an eager puppy, falling over its feet to chase a ball or something. With Harry's mind preoccupied with the search of the horcruxes, I imagine that he wouldn't be in much of a storytelling mood, and would need to be coaxed into telling one by Ron and Hermione. His tale would be the last one told, I imagine. Any thoughts?
Verity responded with: That idea sounds perfectly reasonable. I can imagine that Ron would be eager to go next. Verity, since you will be starting our next story, and since you seemed to think it made sense for Ron to tell the next tale, I'm thinking that this second story of the trilogy will be Ron's?
*********************************************
Because we are trying to fit 2 stories in just under 390 posts, these 2 stories will need to have a max. word limit. For this story, the limit will be 190 posts and 950 words.
It would be a great help if folks could remember to post an update of 'posts left' in intervals of 10, which means when a post ends in 2 there will be 190, 180, 170, 160, 150, 140, etc. posts left. We got into the habit of doing this quite well in Hermione's story — Thanks, everyone! —, and since we'll need to do this in the next story as well, it is important that we keep this habit going. Remember, the magic numbers for this story are posts ending in: -12, -22, -32, -42, -52, -62, -72, -82, -92, etc. Thanks!
Last (hopefully), but definitely not least, since we can only use limited words to tell this story, can we please use contractions whenever possible? Thanks, again! And, PHEW!, finally done!
- Verity Weasley, Nov 29, 2008 11:56 am: Wow, I can't believe I got the most posts in that story, and I'm surprised you managed to get it up so quickly PAH. I hope you had a lovely Thanksgiving.
I agree that Ron should tell the next story. There should be plenty of scope there.
- Anna L. Black, Nov 29, 2008 9:20 pm: I think the last story was short and sweet. A bit of a stretch for 6-year old girls to manage with a lasso, but Hermione's talented for a reason... Oh, and there's still that squirrel that wasn't changed to "no squirrel"
- Verity Weasley, Nov 29, 2008 9:21 pm: Yes, it was a bit of a stretch for 6 year olds, but that's how we know magic was lending a helping hand. It was a sweet little story, and the interruptions sounded genuine. Since we know this is the first of a trilogy, perhaps folks are waiting to comment until the end.
- mona amon, Nov 30, 2008 6:59 am: I thought the previous story was rather good!
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:10 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #98
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:24 pm
This story was first posted by Potteraholic - Dec 8, 2008 4:27 am (#2803 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
The fire crackled as Ron sat staring into the flames. "I always knew I was a wizard."
"You could've been a Squib," Hermione said.
"Yeah," Ron nodded, "Mum and Dad are both pure-bloods so it would've been weird to be the only non-magical Weasley, wouldn't it? But there wasn't much danger of that. Ginny and I proved our magical talents at a very young age."
"You did?" Harry asked. "How come you couldn't turn Scabbers yellow, then?"
"I was trying to but the spell was fake, remember? Fred and George tried to make me look like a fool."
There was a silence as Harry and Hermione thought back to that day and both avoided confirming the plan's success.
"So," Harry said to break the silence, "what did you and Ginny do to show your magical skills? Ginny's never told me anything about it."
"Nor me," Hermione said.
"Well," Ron began, "We must've been about five, and we were playing in—"
"Wait, who was five? You were older than Ginny, weren't you?" Hermione queried.
"Obviously," Ron answered, rolling his eyes. "I meant that I was five. Anyway, we were in the kitchen and there was this huge pot of boiling water. Mum's attention was distracted by the garden gnomes being chased around the yard by Charlie on his broom. Ginny came over to me with her toy broomstick in her hands and asked if I wanted to play Quidditch with her."
"Let me guess," said Hermione, giggling. "You burnt the whole kitchen down?"
"No," Ron replied with a chuckle. "Ginny wanted to show off her broomstick skills, so she got on her broom and started to fly in circles over the kitchen table. She wasn't watching where she was going, so the tail of her broom pushed the pot of water off the stove right over me."
"You got boiling water all over you?" exclaimed Hermione.
"No," answered Ron, "the water just stopped in mid-air, centimeters from my head, and sort of waterfalled over me", he explained, as Hermione gasped in horror.
"Who stopped the water?" Harry asked with interest. He looked a little too concerned, Ron thought.
"I did," he shrugged. "Then, Mum came in and started going mad because she thought I was hurt. When she found out I was all right, she quickly changed her tune."
"I wouldn't blame her," said Hermione.
“Blame her for what?" Ron asked.
"For almost going mad," Hermione answered.
"What happened to Ginny?" Harry asked with greater interest. Ron grinned. "She flew out of the window. She was so afraid, that her toy broomstick flew like a real one. Mum was torn between anger at us both and worry over Ginny's safety. I think she was secretly happy that we actually possessed some magical ability."
"It must be like a Muggle mother seeing her child take their first steps," said Hermione, suddenly wistful. No one spoke for a few minutes; Hermione was thinking about her own parents, while Harry pictured his mum and dad as they had looked as young, happy parents.
Ron suddenly broke the silence. "Anyway, that's the first time I remember Ginny or me using magic, but Fred and George were doing accidental spells before they could hold a wand."
"Somehow I'm not surprised," Harry laughed, picturing Fred and George as ginger-headed toddlers, exploding things around the house and generally causing mayhem.
"Yeah, they were always getting into trouble, even before they went to Hogwarts," Ron grinned. "They always tried to practice on me. Bill and Charlie looked out for me, but there was only so much they could do. Well, at least I survived..."
"You weren't turned into something horrible, thankfully," Hermione sighed.
"Not that they didn't try," Ron complained. "I had a tail for a week after they "borrowed" Great Auntie Muriel's wand and tested a spell on me. It took Dad that long to figure out how to get rid of it."
"What sort of tail?" Harry asked, remembering Dudley's curly pig's tail.
"It was long and scaly, sort of like a lizard's. Mum was furious! The thing is, Fred and George's tricks had been much less polished then. They couldn't remember exactly what they said. That was why it took so long. Dad didn't want to make things worse. And Auntie Muriel's wand always was a bit unpredictable. Ever since then, I've had a healthy respect for Fred and George's abilities."
"It's different when you're an only child," said Hermione. "There's no one to bother or play tricks on you and you must play alone most of the time. I think you're lucky to have brothers."
Harry nodded in agreement. "And a sister. Let's not forget her either...” He sighed.
"Ginny was lucky. Fred and George used me as a guinea pig—"
"You already mentioned that," Harry said. "Dudley used me as a punching bag — or at least he tried to — but I usually managed to get away."
They sat around the fire, watching the dancing flames. "You're lucky though. You grew up with laughter," Harry said.
"Well, that's true, I suppose, but Mum wasn't laughing much the day I sprouted a striped, green tail! That was the first time I heard her swear!"
"What did she say?" asked Hermione with a giggle, "Merlin's pants?"
"No, er... I'd better not repeat it. You don't know her... She really knows how to express her feelings... precisely."
"We'll have to take your word for it, then," Harry said smiling. He was trying to enjoy the moment, one of the few happy ones the three friends had shared in the last months.
"You certainly kept that tail a secret," Hermione teased. Ron grinned sheepishly. "Wonder how many more tails to tell before sunrise."
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Ron’s Long-Held Secret"
The fire crackled as Ron sat staring into the flames. "I always knew I was a wizard."
"You could've been a Squib," Hermione said.
"Yeah," Ron nodded, "Mum and Dad are both pure-bloods so it would've been weird to be the only non-magical Weasley, wouldn't it? But there wasn't much danger of that. Ginny and I proved our magical talents at a very young age."
"You did?" Harry asked. "How come you couldn't turn Scabbers yellow, then?"
"I was trying to but the spell was fake, remember? Fred and George tried to make me look like a fool."
There was a silence as Harry and Hermione thought back to that day and both avoided confirming the plan's success.
"So," Harry said to break the silence, "what did you and Ginny do to show your magical skills? Ginny's never told me anything about it."
"Nor me," Hermione said.
"Well," Ron began, "We must've been about five, and we were playing in—"
"Wait, who was five? You were older than Ginny, weren't you?" Hermione queried.
"Obviously," Ron answered, rolling his eyes. "I meant that I was five. Anyway, we were in the kitchen and there was this huge pot of boiling water. Mum's attention was distracted by the garden gnomes being chased around the yard by Charlie on his broom. Ginny came over to me with her toy broomstick in her hands and asked if I wanted to play Quidditch with her."
"Let me guess," said Hermione, giggling. "You burnt the whole kitchen down?"
"No," Ron replied with a chuckle. "Ginny wanted to show off her broomstick skills, so she got on her broom and started to fly in circles over the kitchen table. She wasn't watching where she was going, so the tail of her broom pushed the pot of water off the stove right over me."
"You got boiling water all over you?" exclaimed Hermione.
"No," answered Ron, "the water just stopped in mid-air, centimeters from my head, and sort of waterfalled over me", he explained, as Hermione gasped in horror.
"Who stopped the water?" Harry asked with interest. He looked a little too concerned, Ron thought.
"I did," he shrugged. "Then, Mum came in and started going mad because she thought I was hurt. When she found out I was all right, she quickly changed her tune."
"I wouldn't blame her," said Hermione.
“Blame her for what?" Ron asked.
"For almost going mad," Hermione answered.
"What happened to Ginny?" Harry asked with greater interest. Ron grinned. "She flew out of the window. She was so afraid, that her toy broomstick flew like a real one. Mum was torn between anger at us both and worry over Ginny's safety. I think she was secretly happy that we actually possessed some magical ability."
"It must be like a Muggle mother seeing her child take their first steps," said Hermione, suddenly wistful. No one spoke for a few minutes; Hermione was thinking about her own parents, while Harry pictured his mum and dad as they had looked as young, happy parents.
Ron suddenly broke the silence. "Anyway, that's the first time I remember Ginny or me using magic, but Fred and George were doing accidental spells before they could hold a wand."
"Somehow I'm not surprised," Harry laughed, picturing Fred and George as ginger-headed toddlers, exploding things around the house and generally causing mayhem.
"Yeah, they were always getting into trouble, even before they went to Hogwarts," Ron grinned. "They always tried to practice on me. Bill and Charlie looked out for me, but there was only so much they could do. Well, at least I survived..."
"You weren't turned into something horrible, thankfully," Hermione sighed.
"Not that they didn't try," Ron complained. "I had a tail for a week after they "borrowed" Great Auntie Muriel's wand and tested a spell on me. It took Dad that long to figure out how to get rid of it."
"What sort of tail?" Harry asked, remembering Dudley's curly pig's tail.
"It was long and scaly, sort of like a lizard's. Mum was furious! The thing is, Fred and George's tricks had been much less polished then. They couldn't remember exactly what they said. That was why it took so long. Dad didn't want to make things worse. And Auntie Muriel's wand always was a bit unpredictable. Ever since then, I've had a healthy respect for Fred and George's abilities."
"It's different when you're an only child," said Hermione. "There's no one to bother or play tricks on you and you must play alone most of the time. I think you're lucky to have brothers."
Harry nodded in agreement. "And a sister. Let's not forget her either...” He sighed.
"Ginny was lucky. Fred and George used me as a guinea pig—"
"You already mentioned that," Harry said. "Dudley used me as a punching bag — or at least he tried to — but I usually managed to get away."
They sat around the fire, watching the dancing flames. "You're lucky though. You grew up with laughter," Harry said.
"Well, that's true, I suppose, but Mum wasn't laughing much the day I sprouted a striped, green tail! That was the first time I heard her swear!"
"What did she say?" asked Hermione with a giggle, "Merlin's pants?"
"No, er... I'd better not repeat it. You don't know her... She really knows how to express her feelings... precisely."
"We'll have to take your word for it, then," Harry said smiling. He was trying to enjoy the moment, one of the few happy ones the three friends had shared in the last months.
"You certainly kept that tail a secret," Hermione teased. Ron grinned sheepishly. "Wonder how many more tails to tell before sunrise."
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:30 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #98 stats and post-story comments
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:26 pm
These stats were first posted by Potteraholic - Dec 8, 2008 4:31 am (#2804 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 98
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 191
Total Words: 955
Last Submission Date: #2802, December 7, 2008, 2:33 AM (Quinn Crockett)
Total Time to Create Story: 7 days, 14 hours, 37 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story #98, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Ron's Long-Held Secret"
This story was posted on December 8, 2008. Nine writers contributed to the story, which is 955 words long. Five of the nine writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Dec 8, 2008 4:32 am: The second of our Volume IX's 'HRH Trilogy', Story #98, is finished! I think we did a good job writing dialogue that was in keeping with the trio's personalities. I think we were most successful with Hermione's, and then with Harry's. To me, Ron's speech sometimes sounds more polished or refined — more 'proper' — than it does in the books. ... What are your thoughts about the story? Please include a sentence or 2 in your next post. Thanks!
In any case, Hermione's and Ron's stories are done and now we just have Harry's campfire tale to tell. With Harry's mind preoccupied with the search of the horcruxes, I imagine that he wouldn't be in much of a storytelling mood, and would need to be coaxed into telling one by Ron and Hermione. But that's just how I see it. ... What story from his youth will Harry share? I made a suggestion here, near the end of Ron's tale, but it's only an idea. There are countless others!
Remember, since we can only use limited words to tell this story, can we please use contractions whenever possible? We got really good at doing this in the last story. Thanks, again!
- Verity Weasley, Dec 8, 2008 10:44 am: I thought the last story turned out quite well. It felt like more of a conversation than a self-contained story, as Hermione's was, but perhaps that is just more consistent with Ron's style. I agree that the dialogue sounded pretty convincing for the trio.
- Columbine Fairy, Dec 9, 2008 12:37 pm: I'm back (again, sort of - just from a weekend away this time! I'm liking these trio tent tales - it's like a mini HP Decameron!)
- Dryleaves, Dec 9, 2008 2:21 pm: PAH, I think CF referred to "Decamerone", by Boccaccio, a collection of short stories held together by a frame story, where a group of people are fleeing from the Black Death and tell each other stories; something like in Canterbury tales or Arabian Nights. Maybe you can call a story collection like that a Decameron? Or maybe that is just what it is called in English...
I liked the last story, BTW!
- Potteraholic, Dec 9, 2008 2:42 pm: Thanks for the explanation of 'Decameron', Dryleaves. I'm sure that's what CF means!
Edit: I just checked out the wikipedia article for 'Decameron'. I want to read those stories now; wonder if they're available in my local library or bookstore? Thanks, CF, for making that connection. I'm going to use this reference in my post-story comments. Thanks!
- Julia H., Dec 9, 2008 2:48 pm: It would be a truly mini Decameron, though, since Decameron means 'ten days' and these stories are told in one night. Perhaps we could alter the name a bit. ('One night' in Greek, anyone?)
- Potteraholic, Dec 9, 2008 2:55 pm: Julia, in answer to your question, "one day" in Greek is "mia mera" (from www*justanswer.com), so our collection is a 'Miameron', I guess!
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 98
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| Verity Weasley | 43 |
| azi | 5 |
| Dryleaves | 20 |
| Potteraholic | 53 |
| Julia H. | 18 |
| Quinn Crockett | 20 |
| Anna L. Black | 15 |
| Columbine Fairy | 11 |
| mona amon | 83 |
Total Submissions: 191
Total Words: 955
Last Submission Date: #2802, December 7, 2008, 2:33 AM (Quinn Crockett)
Total Time to Create Story: 7 days, 14 hours, 37 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story #98, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Ron's Long-Held Secret"
This story was posted on December 8, 2008. Nine writers contributed to the story, which is 955 words long. Five of the nine writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Dec 8, 2008 4:32 am: The second of our Volume IX's 'HRH Trilogy', Story #98, is finished! I think we did a good job writing dialogue that was in keeping with the trio's personalities. I think we were most successful with Hermione's, and then with Harry's. To me, Ron's speech sometimes sounds more polished or refined — more 'proper' — than it does in the books. ... What are your thoughts about the story? Please include a sentence or 2 in your next post. Thanks!
In any case, Hermione's and Ron's stories are done and now we just have Harry's campfire tale to tell. With Harry's mind preoccupied with the search of the horcruxes, I imagine that he wouldn't be in much of a storytelling mood, and would need to be coaxed into telling one by Ron and Hermione. But that's just how I see it. ... What story from his youth will Harry share? I made a suggestion here, near the end of Ron's tale, but it's only an idea. There are countless others!
Remember, since we can only use limited words to tell this story, can we please use contractions whenever possible? We got really good at doing this in the last story. Thanks, again!
- Verity Weasley, Dec 8, 2008 10:44 am: I thought the last story turned out quite well. It felt like more of a conversation than a self-contained story, as Hermione's was, but perhaps that is just more consistent with Ron's style. I agree that the dialogue sounded pretty convincing for the trio.
- Columbine Fairy, Dec 9, 2008 12:37 pm: I'm back (again, sort of - just from a weekend away this time! I'm liking these trio tent tales - it's like a mini HP Decameron!)
- Dryleaves, Dec 9, 2008 2:21 pm: PAH, I think CF referred to "Decamerone", by Boccaccio, a collection of short stories held together by a frame story, where a group of people are fleeing from the Black Death and tell each other stories; something like in Canterbury tales or Arabian Nights. Maybe you can call a story collection like that a Decameron? Or maybe that is just what it is called in English...
I liked the last story, BTW!
- Potteraholic, Dec 9, 2008 2:42 pm: Thanks for the explanation of 'Decameron', Dryleaves. I'm sure that's what CF means!
Edit: I just checked out the wikipedia article for 'Decameron'. I want to read those stories now; wonder if they're available in my local library or bookstore? Thanks, CF, for making that connection. I'm going to use this reference in my post-story comments. Thanks!
- Julia H., Dec 9, 2008 2:48 pm: It would be a truly mini Decameron, though, since Decameron means 'ten days' and these stories are told in one night. Perhaps we could alter the name a bit. ('One night' in Greek, anyone?)
- Potteraholic, Dec 9, 2008 2:55 pm: Julia, in answer to your question, "one day" in Greek is "mia mera" (from www*justanswer.com), so our collection is a 'Miameron', I guess!
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:13 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Join date : 2011-02-18
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #99
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:27 pm
This story was first posted by Potteraholic - Dec 20, 2008 11:38 am (#2986 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Hermione looked over at Harry. He was gazing into the fire with a thoughtful air. "It's my turn to stand watch," Harry announced. "You two should get some sleep. We'll have to work again tomorrow."
"Hang on," said Ron. "We'd like to hear a story from you first. We've both told one. It's your turn now."
Ron and Hermione were looking at him expectantly. He didn't want to disappoint them so he took his time to think about something he hadn't told them before. I didn't have a happy childhood, so a cheerful story is out of the question. I could tell them about the time Dudley and his gang tried to shove me into the garden shed. Harry's thoughts searched his past. When had that happened?
"Oi, Harry! We're waiting!" Ron remarked impatiently. Harry shrugged his shoulders and said, "Well, if you insist. I was trying to remember the first time I did magic without realizing it. I think I was about five or six. It was the summer and it was Dudley's birthday. As soon as I went into the kitchen, Aunt Petunia tried to get me out by telling me to go and iron Dudley's best jacket so he could wear it at breakfast."
"What?" Hermione exclaimed indignantly. "You were made to use a hot iron?! That's dangerous!"
"Well, obviously Aunt Petunia wasn't too concerned if I got hurt, even at that age," Harry said.
"You could've burnt the house down, mate!" Ron said. "Maybe she'd've cared then, the miserable old bat!"
"Well," Harry said, "though I could barely lift the thing, I got the iron and took it into the lounge. Aunt Petunia had already set up the ironing board."
"How were you, a little boy, expected to reach the ironing board?" asked an incredulous Hermione.
"Aunt Petunia had very thoughtfully placed a chair alongside it so I could reach," explained Harry. "But as you might expect, it was tricky getting the iron plugged in and set to the right temperature. Anyway, I dragged Dudley's jacket across the floor, then put it on the table while—"
"Muggle ironing sounds complicated," Ron interrupted. "Mum always just does it with magic."
"Of course she does," said Hermione impatiently, "she's a witch, Ron! Honestly!"
Harry decided to intervene before she and Ron started bickering. "Anyway, I'd put it down on the table to smooth it out and suddenly the iron started to hiss loudly. Steam was pouring out of it, so I quickly climbed on the chair to stop it. I frantically turned its dial round, but then slipped off the wobbly chair, knocking the iron onto the carpet! It was so hot that it burnt a hole straight through to the bare floor. I grabbed Dudley's jacket and put it on the couch, looking around for something I could use to pick up the hot iron. Dudley's jacket was the only thing within reach so I decided to take my chances and—"
"You used the jacket to pick up the iron? Were you mental?" Ron asked with an incredulous look.
"I was panicking and I was a kid," Harry protested. "I wasn't thinking. It was a new carpet and the burn was in a prominent place. Aunt Petunia wouldn't have been able to miss it. She'd've really gone mental! Anyway, the jacket didn't help, as the iron was so hot it melted the fabric and it stuck to the carpet! By this point, the carpet was starting to smoke and a horrible smell was filling the room. I was on the verge of calling for help when I realized Aunt Petunia would probably kill me!"
"You poor thing!" Hermione said sympathetically. "What did you do then?"
"I unplugged the iron to cool it down and grabbed a vase from the windowsill. In my haste I forgot that it didn't have any water in it... artificial flowers, you see," Harry said with a bitter smile, remembering his life then.
"Never mind," Hermione said consolingly. "What did you do?"
"I just panicked and put my hand over the burn. I guess I hoped the Dursleys wouldn't notice. I couldn't believe what happened next, though. I was desperately hoping that the burn would just disappear and that somehow the jacket would be restored and come loose from the carpet. Then I felt something strange. It was as if the carpet was rapidly stretching under my fingertips. I slowly lifted my hand and—"
"The burn was gone?" asked Ron, excitedly.
Harry nodded solemnly. "That's right," he said, with a shrug. "I don't know how it happened, but the jacket was also mended! I picked it up and saw that all the melted fabric was gone. It looked like a brand new jacket!"
"So you did magic?" Hermione asked.
"Yes, but I didn't realize at the time, obviously," Harry said. "I didn't have the faintest idea how it happened. I was just relieved that everything was back to normal. Aunt Petunia came in and yelled at me for taking so long, so I showed her Dudley's crisply pressed jacket. She looked astounded and stood there dumbstruck. Then she shrugged, grabbed the jacket and left."
"Without even thanking you? That's awfully rude," said Hermione, frowning. "It's amazing how you turned out so nice after all the things those horrible people did to you!"
Harry thought, The Dursleys were bad, but they were no Voldemort.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Harry Strikes While the Iron is Hot"
Hermione looked over at Harry. He was gazing into the fire with a thoughtful air. "It's my turn to stand watch," Harry announced. "You two should get some sleep. We'll have to work again tomorrow."
"Hang on," said Ron. "We'd like to hear a story from you first. We've both told one. It's your turn now."
Ron and Hermione were looking at him expectantly. He didn't want to disappoint them so he took his time to think about something he hadn't told them before. I didn't have a happy childhood, so a cheerful story is out of the question. I could tell them about the time Dudley and his gang tried to shove me into the garden shed. Harry's thoughts searched his past. When had that happened?
"Oi, Harry! We're waiting!" Ron remarked impatiently. Harry shrugged his shoulders and said, "Well, if you insist. I was trying to remember the first time I did magic without realizing it. I think I was about five or six. It was the summer and it was Dudley's birthday. As soon as I went into the kitchen, Aunt Petunia tried to get me out by telling me to go and iron Dudley's best jacket so he could wear it at breakfast."
"What?" Hermione exclaimed indignantly. "You were made to use a hot iron?! That's dangerous!"
"Well, obviously Aunt Petunia wasn't too concerned if I got hurt, even at that age," Harry said.
"You could've burnt the house down, mate!" Ron said. "Maybe she'd've cared then, the miserable old bat!"
"Well," Harry said, "though I could barely lift the thing, I got the iron and took it into the lounge. Aunt Petunia had already set up the ironing board."
"How were you, a little boy, expected to reach the ironing board?" asked an incredulous Hermione.
"Aunt Petunia had very thoughtfully placed a chair alongside it so I could reach," explained Harry. "But as you might expect, it was tricky getting the iron plugged in and set to the right temperature. Anyway, I dragged Dudley's jacket across the floor, then put it on the table while—"
"Muggle ironing sounds complicated," Ron interrupted. "Mum always just does it with magic."
"Of course she does," said Hermione impatiently, "she's a witch, Ron! Honestly!"
Harry decided to intervene before she and Ron started bickering. "Anyway, I'd put it down on the table to smooth it out and suddenly the iron started to hiss loudly. Steam was pouring out of it, so I quickly climbed on the chair to stop it. I frantically turned its dial round, but then slipped off the wobbly chair, knocking the iron onto the carpet! It was so hot that it burnt a hole straight through to the bare floor. I grabbed Dudley's jacket and put it on the couch, looking around for something I could use to pick up the hot iron. Dudley's jacket was the only thing within reach so I decided to take my chances and—"
"You used the jacket to pick up the iron? Were you mental?" Ron asked with an incredulous look.
"I was panicking and I was a kid," Harry protested. "I wasn't thinking. It was a new carpet and the burn was in a prominent place. Aunt Petunia wouldn't have been able to miss it. She'd've really gone mental! Anyway, the jacket didn't help, as the iron was so hot it melted the fabric and it stuck to the carpet! By this point, the carpet was starting to smoke and a horrible smell was filling the room. I was on the verge of calling for help when I realized Aunt Petunia would probably kill me!"
"You poor thing!" Hermione said sympathetically. "What did you do then?"
"I unplugged the iron to cool it down and grabbed a vase from the windowsill. In my haste I forgot that it didn't have any water in it... artificial flowers, you see," Harry said with a bitter smile, remembering his life then.
"Never mind," Hermione said consolingly. "What did you do?"
"I just panicked and put my hand over the burn. I guess I hoped the Dursleys wouldn't notice. I couldn't believe what happened next, though. I was desperately hoping that the burn would just disappear and that somehow the jacket would be restored and come loose from the carpet. Then I felt something strange. It was as if the carpet was rapidly stretching under my fingertips. I slowly lifted my hand and—"
"The burn was gone?" asked Ron, excitedly.
Harry nodded solemnly. "That's right," he said, with a shrug. "I don't know how it happened, but the jacket was also mended! I picked it up and saw that all the melted fabric was gone. It looked like a brand new jacket!"
"So you did magic?" Hermione asked.
"Yes, but I didn't realize at the time, obviously," Harry said. "I didn't have the faintest idea how it happened. I was just relieved that everything was back to normal. Aunt Petunia came in and yelled at me for taking so long, so I showed her Dudley's crisply pressed jacket. She looked astounded and stood there dumbstruck. Then she shrugged, grabbed the jacket and left."
"Without even thanking you? That's awfully rude," said Hermione, frowning. "It's amazing how you turned out so nice after all the things those horrible people did to you!"
Harry thought, The Dursleys were bad, but they were no Voldemort.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:30 pm; edited 1 time in total
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- Posts : 4241
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Story #99 stats and post-story comments
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:29 pm
These stats were first posted by Potteraholic - Dec 20, 2008 11:38 am (#2987 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 99
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 180
Total Words: 900
Last Submission Date: #2984, December 18, 2008, 6:12 PM (azi)
Total Time to Create Story: 10 days, 13 hours, 40 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story #99, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Harry Strikes While the Iron is Hot"
This story was posted on December 20, 2008. Eight writers contributed to the story, which is 900 words long. Five of the eight writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Dec 20, 2008 11:38 am: Story #99, the last of Five Words Volume IX, is posted! Our mini HP Decameron, or Miameron, has come to an end!
What am I talking about? Back in post #2817, Columbine Fairy made this comment, I'm liking these trio tent tales - it's like a mini HP Decameron! I didn't know what CF meant, asked about it, and Dryleaves supplied this explanation in post #2820, I think CF referred to "Decamerone", by Boccaccio, a collection of short stories held together by a frame story, where a group of people are fleeing from the Black Death and tell each other stories; something like in Canterbury tales or Arabian Nights. Maybe you can call a story collection like that a Decameron?
Then, in post #2822, Julia mentioned, It would be a truly mini Decameron, though, since Decameron means 'ten days' and these stories are told in one night. Perhaps we could alter the name a bit. ('One night' in Greek, anyone) So... I did some research, as I mentioned in post #2823, and found that, "one day" in Greek is "mia mera" (from www*justanswer.com), so our collection is a 'Miameron', I guess!
So... in true Five Words fashion, a collective effort has helped create a wonderful new idea, a 'Miameron'! (at least, I think it’s wonderful!) Thanks Columbine Fairy, Dryleaves, and Julia!
I also just realized that the very first word of our HP Miameron is Harry while the very last word is Voldemort! I know I made a suggestion in post #2983 about how the story could end, but I didn't notice this connection when I made the suggestion. Honest! It only occurred to me when I was figuring out what I was going to write in my post-story comments.
I think these three stories turned out quite well. They work as stories on their own and they flow well together, too, when read one after the other. (I'm going to try and post them all as one story in the following post.)
I know folks are eager to start the next story, the 100th!, in the new thread, Volume X But I think it would be good to share some of our post-story comments first at the end of this thread, either about this story, all 3 stories in the HRH trilogy, or other stories from this thread. I figure, stopping to reflect on what we've done can only help make our future story-writing even better. Don't you think?
The new Volume X thread will be up tomorrow, December 21, by noon Forum time sometime in the afternoon NYC time. I'm going to post some announcements in the Main Forum's Chat and Potty Games threads to try and encourage Five Worders, past and present (and future?), to have a look here and post their thoughts. Hopefully, we'll use up all the threads remaining in this thread. FYI, there was only one post deleted in this whole thread! I think that’'s a Five Words record!
Okay, let the post-story, end-of-thread comments begin!
- Potteraholic, Dec 20, 2008 12:10 pm: I thought it might be good to have an archive of Five Words Stories (Wow! There are 99 of them! Can you believe it?) organized by category, like: HRH Stories, Stories about the Past, Snape Stories, etc. It is a work in progress and will be ready here, in this post, within the week. Stay tuned!
Edit: May 16, 2009 - LOL, I thought the archive I mentioned above would take only a week to put together, but life got in the way! In actuality, it took me five months to get the archive organized!
Click the graphic below if you want to take a look at the Archive of Five Words Stories. As of this edited posting, the archive is still a work-in-progress.
* Five Words Stories Archive *
- Verity Weasley, Dec 20, 2008 1:15 pm: Wow! What a lot of work you've put in PAH. And you've done a brilliant job, as usual. I love the titles, especially for the last one, Harry's story. I also like the new term, miameron. It's always great to be a part of something new. As for the first word of this trilogy being Harry, and the last word Voldemort, that is just spooky!
I enjoyed participating in these stories. It was a little different than usual, and a challenge to tell the story in the appropriate speech patterns of the particular character. I think we did a pretty good job. (Apart from the post countdown, which tripped me up a few times!)
- Columbine Fairy, Dec 21, 2008 6:26 am: G'day, folks! I love our little term for the stories, 'miameron'! I'm sorry I wasn't around to explain my comment about the Decameron, but I think PAH did a good job of it. It was set during the plague, when ten people hid themselves away and each of them told ten stories, hence the title 'Dec'ameron - for a hundred stories. These stories of HRH hiding away in their tent swapping stories seemed like a very similar situation!!
Anyway it was fun to be part of, now looking forward to number 100!!
- Potteraholic, Dec 21, 2008 6:40 am: Verity, thanks for your very kind words! And about the post countdown, don't worry, we don't have to worry about another one for a long while now! Not until the end of Volume X!
CF, thanks for your comments, and re: the explanation of 'Decameron', kudos go to Dryleaves, since she provided the explanation. I just asked the question. I'm just glad that you made the connection between our stories and the original 'Decameron'.
- Julia H., Dec 21, 2008 12:53 pm: Great job indeed, PAH and everyone! It was really interesting to participate in writing a small "collection" of stories this time. I can confess now that I did think of Decameron when I originally suggested the background situation for the three stories but I had no idea that this connection would get so much emphasis in the end - thanks to CF, Dryleaves and PAH. The title "Miameron" is cute. (Let's hope "meron" is not plural in Greek - but even if it is, well, some anonymous Greek lurkers may have some fun, LOL.)
I like the idea of an archive - thanks, PAH, for thinking about it and being willing to do it.
- Dryleaves, Dec 21, 2008 2:20 pm: I really liked this idea of three stories joined by a frame story and a common theme. I think we managed to create the feeling that the stories were told, not written. I especially liked the title of the last story, very much because it gave me the wrong association at first sight. The saying "to strike while the iron is hot" exists in my language too (though we use a word that means "forge" instead of "strike"). To iron (clothes, etc) is called "stryka" in Swedish, so "strike" first made me think of ironing, which was very fitting for this story.
- Kip Carter, Dec 21, 2008 7:46 pm: I applaud each of you who participated in this thread. This particular post by Dryleaves is listed as #2995; however it is actually 2996. That means there were only two (2) posts deleted during the entire 2997 messages used so far. Post #1 is actually #0 (zero); therefore that is why I stated 2997 messages. This shows that each of you are making maximum usage of your posts and posting time. And that is why I applaud you! I hope that makes sense.
Additional Note: Considering that the initial post that starts the thread does not have a number assigned, there have been a total of 2998 messages used with 2996 still existing. That's quite an accomplishment! Thanks! – Kip
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 99
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| Potteraholic | 63 |
| Verity Weasley | 49 |
| mona amon | 3 |
| Julia H. | 16 |
| Columbine Fairy | 7 |
| Dryleaves | 11 |
| Anna L. Black | 4 |
| azi | 27 |
Total Submissions: 180
Total Words: 900
Last Submission Date: #2984, December 18, 2008, 6:12 PM (azi)
Total Time to Create Story: 10 days, 13 hours, 40 minutes
These post-story comments were collected by Potteraholic, but were not posted in a ‘post-story comments post’ before the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum' site closed on April 15, 2011. So they are being posted now, here on forumotion.
Post-Story Comments for Story #99, Volume IX,
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Harry Strikes While the Iron is Hot"
This story was posted on December 20, 2008. Eight writers contributed to the story, which is 900 words long. Five of the eight writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Dec 20, 2008 11:38 am: Story #99, the last of Five Words Volume IX, is posted! Our mini HP Decameron, or Miameron, has come to an end!
What am I talking about? Back in post #2817, Columbine Fairy made this comment, I'm liking these trio tent tales - it's like a mini HP Decameron! I didn't know what CF meant, asked about it, and Dryleaves supplied this explanation in post #2820, I think CF referred to "Decamerone", by Boccaccio, a collection of short stories held together by a frame story, where a group of people are fleeing from the Black Death and tell each other stories; something like in Canterbury tales or Arabian Nights. Maybe you can call a story collection like that a Decameron?
Then, in post #2822, Julia mentioned, It would be a truly mini Decameron, though, since Decameron means 'ten days' and these stories are told in one night. Perhaps we could alter the name a bit. ('One night' in Greek, anyone) So... I did some research, as I mentioned in post #2823, and found that, "one day" in Greek is "mia mera" (from www*justanswer.com), so our collection is a 'Miameron', I guess!
So... in true Five Words fashion, a collective effort has helped create a wonderful new idea, a 'Miameron'! (at least, I think it’s wonderful!) Thanks Columbine Fairy, Dryleaves, and Julia!
I also just realized that the very first word of our HP Miameron is Harry while the very last word is Voldemort! I know I made a suggestion in post #2983 about how the story could end, but I didn't notice this connection when I made the suggestion. Honest! It only occurred to me when I was figuring out what I was going to write in my post-story comments.
I think these three stories turned out quite well. They work as stories on their own and they flow well together, too, when read one after the other. (I'm going to try and post them all as one story in the following post.)
I know folks are eager to start the next story, the 100th!, in the new thread, Volume X But I think it would be good to share some of our post-story comments first at the end of this thread, either about this story, all 3 stories in the HRH trilogy, or other stories from this thread. I figure, stopping to reflect on what we've done can only help make our future story-writing even better. Don't you think?
The new Volume X thread will be up tomorrow, December 21, by noon Forum time sometime in the afternoon NYC time. I'm going to post some announcements in the Main Forum's Chat and Potty Games threads to try and encourage Five Worders, past and present (and future?), to have a look here and post their thoughts. Hopefully, we'll use up all the threads remaining in this thread. FYI, there was only one post deleted in this whole thread! I think that’'s a Five Words record!
Okay, let the post-story, end-of-thread comments begin!
- Potteraholic, Dec 20, 2008 12:10 pm: I thought it might be good to have an archive of Five Words Stories (Wow! There are 99 of them! Can you believe it?) organized by category, like: HRH Stories, Stories about the Past, Snape Stories, etc. It is a work in progress and will be ready here, in this post, within the week. Stay tuned!
Edit: May 16, 2009 - LOL, I thought the archive I mentioned above would take only a week to put together, but life got in the way! In actuality, it took me five months to get the archive organized!
Click the graphic below if you want to take a look at the Archive of Five Words Stories. As of this edited posting, the archive is still a work-in-progress.
* Five Words Stories Archive *
- Verity Weasley, Dec 20, 2008 1:15 pm: Wow! What a lot of work you've put in PAH. And you've done a brilliant job, as usual. I love the titles, especially for the last one, Harry's story. I also like the new term, miameron. It's always great to be a part of something new. As for the first word of this trilogy being Harry, and the last word Voldemort, that is just spooky!
I enjoyed participating in these stories. It was a little different than usual, and a challenge to tell the story in the appropriate speech patterns of the particular character. I think we did a pretty good job. (Apart from the post countdown, which tripped me up a few times!)
- Columbine Fairy, Dec 21, 2008 6:26 am: G'day, folks! I love our little term for the stories, 'miameron'! I'm sorry I wasn't around to explain my comment about the Decameron, but I think PAH did a good job of it. It was set during the plague, when ten people hid themselves away and each of them told ten stories, hence the title 'Dec'ameron - for a hundred stories. These stories of HRH hiding away in their tent swapping stories seemed like a very similar situation!!
Anyway it was fun to be part of, now looking forward to number 100!!
- Potteraholic, Dec 21, 2008 6:40 am: Verity, thanks for your very kind words! And about the post countdown, don't worry, we don't have to worry about another one for a long while now! Not until the end of Volume X!
CF, thanks for your comments, and re: the explanation of 'Decameron', kudos go to Dryleaves, since she provided the explanation. I just asked the question. I'm just glad that you made the connection between our stories and the original 'Decameron'.
- Julia H., Dec 21, 2008 12:53 pm: Great job indeed, PAH and everyone! It was really interesting to participate in writing a small "collection" of stories this time. I can confess now that I did think of Decameron when I originally suggested the background situation for the three stories but I had no idea that this connection would get so much emphasis in the end - thanks to CF, Dryleaves and PAH. The title "Miameron" is cute. (Let's hope "meron" is not plural in Greek - but even if it is, well, some anonymous Greek lurkers may have some fun, LOL.)
I like the idea of an archive - thanks, PAH, for thinking about it and being willing to do it.
- Dryleaves, Dec 21, 2008 2:20 pm: I really liked this idea of three stories joined by a frame story and a common theme. I think we managed to create the feeling that the stories were told, not written. I especially liked the title of the last story, very much because it gave me the wrong association at first sight. The saying "to strike while the iron is hot" exists in my language too (though we use a word that means "forge" instead of "strike"). To iron (clothes, etc) is called "stryka" in Swedish, so "strike" first made me think of ironing, which was very fitting for this story.
- Kip Carter, Dec 21, 2008 7:46 pm: I applaud each of you who participated in this thread. This particular post by Dryleaves is listed as #2995; however it is actually 2996. That means there were only two (2) posts deleted during the entire 2997 messages used so far. Post #1 is actually #0 (zero); therefore that is why I stated 2997 messages. This shows that each of you are making maximum usage of your posts and posting time. And that is why I applaud you! I hope that makes sense.
Additional Note: Considering that the initial post that starts the thread does not have a number assigned, there have been a total of 2998 messages used with 2996 still existing. That's quite an accomplishment! Thanks! – Kip
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Last edited by Potteraholic on Sun Aug 14, 2011 10:16 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume IX, Stories #97, #98, #99 all-in-one
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 1:51 pm
Note: Stories #97, #98, and #99 are all stories told in succession by travelers, in the tradition of Geoffrey Chaucer's The Canterbury Tales. He, in turn, followed the older tradition of decameron started in the 12th century by by Giovanni Boccaccio, who had 100 tales in his collection. The "Tales of HRH: A Miameron" are only 3 stories told in one day, not 100. So we coined a new term here at Five Words - miameron from the Greek: one day → μία ημέρα (mía i̱méra)
Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat in the tent listening to the crackling of the fire that Hermione had conjured. None of them spoke. The silence made Ron uneasy and he decided to break it. "This is just creepy. Can't you two stop thinking about those horcruxes?" he said. "How about doing something enjoyable for a change?"
"We're on the run, aren't we?" Harry answered.
Hermione sighed. "Ron, the Death Eaters are killing people at this moment and you want to enjoy yourself? Really! You need to think..."
"Would it hurt anyone if we talked about something else?" Ron asked.
"Would you like a bedtime story, for example?"
"Bedtime story? Why not?" Ron said with a grin. "It's been a long time since I heard one. Please, Hermione, tell me something entertaining about Muggles. They are so funny!"
"They aren't, but I can tell you a story about the time my cousin Lizzy and I were trying to catch some butterflies." Harry looked at Ron and grinned, remembering the time they had been following the spiders in their second year.
"Butterflies are pretty harmless. That should be a nice, soothing bedtime story, shouldn't it?" said Harry, chuckling.
"Yeah, better than spiders!" Ron said.
"Don't be too sure," said Hermione grimly. "It was quite an adventure, actually. Lizzy and I were camping with my parents when she woke me up one morning with a plan to catch a squirrel she had noticed the day before."
"A squirrel?" Ron interrupted, "I thought you said butterflies!"
"Yes, Ron," Hermione continued patiently. "I'm getting to that. Anyway, we went out and were waiting in a field, near a large hedgerow. We sat there quite a while. We were six years old at that time and didn't like to sit still, so when the squirrel turned up, we laid chase immediately. Soon we came to a—"
"What was so special about that squirrel, anyway?" asked Harry.
"Nothing really," Hermione said. "Lizzy liked it. But we never found it."
Harry caught Ron's eye and gave him a conspiratorial look. "Go on, let's hear more about this non-existent squirrel."
They inched towards the fire, and Hermione continued her story, trying to remember where she had stopped. "While we were running, we spotted a flock of butterflies fluttering nearby. Lizzy wanted to catch one. 'Look at all the pretty colors,' she said, and she dove towards them instead! Suddenly, the ground under her feet gave way, and she fell down some sort of old mineshaft. We had wandered quite far from our tent and nobody heard me when I tried to call for help. I didn't hesitate much. As far as I could see there was only one thing to do."
Ron cried, "You Summoned a ladder and climbed down?"
"She was six, Ron," Harry said. "She didn't even know she was a witch. And she had no wand."
"That's right, Harry," Hermione continued a little impatiently. "I simply clambered down after her. It was difficult, because the shaft sloped down rather steeply, but I made it, safe, and sound, and found Lizzy at the bottom. She was crying but was not hurt. We looked around for something we could use to get out, but it was dark and gloomy. Luckily, some broken ladders happened to be lying around. I found them while stumbling around in the dark, wishing I had some light. Suddenly, a flash of light came from nowhere. It was incredible."
"Wait a minute!" Ron interjected. "So, you conjured a light down there in the tunnel? Didn't you think it was... strange?"
"I was too busy worrying about getting us out of there! We tried to use the broken ladders, but they were too dilapidated. I was wishing desperately for some help but no one heard our cries and I thought we'd be stuck there forever. Then I noticed that Lizzy was sitting on something that very much resembled a coil of rope..."
"Didn't Lizzy notice it first?" Ron asked incredulously.
"No. Well, she swears it wasn't a rope when she was sitting on it, but a rock instead."
Harry smiled. "Poor Lizzy! She must've been so confused: rock one minute, rope the next!"
Hermione chuckled, "Yeah. She jumped up and stared at it in astonishment. Anyway, I made a loop at one end, and we managed to hook it over a tree stump after several attempts. Then we started climbing out, which was easy with the rope to hold on to."
"You were really lucky that the rope was there!" Ron exclaimed.
"I don't think it was just lying there. I think Hermione did magic without knowing it," Harry said.
"Yes, Ron, weren't you listening?" Hermione said. "And I think—"
"Don't you remember, she told us about the mysterious light?" Harry interrupted. "And then the rope appeared unexpectedly? That's like when I somehow grew my hair back every time Petunia cut it."
"Yes, Ron," Hermione continued, "It must have been child magic, which I didn't realize at the time. I had no idea I was a witch. We were young and thought... well, that things like this just happened. Children, even Muggle ones, often believe in magic. But I thought it strange that those things happened so close together. When I received my Hogwarts letter, it started to make sense."
Harry nodded and said, "I know what you mean. Lots of things started making sense after I learned I was a wizard."
Ron looked at Hermione and said, "That was quite some story. But did you ever catch those butterflies?"
"No!" Hermione smiled, "They got away. Just like we did."
The fire crackled as Ron sat staring into the flames. "I always knew I was a wizard."
"You could've been a Squib," Hermione said.
"Yeah," Ron nodded, "Mum and Dad are both pure-bloods so it would've been weird to be the only non-magical Weasley, wouldn't it? But there wasn't much danger of that. Ginny and I proved our magical talents at a very young age."
"You did?" Harry asked. "How come you couldn't turn Scabbers yellow, then?"
"I was trying to but the spell was fake, remember? Fred and George tried to make me look like a fool."
There was a silence as Harry and Hermione thought back to that day and both avoided confirming the plan's success.
"So," Harry said to break the silence, "what did you and Ginny do to show your magical skills? Ginny's never told me anything about it."
"Nor me," Hermione said.
"Well," Ron began, "We must've been about five, and we were playing in—"
"Wait, who was five? You were older than Ginny, weren't you?" Hermione queried.
"Obviously," Ron answered, rolling his eyes. "I meant that I was five. Anyway, we were in the kitchen and there was this huge pot of boiling water. Mum's attention was distracted by the garden gnomes being chased around the yard by Charlie on his broom. Ginny came over to me with her toy broomstick in her hands and asked if I wanted to play Quidditch with her."
"Let me guess," said Hermione, giggling. "You burnt the whole kitchen down?"
"No," Ron replied with a chuckle. "Ginny wanted to show off her broomstick skills, so she got on her broom and started to fly in circles over the kitchen table. She wasn't watching where she was going, so the tail of her broom pushed the pot of water off the stove right over me."
"You got boiling water all over you?" exclaimed Hermione.
"No," answered Ron, "the water just stopped in mid-air, centimeters from my head, and sort of waterfalled over me", he explained, as Hermione gasped in horror.
"Who stopped the water?" Harry asked with interest. He looked a little too concerned, Ron thought.
"I did," he shrugged. "Then, Mum came in and started going mad because she thought I was hurt. When she found out I was all right, she quickly changed her tune."
"I wouldn't blame her," said Hermione.
"Blame her for what?" Ron asked.
"For almost going mad," Hermione answered.
"What happened to Ginny?" Harry asked with greater interest. Ron grinned. "She flew out of the window. She was so afraid, that her toy broomstick flew like a real one. Mum was torn between anger at us both and worry over Ginny's safety. I think she was secretly happy that we actually possessed some magical ability."
"It must be like a Muggle mother seeing her child take their first steps," said Hermione, suddenly wistful. No one spoke for a few minutes; Hermione was thinking about her own parents, while Harry pictured his mum and dad as they had looked as young, happy parents.
Ron suddenly broke the silence. "Anyway, that's the first time I remember Ginny or me using magic, but Fred and George were doing accidental spells before they could hold a wand."
"Somehow I'm not surprised," Harry laughed, picturing Fred and George as ginger-headed toddlers, exploding things around the house and generally causing mayhem.
"Yeah, they were always getting into trouble, even before they went to Hogwarts," Ron grinned. "They always tried to practice on me. Bill and Charlie looked out for me, but there was only so much they could do. Well, at least I survived..."
"You weren't turned into something horrible, thankfully," Hermione sighed.
"Not that they didn't try," Ron complained. "I had a tail for a week after they "borrowed" Great Auntie Muriel's wand and tested a spell on me. It took Dad that long to figure out how to get rid of it."
"What sort of tail?" Harry asked, remembering Dudley's curly pig's tail.
"It was long and scaly, sort of like a lizard's. Mum was furious! The thing is, Fred and George's tricks had been much less polished then. They couldn't remember exactly what they said. That was why it took so long. Dad didn't want to make things worse. And Auntie Muriel's wand always was a bit unpredictable. Ever since then, I've had a healthy respect for Fred and George's abilities."
"It's different when you're an only child," said Hermione. "There's no one to bother or play tricks on you and you must play alone most of the time. I think you're lucky to have brothers."
Harry nodded in agreement. "And a sister. Let's not forget her either...” He sighed.
"Ginny was lucky. Fred and George used me as a guinea pig—"
"You already mentioned that," Harry said. "Dudley used me as a punching bag — or at least he tried to — but I usually managed to get away."
They sat around the fire, watching the dancing flames. "You're lucky though. You grew up with laughter," Harry said.
"Well, that's true, I suppose, but Mum wasn't laughing much the day I sprouted a striped, green tail! That was the first time I heard her swear!"
"What did she say?" asked Hermione with a giggle, "Merlin's pants?"
"No, er... I'd better not repeat it. You don't know her... She really knows how to express her feelings... precisely."
"We'll have to take your word for it, then," Harry said smiling. He was trying to enjoy the moment, one of the few happy ones the three friends had shared in the last months.
"You certainly kept that tail a secret," Hermione teased. Ron grinned sheepishly. "Wonder how many more tails to tell before sunrise."
Hermione looked over at Harry. He was gazing into the fire with a thoughtful air. "It's my turn to stand watch," Harry announced. "You two should get some sleep. We'll have to work again tomorrow."
"Hang on," said Ron. "We'd like to hear a story from you first. We've both told one. It's your turn now."
Ron and Hermione were looking at him expectantly. He didn't want to disappoint them so he took his time to think about something he hadn't told them before. I didn't have a happy childhood, so a cheerful story is out of the question. I could tell them about the time Dudley and his gang tried to shove me into the garden shed. Harry's thoughts searched his past. When had that happened?
"Oi, Harry! We're waiting!" Ron remarked impatiently. Harry shrugged his shoulders and said, "Well, if you insist. I was trying to remember the first time I did magic without realizing it. I think I was about five or six. It was the summer and it was Dudley's birthday. As soon as I went into the kitchen, Aunt Petunia tried to get me out by telling me to go and iron Dudley's best jacket so he could wear it at breakfast."
"What?" Hermione exclaimed indignantly. "You were made to use a hot iron?! That's dangerous!"
"Well, obviously Aunt Petunia wasn't too concerned if I got hurt, even at that age," Harry said.
"You could've burnt the house down, mate!" Ron said. "Maybe she'd've cared then, the miserable old bat!"
"Well," Harry said, "though I could barely lift the thing, I got the iron and took it into the lounge. Aunt Petunia had already set up the ironing board."
"How were you, a little boy, expected to reach the ironing board?" asked an incredulous Hermione.
"Aunt Petunia had very thoughtfully placed a chair alongside it so I could reach," explained Harry. "But as you might expect, it was tricky getting the iron plugged in and set to the right temperature. Anyway, I dragged Dudley's jacket across the floor, then put it on the table while—"
"Muggle ironing sounds complicated," Ron interrupted. "Mum always just does it with magic."
"Of course she does," said Hermione impatiently, "she's a witch, Ron! Honestly!"
Harry decided to intervene before she and Ron started bickering. "Anyway, I'd put it down on the table to smooth it out and suddenly the iron started to hiss loudly. Steam was pouring out of it, so I quickly climbed on the chair to stop it. I frantically turned its dial round, but then slipped off the wobbly chair, knocking the iron onto the carpet! It was so hot that it burnt a hole straight through to the bare floor. I grabbed Dudley's jacket and put it on the couch, looking around for something I could use to pick up the hot iron. Dudley's jacket was the only thing within reach so I decided to take my chances and—"
"You used the jacket to pick up the iron? Were you mental?" Ron asked with an incredulous look.
"I was panicking and I was a kid," Harry protested. "I wasn't thinking. It was a new carpet and the burn was in a prominent place. Aunt Petunia wouldn't have been able to miss it. She'd've really gone mental! Anyway, the jacket didn't help, as the iron was so hot it melted the fabric and it stuck to the carpet! By this point, the carpet was starting to smoke and a horrible smell was filling the room. I was on the verge of calling for help when I realized Aunt Petunia would probably kill me!"
"You poor thing!" Hermione said sympathetically. "What did you do then?"
"I unplugged the iron to cool it down and grabbed a vase from the windowsill. In my haste I forgot that it didn't have any water in it... artificial flowers, you see," Harry said with a bitter smile, remembering his life then.
"Never mind," Hermione said consolingly. "What did you do?"
"I just panicked and put my hand over the burn. I guess I hoped the Dursleys wouldn't notice. I couldn't believe what happened next, though. I was desperately hoping that the burn would just disappear and that somehow the jacket would be restored and come loose from the carpet. Then I felt something strange. It was as if the carpet was rapidly stretching under my fingertips. I slowly lifted my hand and—"
"The burn was gone?" asked Ron, excitedly.
Harry nodded solemnly. "That's right," he said, with a shrug. "I don't know how it happened, but the jacket was also mended! I picked it up and saw that all the melted fabric was gone. It looked like a brand new jacket!"
"So you did magic?" Hermione asked.
"Yes, but I didn't realize at the time, obviously," Harry said. "I didn't have the faintest idea how it happened. I was just relieved that everything was back to normal. Aunt Petunia came in and yelled at me for taking so long, so I showed her Dudley's crisply pressed jacket. She looked astounded and stood there dumbstruck. Then she shrugged, grabbed the jacket and left."
"Without even thanking you? That's awfully rude," said Hermione, frowning. "It's amazing how you turned out so nice after all the things those horrible people did to you!"
Harry thought, The Dursleys were bad, but they were no Voldemort.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Hermione Remembers When..."
Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat in the tent listening to the crackling of the fire that Hermione had conjured. None of them spoke. The silence made Ron uneasy and he decided to break it. "This is just creepy. Can't you two stop thinking about those horcruxes?" he said. "How about doing something enjoyable for a change?"
"We're on the run, aren't we?" Harry answered.
Hermione sighed. "Ron, the Death Eaters are killing people at this moment and you want to enjoy yourself? Really! You need to think..."
"Would it hurt anyone if we talked about something else?" Ron asked.
"Would you like a bedtime story, for example?"
"Bedtime story? Why not?" Ron said with a grin. "It's been a long time since I heard one. Please, Hermione, tell me something entertaining about Muggles. They are so funny!"
"They aren't, but I can tell you a story about the time my cousin Lizzy and I were trying to catch some butterflies." Harry looked at Ron and grinned, remembering the time they had been following the spiders in their second year.
"Butterflies are pretty harmless. That should be a nice, soothing bedtime story, shouldn't it?" said Harry, chuckling.
"Yeah, better than spiders!" Ron said.
"Don't be too sure," said Hermione grimly. "It was quite an adventure, actually. Lizzy and I were camping with my parents when she woke me up one morning with a plan to catch a squirrel she had noticed the day before."
"A squirrel?" Ron interrupted, "I thought you said butterflies!"
"Yes, Ron," Hermione continued patiently. "I'm getting to that. Anyway, we went out and were waiting in a field, near a large hedgerow. We sat there quite a while. We were six years old at that time and didn't like to sit still, so when the squirrel turned up, we laid chase immediately. Soon we came to a—"
"What was so special about that squirrel, anyway?" asked Harry.
"Nothing really," Hermione said. "Lizzy liked it. But we never found it."
Harry caught Ron's eye and gave him a conspiratorial look. "Go on, let's hear more about this non-existent squirrel."
They inched towards the fire, and Hermione continued her story, trying to remember where she had stopped. "While we were running, we spotted a flock of butterflies fluttering nearby. Lizzy wanted to catch one. 'Look at all the pretty colors,' she said, and she dove towards them instead! Suddenly, the ground under her feet gave way, and she fell down some sort of old mineshaft. We had wandered quite far from our tent and nobody heard me when I tried to call for help. I didn't hesitate much. As far as I could see there was only one thing to do."
Ron cried, "You Summoned a ladder and climbed down?"
"She was six, Ron," Harry said. "She didn't even know she was a witch. And she had no wand."
"That's right, Harry," Hermione continued a little impatiently. "I simply clambered down after her. It was difficult, because the shaft sloped down rather steeply, but I made it, safe, and sound, and found Lizzy at the bottom. She was crying but was not hurt. We looked around for something we could use to get out, but it was dark and gloomy. Luckily, some broken ladders happened to be lying around. I found them while stumbling around in the dark, wishing I had some light. Suddenly, a flash of light came from nowhere. It was incredible."
"Wait a minute!" Ron interjected. "So, you conjured a light down there in the tunnel? Didn't you think it was... strange?"
"I was too busy worrying about getting us out of there! We tried to use the broken ladders, but they were too dilapidated. I was wishing desperately for some help but no one heard our cries and I thought we'd be stuck there forever. Then I noticed that Lizzy was sitting on something that very much resembled a coil of rope..."
"Didn't Lizzy notice it first?" Ron asked incredulously.
"No. Well, she swears it wasn't a rope when she was sitting on it, but a rock instead."
Harry smiled. "Poor Lizzy! She must've been so confused: rock one minute, rope the next!"
Hermione chuckled, "Yeah. She jumped up and stared at it in astonishment. Anyway, I made a loop at one end, and we managed to hook it over a tree stump after several attempts. Then we started climbing out, which was easy with the rope to hold on to."
"You were really lucky that the rope was there!" Ron exclaimed.
"I don't think it was just lying there. I think Hermione did magic without knowing it," Harry said.
"Yes, Ron, weren't you listening?" Hermione said. "And I think—"
"Don't you remember, she told us about the mysterious light?" Harry interrupted. "And then the rope appeared unexpectedly? That's like when I somehow grew my hair back every time Petunia cut it."
"Yes, Ron," Hermione continued, "It must have been child magic, which I didn't realize at the time. I had no idea I was a witch. We were young and thought... well, that things like this just happened. Children, even Muggle ones, often believe in magic. But I thought it strange that those things happened so close together. When I received my Hogwarts letter, it started to make sense."
Harry nodded and said, "I know what you mean. Lots of things started making sense after I learned I was a wizard."
Ron looked at Hermione and said, "That was quite some story. But did you ever catch those butterflies?"
"No!" Hermione smiled, "They got away. Just like we did."
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Ron’s Long-Held Secret"
The fire crackled as Ron sat staring into the flames. "I always knew I was a wizard."
"You could've been a Squib," Hermione said.
"Yeah," Ron nodded, "Mum and Dad are both pure-bloods so it would've been weird to be the only non-magical Weasley, wouldn't it? But there wasn't much danger of that. Ginny and I proved our magical talents at a very young age."
"You did?" Harry asked. "How come you couldn't turn Scabbers yellow, then?"
"I was trying to but the spell was fake, remember? Fred and George tried to make me look like a fool."
There was a silence as Harry and Hermione thought back to that day and both avoided confirming the plan's success.
"So," Harry said to break the silence, "what did you and Ginny do to show your magical skills? Ginny's never told me anything about it."
"Nor me," Hermione said.
"Well," Ron began, "We must've been about five, and we were playing in—"
"Wait, who was five? You were older than Ginny, weren't you?" Hermione queried.
"Obviously," Ron answered, rolling his eyes. "I meant that I was five. Anyway, we were in the kitchen and there was this huge pot of boiling water. Mum's attention was distracted by the garden gnomes being chased around the yard by Charlie on his broom. Ginny came over to me with her toy broomstick in her hands and asked if I wanted to play Quidditch with her."
"Let me guess," said Hermione, giggling. "You burnt the whole kitchen down?"
"No," Ron replied with a chuckle. "Ginny wanted to show off her broomstick skills, so she got on her broom and started to fly in circles over the kitchen table. She wasn't watching where she was going, so the tail of her broom pushed the pot of water off the stove right over me."
"You got boiling water all over you?" exclaimed Hermione.
"No," answered Ron, "the water just stopped in mid-air, centimeters from my head, and sort of waterfalled over me", he explained, as Hermione gasped in horror.
"Who stopped the water?" Harry asked with interest. He looked a little too concerned, Ron thought.
"I did," he shrugged. "Then, Mum came in and started going mad because she thought I was hurt. When she found out I was all right, she quickly changed her tune."
"I wouldn't blame her," said Hermione.
"Blame her for what?" Ron asked.
"For almost going mad," Hermione answered.
"What happened to Ginny?" Harry asked with greater interest. Ron grinned. "She flew out of the window. She was so afraid, that her toy broomstick flew like a real one. Mum was torn between anger at us both and worry over Ginny's safety. I think she was secretly happy that we actually possessed some magical ability."
"It must be like a Muggle mother seeing her child take their first steps," said Hermione, suddenly wistful. No one spoke for a few minutes; Hermione was thinking about her own parents, while Harry pictured his mum and dad as they had looked as young, happy parents.
Ron suddenly broke the silence. "Anyway, that's the first time I remember Ginny or me using magic, but Fred and George were doing accidental spells before they could hold a wand."
"Somehow I'm not surprised," Harry laughed, picturing Fred and George as ginger-headed toddlers, exploding things around the house and generally causing mayhem.
"Yeah, they were always getting into trouble, even before they went to Hogwarts," Ron grinned. "They always tried to practice on me. Bill and Charlie looked out for me, but there was only so much they could do. Well, at least I survived..."
"You weren't turned into something horrible, thankfully," Hermione sighed.
"Not that they didn't try," Ron complained. "I had a tail for a week after they "borrowed" Great Auntie Muriel's wand and tested a spell on me. It took Dad that long to figure out how to get rid of it."
"What sort of tail?" Harry asked, remembering Dudley's curly pig's tail.
"It was long and scaly, sort of like a lizard's. Mum was furious! The thing is, Fred and George's tricks had been much less polished then. They couldn't remember exactly what they said. That was why it took so long. Dad didn't want to make things worse. And Auntie Muriel's wand always was a bit unpredictable. Ever since then, I've had a healthy respect for Fred and George's abilities."
"It's different when you're an only child," said Hermione. "There's no one to bother or play tricks on you and you must play alone most of the time. I think you're lucky to have brothers."
Harry nodded in agreement. "And a sister. Let's not forget her either...” He sighed.
"Ginny was lucky. Fred and George used me as a guinea pig—"
"You already mentioned that," Harry said. "Dudley used me as a punching bag — or at least he tried to — but I usually managed to get away."
They sat around the fire, watching the dancing flames. "You're lucky though. You grew up with laughter," Harry said.
"Well, that's true, I suppose, but Mum wasn't laughing much the day I sprouted a striped, green tail! That was the first time I heard her swear!"
"What did she say?" asked Hermione with a giggle, "Merlin's pants?"
"No, er... I'd better not repeat it. You don't know her... She really knows how to express her feelings... precisely."
"We'll have to take your word for it, then," Harry said smiling. He was trying to enjoy the moment, one of the few happy ones the three friends had shared in the last months.
"You certainly kept that tail a secret," Hermione teased. Ron grinned sheepishly. "Wonder how many more tails to tell before sunrise."
Potty Five Words: "Tales of HRH: Harry Strikes While the Iron is Hot"
Hermione looked over at Harry. He was gazing into the fire with a thoughtful air. "It's my turn to stand watch," Harry announced. "You two should get some sleep. We'll have to work again tomorrow."
"Hang on," said Ron. "We'd like to hear a story from you first. We've both told one. It's your turn now."
Ron and Hermione were looking at him expectantly. He didn't want to disappoint them so he took his time to think about something he hadn't told them before. I didn't have a happy childhood, so a cheerful story is out of the question. I could tell them about the time Dudley and his gang tried to shove me into the garden shed. Harry's thoughts searched his past. When had that happened?
"Oi, Harry! We're waiting!" Ron remarked impatiently. Harry shrugged his shoulders and said, "Well, if you insist. I was trying to remember the first time I did magic without realizing it. I think I was about five or six. It was the summer and it was Dudley's birthday. As soon as I went into the kitchen, Aunt Petunia tried to get me out by telling me to go and iron Dudley's best jacket so he could wear it at breakfast."
"What?" Hermione exclaimed indignantly. "You were made to use a hot iron?! That's dangerous!"
"Well, obviously Aunt Petunia wasn't too concerned if I got hurt, even at that age," Harry said.
"You could've burnt the house down, mate!" Ron said. "Maybe she'd've cared then, the miserable old bat!"
"Well," Harry said, "though I could barely lift the thing, I got the iron and took it into the lounge. Aunt Petunia had already set up the ironing board."
"How were you, a little boy, expected to reach the ironing board?" asked an incredulous Hermione.
"Aunt Petunia had very thoughtfully placed a chair alongside it so I could reach," explained Harry. "But as you might expect, it was tricky getting the iron plugged in and set to the right temperature. Anyway, I dragged Dudley's jacket across the floor, then put it on the table while—"
"Muggle ironing sounds complicated," Ron interrupted. "Mum always just does it with magic."
"Of course she does," said Hermione impatiently, "she's a witch, Ron! Honestly!"
Harry decided to intervene before she and Ron started bickering. "Anyway, I'd put it down on the table to smooth it out and suddenly the iron started to hiss loudly. Steam was pouring out of it, so I quickly climbed on the chair to stop it. I frantically turned its dial round, but then slipped off the wobbly chair, knocking the iron onto the carpet! It was so hot that it burnt a hole straight through to the bare floor. I grabbed Dudley's jacket and put it on the couch, looking around for something I could use to pick up the hot iron. Dudley's jacket was the only thing within reach so I decided to take my chances and—"
"You used the jacket to pick up the iron? Were you mental?" Ron asked with an incredulous look.
"I was panicking and I was a kid," Harry protested. "I wasn't thinking. It was a new carpet and the burn was in a prominent place. Aunt Petunia wouldn't have been able to miss it. She'd've really gone mental! Anyway, the jacket didn't help, as the iron was so hot it melted the fabric and it stuck to the carpet! By this point, the carpet was starting to smoke and a horrible smell was filling the room. I was on the verge of calling for help when I realized Aunt Petunia would probably kill me!"
"You poor thing!" Hermione said sympathetically. "What did you do then?"
"I unplugged the iron to cool it down and grabbed a vase from the windowsill. In my haste I forgot that it didn't have any water in it... artificial flowers, you see," Harry said with a bitter smile, remembering his life then.
"Never mind," Hermione said consolingly. "What did you do?"
"I just panicked and put my hand over the burn. I guess I hoped the Dursleys wouldn't notice. I couldn't believe what happened next, though. I was desperately hoping that the burn would just disappear and that somehow the jacket would be restored and come loose from the carpet. Then I felt something strange. It was as if the carpet was rapidly stretching under my fingertips. I slowly lifted my hand and—"
"The burn was gone?" asked Ron, excitedly.
Harry nodded solemnly. "That's right," he said, with a shrug. "I don't know how it happened, but the jacket was also mended! I picked it up and saw that all the melted fabric was gone. It looked like a brand new jacket!"
"So you did magic?" Hermione asked.
"Yes, but I didn't realize at the time, obviously," Harry said. "I didn't have the faintest idea how it happened. I was just relieved that everything was back to normal. Aunt Petunia came in and yelled at me for taking so long, so I showed her Dudley's crisply pressed jacket. She looked astounded and stood there dumbstruck. Then she shrugged, grabbed the jacket and left."
"Without even thanking you? That's awfully rude," said Hermione, frowning. "It's amazing how you turned out so nice after all the things those horrible people did to you!"
Harry thought, The Dursleys were bad, but they were no Voldemort.
* Five Words – Volume 9 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Thu Aug 11, 2011 10:09 am; edited 2 times in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X Index
Potteraholic Sun Aug 07, 2011 2:51 pm
This page contains a list with links to all the stories written in Volume X.
Five Words Stories - Volume X
• Click on Story #100 (9 January 2009) for "A Christmas Eve Surprise", The 100th Story!
• Click on Story #101 (29 January 2009) for "Rita Buzzes Around”
• Click on Story #102 (22 February 2009) for "Dean and Seamus 'Roar' into Greece”
• Click on Story #103 (20 March 2009) for "Malevolent Machinations”
• Click on Story #104 (25 March 2009) for "Driving and Disapparation to... Destination, Unknown”
• Click on Story #105 (2 April 2009) for "Lorcan d'Eath's Magical Plot”
• Click on Story #106 (19 April 2009) for "Tales of the Easter Niffler”
• Click on Story #107 (29 April 2009) for "A Blossoming Magic”
• Click on Story #108 (14 May 2009) for "On 'The Cusp'“
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
* This volume's stories, stats and post-story comments archived from WX by Verity Weasley; formatted/posted by Potteraholic
Five Words Stories - Volume X
• Click on Story #100 (9 January 2009) for "A Christmas Eve Surprise", The 100th Story!
• Click on Story #101 (29 January 2009) for "Rita Buzzes Around”
• Click on Story #102 (22 February 2009) for "Dean and Seamus 'Roar' into Greece”
• Click on Story #103 (20 March 2009) for "Malevolent Machinations”
• Click on Story #104 (25 March 2009) for "Driving and Disapparation to... Destination, Unknown”
• Click on Story #105 (2 April 2009) for "Lorcan d'Eath's Magical Plot”
• Click on Story #106 (19 April 2009) for "Tales of the Easter Niffler”
• Click on Story #107 (29 April 2009) for "A Blossoming Magic”
• Click on Story #108 (14 May 2009) for "On 'The Cusp'“
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
* This volume's stories, stats and post-story comments archived from WX by Verity Weasley; formatted/posted by Potteraholic
Last edited by Potteraholic on Wed Aug 10, 2011 11:03 pm; edited 2 times in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #100
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 10:47 am
This story was first posted by Potteraholic - Jan 9, 2009 9:38 pm (#417 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Lily, James, and baby Harry were covered with snow. Christmas festivities were in full swing in Godric's Hollow. The church was festooned with small, twinkly lights and a huge wreath hung outside its stained glass window. Lily was surreptitiously melting a large pile of snow that covered a small statue in the graveyard. It was her favorite, a marble fawn gazing towards the heavens.
"Ma-ma," gurgled baby Harry, as he pulled firmly on her hair. Lily gently disentangled his fingers and waved her wand, making a snowball levitate to distract him. Harry followed the hovering, frozen orb closely, squealing with delight as it zoomed around.
"Look at how he follows the snowball!" James exclaimed. "He's going to be a Seeker for the England team, I think."
"Now James," Lily laughed, "I don't want Harry risking his life playing that game!"
James looked suddenly thoughtful. "I wonder where Padfoot and Moony are tonight. I thought they'd be here by now. The church service is nearly over."
In the shadows by the bell tower, two figures emerged. The snow muffled the sound of their footsteps.
"Prongs!" exclaimed a grinning Sirius. He headed straight for baby Harry. "There's my godson!” Lily smiled as Harry giggled. Sirius lifted the baby in the air, chuckling as the boy shrieked gleefully.
Remus clapped James on the shoulder. His face was tired but joyful. "Happy Christmas to you both. We should go inside," Remus suggested. "Poor Harry almost looks like a miniature snowman." Lily wrapped her cloak tightly around the baby and headed towards the entrance to the church.
"No dogs allowed I'm afraid, Padfoot," James teased.
"And great big bucks like you belong outdoors as well," replied Sirius, winking at Lily and leading the way through the heavy wooden doors. James held it open for Lily, with little Harry babbling in her arms.
The group made their way as quietly as they could to the last pew. "I don't see her," James said, squinting through the crowd.
"Bathilda's getting on a bit," Lily whispered. "Maybe she forgot, poor dear. Just like that time when she was supposed to bring round the highchair for Harry and instead she brought the bag of dungbombs?"
James chuckled, "Good point. Maybe we should—"
"Hey! Isn't that her, over there?" whispered Remus, pointing at a small woman hunched over a small, crumbling snowman. When she turned around, she caught sight of Lily and waved enthusiastically.
"She's outside!" Lily said, pointing at an open door that they hadn't noticed before. "She must've been waiting for us on the other side of the church the whole time."
Remus leaned across James and whispered conspiratorially, "We need to get back outside before Sirius starts singing! He's got off-key down to an art," he chuckled.
"Oi! I heard that!" yelled Sirius.
"Shhh," admonished James. "We're in a church." He tried to look stern, but, almost immediately, broke into a grin. They went out the moment the service ended. Bathilda was waiting for them by the snowman, now decorated with gleaming buttons and a wizard's hat.
Suddenly, a gust of wind blew, lifting the patched hat into the air. Lily used a Summoning spell to retrieve it, just as the rest of the congregation came spilling out into the park.
"Bathlida!" Lily called, smiling. "There you are. Let's get back to our house and have some mulled wine."
James shook his head. "No, Lily, remember? There's a chance that Dumbledore will come by for a visit, and I could really use some of his advice on what color to paint the kitchen. He's a really good person to ask, don't you think?"
Lily looked at James with suspicion. "We only decorated last year James. Why do we need to paint again?" asked Lily.
"Harry—"
"Hang on," Lily continued. "Why don't we just go to Bathilda's house? We can sort out your decorating issues later." James nodded, glancing at Sirius, who winked discreetly.
"Yes!" Bathilda said enthusiastically. "I baked some pumpkin shortbread. I'll put the kettle on so we can have some tea."
The group started trudging through the snow. Bathilda whistled cheerfully, happy to have some company on Christmas Eve. The six of them had reached Bathilda's just as the jingling of bells sounded overhead. They all looked up as a sleigh glided above the rooftops.
A large barn owl approached clutching a tightly rolled scroll. The message, bearing the Hogwarts crest, was addressed to Bathilda. "It's from Albus," she announced. They all squeezed through the doorway, in a hurry to warm up, and clustered around the roaring blaze Bathilda conjured in the fireplace. She unrolled Dumbledore's letter and began reading:
Dear Batty,
Thank you for the wonderful tome Being Brilliant: Staying Stylish. It is a wonderful book and I've had a delightful time reading the intricate sewing patterns suggested for fashionable pairs of socks! Regrettably however, I must decline your generous invitation to the New Year's Eve Dinner you’re holding. I have an unexpected, yet important, matter to attend to. I hope that you have a splendid time and good health in the coming year.
Yours always,
Albus
James exchanged glances with Sirius, Remus, and Lily. He wondered what unexpected event Dumbledore had to deal with. Bathilda left the room and Lily turned to James with a worried expression. "You're not going to pull some dangerous stunt, are you?" she whispered. The clatter of dishes in the kitchen made whispering unnecessary.
"Bathilda won't mind us," said James. "I asked her to brew her special mulled wine so that’ll keep her busy."
A barking laugh filled the room as Sirius turned to see Harry with his hand outstretched, trying to smack the rat which had just scuttled along the floor of the living room. Lily had put him down so he could crawl around. "Oi! Wormtail! Is that you?"
The ugly creature stopped and stood on its hind feet before growing very rapidly and morphing into the shape of a shifty-looking Peter Pettigrew. He looked at his friends and faked a smile. "Umm, hi everyone. Surprise!" There was a brief silence, quickly broken by Harry's wailing, as he started moving away from Peter.
"Don't cry, Harry," cooed Lily, stooping to pick him up. "It's only Peter."
"Here. Come to your favorite godfather," Sirius suggested, smiling broadly. Harry beamed and stretched out his arms for Sirius, who lifted his godson high above his head.
Bathilda re-entered carrying a tray of glasses and shortbread. She looked at Peter and sneered. "Hello, Peter. I see you have entered my home without knocking and have skulked about, as usual." The tension in the room was as thick as congealed porridge, broken only by little Harry, who giggled in delight as Sirius tickled him.
"What are you doing here, Wormtail?" Remus asked. "We weren't expecting you tonight."
Peter blinked rapidly, his watery eyes darting sheepishly toward Bathilda. "Well, I wanted to bring Harry's Christmas present right over," he said, eyeing James meaningfully. "I left it under the tree," Peter finished.
"Well then, why don't we head back to our house so Harry can open his present," James suggested.
Lily looked stern, "We must have Christmas drinks with Bathilda first, like we promised."
James glanced at Peter then sat down. He was anxious to show Lily the surprise he had organized, but he didn't want to be rude. "Right. Drinks."
Bathilda bustled around, serving everyone and "accidentally" spilling some hot wine on Peter. He jumped up quickly, pulling his wand out of his pocket and mopping up the spill. "Never get Bathilda mad at you,” Peter began. “Last summer I accidentally left my broomstick on her floor and she tripped over it. She turned me into a ferret."
Sirius laughed heartily. Peter looked sulky. Lily decided to move things along.
"Harry's tired. He needs to get to bed."
Soon everyone was headed out Bathilda's front door, with Remus leading the way. James carried Harry, all bundled up in the blanket Lily's mother had knitted when Lily was expecting. They turned the corner and saw a magnificent sight: in front of their house stood Petunia looking cold and uncomfortable with the situation.
"Tuney?" whispered Lily in disbelief.
"Who's that?" asked Sirius, quietly.
"My sister," Lily answered automatically, moving quickly toward her. It was only then she saw that Petunia was crying, her tears glistening in the glow from the fairylights, which hung on the Potter's front door and windows. "Are you okay?" Lily asked her, squeezing her sister's hands, reassuringly.
Petunia blinked her eyes and mumbled, "Can we speak privately?"
"Of course," Lily replied, "come into the back garden." The others turned to go inside. James looked back at Lily and she smiled at him reassuringly, walking with Petunia to the rear of the house.
"What a lovely surprise!" Lily exclaimed, sitting on a snow-covered bench. Petunia looked at it with disdain, but then sat beside her sister.
"How lovely," she said, scornfully, looking around at the overgrown garden with a smirk. Lily ignored the remark.
"It's certainly a surprise to see you here," she said. "A pleasant one, though."
"Well, when James sent me a letter asking if I'd come visit, I was surprised, too! But I decided to come, as it's Christmas. Our last visit was two years ago, at your wedding."
Lily smiled, "Well, I'm glad you're here now. But why are you crying? What's the matter?" she asked, concerned, as she conjured two cups of tea. "This should warm you up, Tuney," Lily said. "Now tell me, how'd you get here?"
Petunia sipped her tea, "James sent that vile man to come and get me. We took the train. I can't understand why James sent him."
They sipped their tea in an uncomfortable silence. Then Lily explained, "James didn't want you traveling alone, I imagine. He must've thought you'd feel safer with Peter. He's so thoughtful." It looked like Petunia wanted to disagree but she decided against it. "Are Vernon and Dudley doing well?" Lily asked politely.
"They're fine," Petunia sniffed. "Dudders is already starting to feed himself."
"Really?" Lily marveled. "You must be so proud. Harry’s already started to crawl." Petunia just stared at Lily skeptically, then her lip began to tremble. "What IS it Tuney? What's happened?"
"Something t-t-terrible! You see, I was dusting and I accidentally knocked Vernon's favorite golf trophy off the mantelpiece. It broke! Look!" Petunia pulled a small, gold trophy out of her bag. "The golf ball broke off the top and I can't glue it back on. I've tried everything!"
Lily looked in disbelief at her sister, "That's why you came? Because of Vernon's trophy? Honestly, Tuney! You amaze me!"
Petunia sobbed harder, "You don't understand! Vernon loves this trophy! He's going to be so upset if he sees it! I was hoping that you could fix it for m-me." She lowered her voice. "You must know a spell that could fix it. Vernon would never have to know."
Lily burst out laughing despite herself.
Petunia looked affronted. "Well, if you can't take this seriously I may as well—"
"Wait!" Lily interrupted. "I'm sorry I thought it was something worse."
"Worse?" Petunia wailed. "What could possibly be worse?" She clutched the trophy to her chest.
"Well, lots of...." Lily began, before changing her mind. "Of course I can fix it for you." She took out her wand and reached gently for the broken pieces of gold-painted metal. "Reparo!" she said with a flourish and instantly, the two pieces fused together perfectly.
Lily held it out and Petunia snatched it, joyfully. She wrapped it carefully in her scarf and returned it to her bag. She turned to Lily and said, "I still don't like magic, but I suppose it's got its uses." She finished her tea, rose from the bench, and walked towards the garden gate.
"Tuney, where are you going? Don't you want to visit with James and Harry?"
"It's getting late. Vernon and Dudders will be waiting," Petunia replied.
Lily looked hurt, "But I thought you..." she trailed off, as Petunia continued to walk away. A flurry of snow obscured her for a moment. Lily had one last glimpse of her sister before she walked off into the darkness.
Light spilled from the cottage windows across the snow. Lily stood and headed back into the welcoming warmth of her husband's arms. "Merry Christmas, my darling," she said, softly, smiling happily.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "A Christmas Eve Surprise"
Lily, James, and baby Harry were covered with snow. Christmas festivities were in full swing in Godric's Hollow. The church was festooned with small, twinkly lights and a huge wreath hung outside its stained glass window. Lily was surreptitiously melting a large pile of snow that covered a small statue in the graveyard. It was her favorite, a marble fawn gazing towards the heavens.
"Ma-ma," gurgled baby Harry, as he pulled firmly on her hair. Lily gently disentangled his fingers and waved her wand, making a snowball levitate to distract him. Harry followed the hovering, frozen orb closely, squealing with delight as it zoomed around.
"Look at how he follows the snowball!" James exclaimed. "He's going to be a Seeker for the England team, I think."
"Now James," Lily laughed, "I don't want Harry risking his life playing that game!"
James looked suddenly thoughtful. "I wonder where Padfoot and Moony are tonight. I thought they'd be here by now. The church service is nearly over."
In the shadows by the bell tower, two figures emerged. The snow muffled the sound of their footsteps.
"Prongs!" exclaimed a grinning Sirius. He headed straight for baby Harry. "There's my godson!” Lily smiled as Harry giggled. Sirius lifted the baby in the air, chuckling as the boy shrieked gleefully.
Remus clapped James on the shoulder. His face was tired but joyful. "Happy Christmas to you both. We should go inside," Remus suggested. "Poor Harry almost looks like a miniature snowman." Lily wrapped her cloak tightly around the baby and headed towards the entrance to the church.
"No dogs allowed I'm afraid, Padfoot," James teased.
"And great big bucks like you belong outdoors as well," replied Sirius, winking at Lily and leading the way through the heavy wooden doors. James held it open for Lily, with little Harry babbling in her arms.
The group made their way as quietly as they could to the last pew. "I don't see her," James said, squinting through the crowd.
"Bathilda's getting on a bit," Lily whispered. "Maybe she forgot, poor dear. Just like that time when she was supposed to bring round the highchair for Harry and instead she brought the bag of dungbombs?"
James chuckled, "Good point. Maybe we should—"
"Hey! Isn't that her, over there?" whispered Remus, pointing at a small woman hunched over a small, crumbling snowman. When she turned around, she caught sight of Lily and waved enthusiastically.
"She's outside!" Lily said, pointing at an open door that they hadn't noticed before. "She must've been waiting for us on the other side of the church the whole time."
Remus leaned across James and whispered conspiratorially, "We need to get back outside before Sirius starts singing! He's got off-key down to an art," he chuckled.
"Oi! I heard that!" yelled Sirius.
"Shhh," admonished James. "We're in a church." He tried to look stern, but, almost immediately, broke into a grin. They went out the moment the service ended. Bathilda was waiting for them by the snowman, now decorated with gleaming buttons and a wizard's hat.
Suddenly, a gust of wind blew, lifting the patched hat into the air. Lily used a Summoning spell to retrieve it, just as the rest of the congregation came spilling out into the park.
"Bathlida!" Lily called, smiling. "There you are. Let's get back to our house and have some mulled wine."
James shook his head. "No, Lily, remember? There's a chance that Dumbledore will come by for a visit, and I could really use some of his advice on what color to paint the kitchen. He's a really good person to ask, don't you think?"
Lily looked at James with suspicion. "We only decorated last year James. Why do we need to paint again?" asked Lily.
"Harry—"
"Hang on," Lily continued. "Why don't we just go to Bathilda's house? We can sort out your decorating issues later." James nodded, glancing at Sirius, who winked discreetly.
"Yes!" Bathilda said enthusiastically. "I baked some pumpkin shortbread. I'll put the kettle on so we can have some tea."
The group started trudging through the snow. Bathilda whistled cheerfully, happy to have some company on Christmas Eve. The six of them had reached Bathilda's just as the jingling of bells sounded overhead. They all looked up as a sleigh glided above the rooftops.
A large barn owl approached clutching a tightly rolled scroll. The message, bearing the Hogwarts crest, was addressed to Bathilda. "It's from Albus," she announced. They all squeezed through the doorway, in a hurry to warm up, and clustered around the roaring blaze Bathilda conjured in the fireplace. She unrolled Dumbledore's letter and began reading:
Dear Batty,
Thank you for the wonderful tome Being Brilliant: Staying Stylish. It is a wonderful book and I've had a delightful time reading the intricate sewing patterns suggested for fashionable pairs of socks! Regrettably however, I must decline your generous invitation to the New Year's Eve Dinner you’re holding. I have an unexpected, yet important, matter to attend to. I hope that you have a splendid time and good health in the coming year.
Yours always,
Albus
James exchanged glances with Sirius, Remus, and Lily. He wondered what unexpected event Dumbledore had to deal with. Bathilda left the room and Lily turned to James with a worried expression. "You're not going to pull some dangerous stunt, are you?" she whispered. The clatter of dishes in the kitchen made whispering unnecessary.
"Bathilda won't mind us," said James. "I asked her to brew her special mulled wine so that’ll keep her busy."
A barking laugh filled the room as Sirius turned to see Harry with his hand outstretched, trying to smack the rat which had just scuttled along the floor of the living room. Lily had put him down so he could crawl around. "Oi! Wormtail! Is that you?"
The ugly creature stopped and stood on its hind feet before growing very rapidly and morphing into the shape of a shifty-looking Peter Pettigrew. He looked at his friends and faked a smile. "Umm, hi everyone. Surprise!" There was a brief silence, quickly broken by Harry's wailing, as he started moving away from Peter.
"Don't cry, Harry," cooed Lily, stooping to pick him up. "It's only Peter."
"Here. Come to your favorite godfather," Sirius suggested, smiling broadly. Harry beamed and stretched out his arms for Sirius, who lifted his godson high above his head.
Bathilda re-entered carrying a tray of glasses and shortbread. She looked at Peter and sneered. "Hello, Peter. I see you have entered my home without knocking and have skulked about, as usual." The tension in the room was as thick as congealed porridge, broken only by little Harry, who giggled in delight as Sirius tickled him.
"What are you doing here, Wormtail?" Remus asked. "We weren't expecting you tonight."
Peter blinked rapidly, his watery eyes darting sheepishly toward Bathilda. "Well, I wanted to bring Harry's Christmas present right over," he said, eyeing James meaningfully. "I left it under the tree," Peter finished.
"Well then, why don't we head back to our house so Harry can open his present," James suggested.
Lily looked stern, "We must have Christmas drinks with Bathilda first, like we promised."
James glanced at Peter then sat down. He was anxious to show Lily the surprise he had organized, but he didn't want to be rude. "Right. Drinks."
Bathilda bustled around, serving everyone and "accidentally" spilling some hot wine on Peter. He jumped up quickly, pulling his wand out of his pocket and mopping up the spill. "Never get Bathilda mad at you,” Peter began. “Last summer I accidentally left my broomstick on her floor and she tripped over it. She turned me into a ferret."
Sirius laughed heartily. Peter looked sulky. Lily decided to move things along.
"Harry's tired. He needs to get to bed."
Soon everyone was headed out Bathilda's front door, with Remus leading the way. James carried Harry, all bundled up in the blanket Lily's mother had knitted when Lily was expecting. They turned the corner and saw a magnificent sight: in front of their house stood Petunia looking cold and uncomfortable with the situation.
"Tuney?" whispered Lily in disbelief.
"Who's that?" asked Sirius, quietly.
"My sister," Lily answered automatically, moving quickly toward her. It was only then she saw that Petunia was crying, her tears glistening in the glow from the fairylights, which hung on the Potter's front door and windows. "Are you okay?" Lily asked her, squeezing her sister's hands, reassuringly.
Petunia blinked her eyes and mumbled, "Can we speak privately?"
"Of course," Lily replied, "come into the back garden." The others turned to go inside. James looked back at Lily and she smiled at him reassuringly, walking with Petunia to the rear of the house.
"What a lovely surprise!" Lily exclaimed, sitting on a snow-covered bench. Petunia looked at it with disdain, but then sat beside her sister.
"How lovely," she said, scornfully, looking around at the overgrown garden with a smirk. Lily ignored the remark.
"It's certainly a surprise to see you here," she said. "A pleasant one, though."
"Well, when James sent me a letter asking if I'd come visit, I was surprised, too! But I decided to come, as it's Christmas. Our last visit was two years ago, at your wedding."
Lily smiled, "Well, I'm glad you're here now. But why are you crying? What's the matter?" she asked, concerned, as she conjured two cups of tea. "This should warm you up, Tuney," Lily said. "Now tell me, how'd you get here?"
Petunia sipped her tea, "James sent that vile man to come and get me. We took the train. I can't understand why James sent him."
They sipped their tea in an uncomfortable silence. Then Lily explained, "James didn't want you traveling alone, I imagine. He must've thought you'd feel safer with Peter. He's so thoughtful." It looked like Petunia wanted to disagree but she decided against it. "Are Vernon and Dudley doing well?" Lily asked politely.
"They're fine," Petunia sniffed. "Dudders is already starting to feed himself."
"Really?" Lily marveled. "You must be so proud. Harry’s already started to crawl." Petunia just stared at Lily skeptically, then her lip began to tremble. "What IS it Tuney? What's happened?"
"Something t-t-terrible! You see, I was dusting and I accidentally knocked Vernon's favorite golf trophy off the mantelpiece. It broke! Look!" Petunia pulled a small, gold trophy out of her bag. "The golf ball broke off the top and I can't glue it back on. I've tried everything!"
Lily looked in disbelief at her sister, "That's why you came? Because of Vernon's trophy? Honestly, Tuney! You amaze me!"
Petunia sobbed harder, "You don't understand! Vernon loves this trophy! He's going to be so upset if he sees it! I was hoping that you could fix it for m-me." She lowered her voice. "You must know a spell that could fix it. Vernon would never have to know."
Lily burst out laughing despite herself.
Petunia looked affronted. "Well, if you can't take this seriously I may as well—"
"Wait!" Lily interrupted. "I'm sorry I thought it was something worse."
"Worse?" Petunia wailed. "What could possibly be worse?" She clutched the trophy to her chest.
"Well, lots of...." Lily began, before changing her mind. "Of course I can fix it for you." She took out her wand and reached gently for the broken pieces of gold-painted metal. "Reparo!" she said with a flourish and instantly, the two pieces fused together perfectly.
Lily held it out and Petunia snatched it, joyfully. She wrapped it carefully in her scarf and returned it to her bag. She turned to Lily and said, "I still don't like magic, but I suppose it's got its uses." She finished her tea, rose from the bench, and walked towards the garden gate.
"Tuney, where are you going? Don't you want to visit with James and Harry?"
"It's getting late. Vernon and Dudders will be waiting," Petunia replied.
Lily looked hurt, "But I thought you..." she trailed off, as Petunia continued to walk away. A flurry of snow obscured her for a moment. Lily had one last glimpse of her sister before she walked off into the darkness.
Light spilled from the cottage windows across the snow. Lily stood and headed back into the welcoming warmth of her husband's arms. "Merry Christmas, my darling," she said, softly, smiling happily.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:31 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #100 stats
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 10:51 am
These stats were first posted by Potteraholic - Jan 9, 2009 9:38 pm (#418 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 100
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 414
Total Words: 2070
Last Submission Date: #415, January 8, 2009, 2:52 AM (PatPat)
Total Time to Create Story: 17 days, 7 hours, 44 minutes
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 100
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| Potteraholic | 100 |
| Puck | 85 |
| Verity Weasley | 123 |
| Columbine Fairy | 4 |
| Dryleaves | 3 |
| azi | 16 |
| Quinn Crockett | 32 |
| PatPat | 45 |
| Anna L. Black | 2 |
| Finn BV | 4 |
Total Submissions: 414
Total Words: 2070
Last Submission Date: #415, January 8, 2009, 2:52 AM (PatPat)
Total Time to Create Story: 17 days, 7 hours, 44 minutes
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #100 post-story comments
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 10:53 am
These post-story comments were first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 24, 2010 7:01 am (#2932 of 2960) [Edited Dec 15, 2010 12 am] on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Post-Story Comments for Story #100, Volume X,
Potty Five Words: "A Christmas Eve Surprise"
This story was written from December 21, 2008 to January 8, 2009. Ten writers contributed to the story, which is 2,070 words long. Five of the ten writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Jan 9, 2009 9:39 pm: I've read this story over a few times, and despite the inconsistencies — I never did understand that whole bit about repainting the kitchen that was James' excuse for the surprise, and why Sirius has to ask James who Petunia is if he winked discreetly at James earlier re: James' surprise for Lily — I think we managed to write an entertaining, interesting tale, true to the spirit of all the characters involved. I do think that we have an easier time of it when we write shorter stories, that are a lot less complicated. There were times when I felt like the story was a bit contrived... but it all worked out in the end, thank goodness!
I encourage everyone to share their post-story comments with their first five words once the new story starts. Reflecting on what we've written is a helpful exercise, I think, and can only improve our writing, don't you think?
- Verity Weasley, Jan 9, 2009 10:50 pm: You've done a great job with compiling the story again, PAH. Like you said, I think it was an entertaining story that was faithful to the characterisation of the characters involved. There were some great touches of humour, but one point that made me laugh out loud was unintentional I think. That was where they were returning from Bathilda's to see a magnificent sight - which turned out to be Petunia standing in the snow looking cold and uncomfortable! That was a little incongruent I think. Anyway, it was fun to write, as always.
- Puck, Jan 10, 2009 12:39 am: I think the odd twists and turns are the fun of 5 words. I thought it was bittersweet to think that was Lily's final visit with her sister.
- PatPat, Jan 10, 2009 1:03 am: Great job, as always, PAH! I agree with you that we were able to pull together the story despite some missteps. I do tend to think our better stories are the ones that are shorter and simpler. But it is fun to try to extend ourselves a little too. We just have to be careful, I think, not to put in too many plot details. We are not writing Harry Potter 8. But everyone, as usual, did a great job. Yay, us!!
- Dryleaves, Jan 10, 2009 5:00 pm: I lost track completely of the previous story, so I waited until the new one started. I liked the previous story by the way.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Post-Story Comments for Story #100, Volume X,
Potty Five Words: "A Christmas Eve Surprise"
This story was written from December 21, 2008 to January 8, 2009. Ten writers contributed to the story, which is 2,070 words long. Five of the ten writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Jan 9, 2009 9:39 pm: I've read this story over a few times, and despite the inconsistencies — I never did understand that whole bit about repainting the kitchen that was James' excuse for the surprise, and why Sirius has to ask James who Petunia is if he winked discreetly at James earlier re: James' surprise for Lily — I think we managed to write an entertaining, interesting tale, true to the spirit of all the characters involved. I do think that we have an easier time of it when we write shorter stories, that are a lot less complicated. There were times when I felt like the story was a bit contrived... but it all worked out in the end, thank goodness!
I encourage everyone to share their post-story comments with their first five words once the new story starts. Reflecting on what we've written is a helpful exercise, I think, and can only improve our writing, don't you think?
- Verity Weasley, Jan 9, 2009 10:50 pm: You've done a great job with compiling the story again, PAH. Like you said, I think it was an entertaining story that was faithful to the characterisation of the characters involved. There were some great touches of humour, but one point that made me laugh out loud was unintentional I think. That was where they were returning from Bathilda's to see a magnificent sight - which turned out to be Petunia standing in the snow looking cold and uncomfortable! That was a little incongruent I think. Anyway, it was fun to write, as always.
- Puck, Jan 10, 2009 12:39 am: I think the odd twists and turns are the fun of 5 words. I thought it was bittersweet to think that was Lily's final visit with her sister.
- PatPat, Jan 10, 2009 1:03 am: Great job, as always, PAH! I agree with you that we were able to pull together the story despite some missteps. I do tend to think our better stories are the ones that are shorter and simpler. But it is fun to try to extend ourselves a little too. We just have to be careful, I think, not to put in too many plot details. We are not writing Harry Potter 8. But everyone, as usual, did a great job. Yay, us!!
- Dryleaves, Jan 10, 2009 5:00 pm: I lost track completely of the previous story, so I waited until the new one started. I liked the previous story by the way.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Mon Aug 15, 2011 7:21 am; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #101
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 4:52 pm
This story was first posted by PatPat - Jan 29, 2009 1:37 am (#730 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Rita Skeeter was skulking around Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop. She had heard a rumor that Arthur Weasley and Molly Prewett were sneaking off the grounds for a secret rendezvous in Hogsmeade. Rita's mad crush on Arthur Weasley had driven her to peeping through windows. Footsteps from behind made Rita turn with alacrity.
"Well look who's here!" said a cheery Arthur.
"Rita Skeeter!" came another voice, this one much less friendly. Rita scowled as she looked at the couple holding hands. Molly was also frowning, "What brings you here, Rita?" she asked pointedly, through slightly clenched teeth.
Rita waved her hand nonchalantly and replied, "Oh, I was just in the mood for a cup of tea..."
"There's tea at Hogwarts," Molly said.
Rita gave her a look of contempt. "I like Madam Puddifoot's teas much better than that swill the house-elves make."
"Well, Arthur and I want to have a private conversation, so please excuse us."
"We do?" Arthur asked, looking at Molly with surprise.
Rita smirked and tossed her blond curls, "Of course." She pretended to act like she hadn't the slightest concern what Arthur was saying. Molly looked at Rita suspiciously. She didn't trust her for one time-turning second.
Molly turned her attention to Arthur, linking her arm with his, saying, "Let's go inside and find a cozy corner for just the two of us." She pushed open the shop door. The scent of coffee wafted invitingly toward them as they made their way to a small table in the furthest corner. Rita followed and sat at a table nearby, facing Arthur. She reapplied her red nail polish as she waited to order. Arthur leaned across the table and showed Molly the Muggle wristwatch he had purchased at a church jumble sale. It didn't work, however, but he was still very excited about it.
"Look! Here's the knob you twist to make the hands move. Apparently, winding it every day keeps it running." His enthusiasm made Molly smile. She didn't understand his strange obsession with Muggle artifacts, but at least he was sharing his excitement with her. Rita would just turn green with envy if she knew that Arthur had given me a Muggle quill, a beautiful gold one, for my birthday. She glanced at Rita's table and saw that she'd also applied bright red lipstick. Looks like a scarlet woman, Molly thought.
Rita took out her mascara and began reapplying it liberally. Satisfied with the effect after checking her reflection in a spoon, she gazed around at all the other couples, and rose quickly. Passing Arthur, she "accidentally" fell into his lap, knocking the milk pitcher over, showering Molly. Arthur, jumping up, performed a drying charm, dropping Rita to the floor with a resounding thud. The other customers snickered into their teacups at the sight of Rita with her robes splayed all around her and her lipstick smudged across her cheek.
"Are you okay, Rita?" Arthur asked with concern in his voice.
Rita was frowning and replied, "Everyone's laughing at me! I don't think it's very funny, Molly!"
"I didn't do anything!" Molly retorted hotly. "I was just sitting here, and you spilled milk all over me, you... you..."
"Now, now," Arthur soothed, looking from one seething girl to the other. Molly had got to her feet and was staring at Rita with her hands clenched in fists. He stepped forward and helped Rita up off the floor.
Molly quickly grabbed a chair, "Here, Rita. You can sit. We're leaving." She then pulled Arthur aside and spoke in hushed tones, "Arthur, let's get out of here. There's something I want to get at Honeydukes."
Arthur looked confused, "What about Rita? It wouldn't be polite to just leave her here by herself."
Molly replied, "She came here by herself, didn't she? Why can't she just leave by herself?" She didn't wait for a response, but turned and headed for the door. Arthur glanced apologetically at Rita and shrugged.
"Is Molly feeling jealous?" Rita asked, smugly.
Arthur didn't hear her, since he was already running out the door after Molly. Rita decided it was time to go back to Hogwarts. Arthur seemed to fancy Molly. A love triangle was not her style. She would tell her friends her own version of what had happened in the café. In it, she'd make sure that Molly was painted as a batty, fool!
As she trudged through the gates she planned her opening line for this week's column in the school paper, 'The Hogwarts Herald'.
Molly Prewett's love potion seems to be missing a key ingredient, Rita thought to herself, which is why Arthur Weasley seems less than smitten with her. His indifference was obvious when the two were observed together at that well-known haunt of young couples, Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop, in Hogsmeade. An obvious indifference. Obvious to everyone but Molly. If she thinks she can unlock the key to Arthur's heart she is alarmingly misguided. Arthur is impervious to her dubious charms. His heart beats ardently, but his true passion lies with his unwavering pursuit of Muggle artifacts.
Rita paused briefly. She realized, with a jolt, that there was someone in the clump of rose bushes near the lake. She crept closer until her nose was almost touching the foliage. The sight before her made her gasp. Arthur and Molly were sitting on a small bench and had their arms wrapped around each other in a tight embrace and were kissing passionately. Leaning in closer to get a better look, Rita almost took her eye out on a thorn. Mumbling to herself, she adjusted her position so she wouldn't impale herself. I wish I could get closer without being noticed and without catching on these thorns.
Rita pulled back as a shiny beetle landed on the rose two inches from her nose. My word, that beetle's small! If only I were that small, I'd be able to get stories anytime I want! I just wish I knew a spell to—
Her thoughts were interrupted as Molly suddenly disentangled herself from Arthur. She jumped up and moved toward the bushes where Rita was only partly concealed.
"What is it, Molly?" Arthur asked, rising from the bench quickly.
"I thought I heard something," she replied, peering through the foliage. Rita attempted to flee, but her robes snagged on a thorn. She pricked her fingers trying to free herself, but to no avail.
"YOU!" Molly bellowed. "Trust YOU to poke around where you don't belong! FIRST, Madam Puddifoot's and NOW, this! Spying in bushes! I would've thought you'd have better things to do!" Molly glared at Rita, shaking in fury. Rita stood her ground, glaring hard, right back at her. Arthur stood uncomfortably, shifting his weight awkwardly. He tried to reach for Molly's arm, but she pulled away angrily. "Don't try to defend her this time! I'm sick of it! She's a conniving little—"
"Calm down, Molly," Arthur interrupted, quickly. "There's no need to be so upset. She just seems to have caught herself on the rosebush."
Molly shot him a scathing look, then stomped off in the direction of the castle. Arthur turned to Rita, who had finally managed to free herself from the attacking foliage.
"Look, Rita," he began. "Please understand... I'm flattered that you fancy me—"
"Fancy you!" Rita stammered, backing away, "I don't fancy you! I was just looking for a story for the newspaper!"
Molly snorted, "What rubbish!" She had returned to collect her bag of sweets from Honeydukes that she'd left on the bench. She glared at Rita and then said, "The lipstick? The nail polish? What was that for? Quite a spectacle you were making of yourself, all for a story for the school newspaper? If you expect us to believe that, you're battier than Barny the Butterbeer fruitbat!"
"It's the truth!" Rita spat, taking a step toward Molly.
"You can say what you like, but I know what's what, Rita. A girl can tell when someone is interested in someone as more than a friend." She turned to Arthur, who looked bewildered and was glancing back and forth between the two seething girls.
"Um... Molly, Rita, I really don't think... I mean... um... perhaps we should just—" He stopped abruptly as Molly deliberately kissed him on the lips. She turned and stared at Rita, who looked like she had been slapped in the face. She ran off towards the castle without a single glance back at the canoodling couple in the bushes. A beetle flew past her nose, landed on her favorite flower barrette, and crawled onto her hair. As she tried to brush it aside, she was reminded of her earlier idea.
If only I knew how to make myself as small and inconspicuous as this beetle, she thought. Then I'd be right there, up close wherever the action was, and get the juiciest details on every story. A delicious idea, Rita concluded.
She decided that she would keep her plan a secret and research the best way to become an extremely small Animagus. The library was her destination. She quickened her pace, filled with a fresh sense of purpose. Once she unlocked the mystery of Transfiguration, there would be no stopping her. The quill would be mightier than the wand!
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Rita Buzzes Around"
Rita Skeeter was skulking around Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop. She had heard a rumor that Arthur Weasley and Molly Prewett were sneaking off the grounds for a secret rendezvous in Hogsmeade. Rita's mad crush on Arthur Weasley had driven her to peeping through windows. Footsteps from behind made Rita turn with alacrity.
"Well look who's here!" said a cheery Arthur.
"Rita Skeeter!" came another voice, this one much less friendly. Rita scowled as she looked at the couple holding hands. Molly was also frowning, "What brings you here, Rita?" she asked pointedly, through slightly clenched teeth.
Rita waved her hand nonchalantly and replied, "Oh, I was just in the mood for a cup of tea..."
"There's tea at Hogwarts," Molly said.
Rita gave her a look of contempt. "I like Madam Puddifoot's teas much better than that swill the house-elves make."
"Well, Arthur and I want to have a private conversation, so please excuse us."
"We do?" Arthur asked, looking at Molly with surprise.
Rita smirked and tossed her blond curls, "Of course." She pretended to act like she hadn't the slightest concern what Arthur was saying. Molly looked at Rita suspiciously. She didn't trust her for one time-turning second.
Molly turned her attention to Arthur, linking her arm with his, saying, "Let's go inside and find a cozy corner for just the two of us." She pushed open the shop door. The scent of coffee wafted invitingly toward them as they made their way to a small table in the furthest corner. Rita followed and sat at a table nearby, facing Arthur. She reapplied her red nail polish as she waited to order. Arthur leaned across the table and showed Molly the Muggle wristwatch he had purchased at a church jumble sale. It didn't work, however, but he was still very excited about it.
"Look! Here's the knob you twist to make the hands move. Apparently, winding it every day keeps it running." His enthusiasm made Molly smile. She didn't understand his strange obsession with Muggle artifacts, but at least he was sharing his excitement with her. Rita would just turn green with envy if she knew that Arthur had given me a Muggle quill, a beautiful gold one, for my birthday. She glanced at Rita's table and saw that she'd also applied bright red lipstick. Looks like a scarlet woman, Molly thought.
Rita took out her mascara and began reapplying it liberally. Satisfied with the effect after checking her reflection in a spoon, she gazed around at all the other couples, and rose quickly. Passing Arthur, she "accidentally" fell into his lap, knocking the milk pitcher over, showering Molly. Arthur, jumping up, performed a drying charm, dropping Rita to the floor with a resounding thud. The other customers snickered into their teacups at the sight of Rita with her robes splayed all around her and her lipstick smudged across her cheek.
"Are you okay, Rita?" Arthur asked with concern in his voice.
Rita was frowning and replied, "Everyone's laughing at me! I don't think it's very funny, Molly!"
"I didn't do anything!" Molly retorted hotly. "I was just sitting here, and you spilled milk all over me, you... you..."
"Now, now," Arthur soothed, looking from one seething girl to the other. Molly had got to her feet and was staring at Rita with her hands clenched in fists. He stepped forward and helped Rita up off the floor.
Molly quickly grabbed a chair, "Here, Rita. You can sit. We're leaving." She then pulled Arthur aside and spoke in hushed tones, "Arthur, let's get out of here. There's something I want to get at Honeydukes."
Arthur looked confused, "What about Rita? It wouldn't be polite to just leave her here by herself."
Molly replied, "She came here by herself, didn't she? Why can't she just leave by herself?" She didn't wait for a response, but turned and headed for the door. Arthur glanced apologetically at Rita and shrugged.
"Is Molly feeling jealous?" Rita asked, smugly.
Arthur didn't hear her, since he was already running out the door after Molly. Rita decided it was time to go back to Hogwarts. Arthur seemed to fancy Molly. A love triangle was not her style. She would tell her friends her own version of what had happened in the café. In it, she'd make sure that Molly was painted as a batty, fool!
As she trudged through the gates she planned her opening line for this week's column in the school paper, 'The Hogwarts Herald'.
Molly Prewett's love potion seems to be missing a key ingredient, Rita thought to herself, which is why Arthur Weasley seems less than smitten with her. His indifference was obvious when the two were observed together at that well-known haunt of young couples, Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop, in Hogsmeade. An obvious indifference. Obvious to everyone but Molly. If she thinks she can unlock the key to Arthur's heart she is alarmingly misguided. Arthur is impervious to her dubious charms. His heart beats ardently, but his true passion lies with his unwavering pursuit of Muggle artifacts.
Rita paused briefly. She realized, with a jolt, that there was someone in the clump of rose bushes near the lake. She crept closer until her nose was almost touching the foliage. The sight before her made her gasp. Arthur and Molly were sitting on a small bench and had their arms wrapped around each other in a tight embrace and were kissing passionately. Leaning in closer to get a better look, Rita almost took her eye out on a thorn. Mumbling to herself, she adjusted her position so she wouldn't impale herself. I wish I could get closer without being noticed and without catching on these thorns.
Rita pulled back as a shiny beetle landed on the rose two inches from her nose. My word, that beetle's small! If only I were that small, I'd be able to get stories anytime I want! I just wish I knew a spell to—
Her thoughts were interrupted as Molly suddenly disentangled herself from Arthur. She jumped up and moved toward the bushes where Rita was only partly concealed.
"What is it, Molly?" Arthur asked, rising from the bench quickly.
"I thought I heard something," she replied, peering through the foliage. Rita attempted to flee, but her robes snagged on a thorn. She pricked her fingers trying to free herself, but to no avail.
"YOU!" Molly bellowed. "Trust YOU to poke around where you don't belong! FIRST, Madam Puddifoot's and NOW, this! Spying in bushes! I would've thought you'd have better things to do!" Molly glared at Rita, shaking in fury. Rita stood her ground, glaring hard, right back at her. Arthur stood uncomfortably, shifting his weight awkwardly. He tried to reach for Molly's arm, but she pulled away angrily. "Don't try to defend her this time! I'm sick of it! She's a conniving little—"
"Calm down, Molly," Arthur interrupted, quickly. "There's no need to be so upset. She just seems to have caught herself on the rosebush."
Molly shot him a scathing look, then stomped off in the direction of the castle. Arthur turned to Rita, who had finally managed to free herself from the attacking foliage.
"Look, Rita," he began. "Please understand... I'm flattered that you fancy me—"
"Fancy you!" Rita stammered, backing away, "I don't fancy you! I was just looking for a story for the newspaper!"
Molly snorted, "What rubbish!" She had returned to collect her bag of sweets from Honeydukes that she'd left on the bench. She glared at Rita and then said, "The lipstick? The nail polish? What was that for? Quite a spectacle you were making of yourself, all for a story for the school newspaper? If you expect us to believe that, you're battier than Barny the Butterbeer fruitbat!"
"It's the truth!" Rita spat, taking a step toward Molly.
"You can say what you like, but I know what's what, Rita. A girl can tell when someone is interested in someone as more than a friend." She turned to Arthur, who looked bewildered and was glancing back and forth between the two seething girls.
"Um... Molly, Rita, I really don't think... I mean... um... perhaps we should just—" He stopped abruptly as Molly deliberately kissed him on the lips. She turned and stared at Rita, who looked like she had been slapped in the face. She ran off towards the castle without a single glance back at the canoodling couple in the bushes. A beetle flew past her nose, landed on her favorite flower barrette, and crawled onto her hair. As she tried to brush it aside, she was reminded of her earlier idea.
If only I knew how to make myself as small and inconspicuous as this beetle, she thought. Then I'd be right there, up close wherever the action was, and get the juiciest details on every story. A delicious idea, Rita concluded.
She decided that she would keep her plan a secret and research the best way to become an extremely small Animagus. The library was her destination. She quickened her pace, filled with a fresh sense of purpose. Once she unlocked the mystery of Transfiguration, there would be no stopping her. The quill would be mightier than the wand!
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:31 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #101 stats
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 4:55 pm
These stats were first posted by PatPat – Jan 29, 2009 2:02 am (#731 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 101
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 309
Total Words: 1545
Last Submission Date: #728, January 28, 2009, 12:39 AM (Potteraholic)
Total Time to Create Story: 18 days, 1 hour, 49 minutes
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 101
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| Verity Weasley | 80 |
| Potteraholic | 93 |
| Puck | 78 |
| PatPat | 48 |
| Quinn Crockett | 2 |
| Dryleaves | 5 |
| azi | 3 |
Total Submissions: 309
Total Words: 1545
Last Submission Date: #728, January 28, 2009, 12:39 AM (Potteraholic)
Total Time to Create Story: 18 days, 1 hour, 49 minutes
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #101 post-story comments
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 4:57 pm
These post-story comments were first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 24, 2010 7:01 am (#2933 of 2960) [Edited Dec 15, 2010 1 am] on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Post-Story Comments for Story #101, Volume X,
Potty Five Words: "Rita Buzzes Around"
This story was written from January 9, 2009 to January 28, 2009. Seven writers contributed to the story, which is 1,545 words long. Three of the seven writers posted feedback.
- PatPat, Jan 29, 2009 2:08 am: Yay!! The end of another story! I actually really like how this one turned out. I have said before that our best stories are the ones that we keep simple. Not too many plot details to confuse us! I think this story was another example of just that. Very simple. Focused mainly on character development and a basic plot. Well done, everyone! I really only have two things to comment on:
1) Please try to make sure that you indicate when a new paragraph starts. For example, when a new speaker begins talking or a new thought begins. This, I believe, makes it easier for people coming in later to follow the story. It also makes it much easier for the compiling process.
2) Don't forget to italicize (using <*i> at the beginning and at the end) when writing about a person's thoughts. This is another thing that will make it easier for people to read.
Anyway, great job again. And well done, PAH! Look forward to the new story.
- Potteraholic, Jan 29, 2009 11:02 am: Thanks for getting the story up quickly, PatPat! Great job keeping those out-of-sequence posts straight! And LOVE the title!
I liked how the story turned out, too. I think we really fleshed out the characters well and managed to include tiny tidbits of information that we knew about the trio as adults, (Hey! a new trio!) into their teenaged personas. And I also loved the idea of Rita fancying Arthur and being rebuffed by him! I wonder if that was ever something JKR thought of? Will we see it in the Scottish Book?
And I agree with what you said, PatPat, about the paragraph breaks and italics, too.
- Verity Weasley, Jan 29, 2009 8:52 pm: Regarding the previous story, I can't believe it took so long! Almost three weeks! It has been quiet around here lately! Anyway, it was a fun story, very entertaining, nice and light-hearted. I liked all the dialogue between the characters. I think we managed to keep it authentic.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Post-Story Comments for Story #101, Volume X,
Potty Five Words: "Rita Buzzes Around"
This story was written from January 9, 2009 to January 28, 2009. Seven writers contributed to the story, which is 1,545 words long. Three of the seven writers posted feedback.
- PatPat, Jan 29, 2009 2:08 am: Yay!! The end of another story! I actually really like how this one turned out. I have said before that our best stories are the ones that we keep simple. Not too many plot details to confuse us! I think this story was another example of just that. Very simple. Focused mainly on character development and a basic plot. Well done, everyone! I really only have two things to comment on:
1) Please try to make sure that you indicate when a new paragraph starts. For example, when a new speaker begins talking or a new thought begins. This, I believe, makes it easier for people coming in later to follow the story. It also makes it much easier for the compiling process.
2) Don't forget to italicize (using <*i> at the beginning and at the end) when writing about a person's thoughts. This is another thing that will make it easier for people to read.
Anyway, great job again. And well done, PAH! Look forward to the new story.
- Potteraholic, Jan 29, 2009 11:02 am: Thanks for getting the story up quickly, PatPat! Great job keeping those out-of-sequence posts straight! And LOVE the title!
I liked how the story turned out, too. I think we really fleshed out the characters well and managed to include tiny tidbits of information that we knew about the trio as adults, (Hey! a new trio!) into their teenaged personas. And I also loved the idea of Rita fancying Arthur and being rebuffed by him! I wonder if that was ever something JKR thought of? Will we see it in the Scottish Book?
And I agree with what you said, PatPat, about the paragraph breaks and italics, too.
- Verity Weasley, Jan 29, 2009 8:52 pm: Regarding the previous story, I can't believe it took so long! Almost three weeks! It has been quiet around here lately! Anyway, it was a fun story, very entertaining, nice and light-hearted. I liked all the dialogue between the characters. I think we managed to keep it authentic.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Mon Aug 15, 2011 7:22 am; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #102
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 4:58 pm
This story was first posted by PatPat - Feb 22, 2009 2:04 am (#1101 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
"We're in Greece, Seamus!" Dean stated in a bewildered tone. They both looked around, taking in the unexpected scenery. They had expected to arrive in Greenwich.
"Again? Why do we have such a hard time with portkeys?" Seamus mused. Dean was too busy looking around to answer. He had always fancied visiting Greece. They had been to Greenwich numerous times before, so he wasn't too fussed about the mistake.
They started walking. "Look at that architecture! It's amazing!" Dean stated excitedly, pointing to the ruins of an ancient temple. There were lions carved above the stone gateway, with rugged steps leading up to a walled enclosure, where some sort of festival seemed to be taking place.
"Let's find out what's going on," Dean suggested. "It could be a ceremony of magic! Do you think we could blend in with the other people here?"
Seamus looked around at the assembled throng carefully. "They're all wearing Muggle clothes. Maybe we should try and change before we head over there," he concluded. Looking to his right, he saw an anachronistic-looking telephone box which gave him an idea. "We could change in that old phone box," said Seamus, pointing. "We might stand out a wee bit if we try mingling in these robes."
The two friends made their way towards the phone booth. Suddenly, a large group of tourists ran screaming in their direction.
"Run! Run!" they were yelling frantically. "The Chimaera of Mycenae is on the rampage! It's heading this way!" Seamus and Dean bolted in the direction of the phone booth and pulled themselves through the door.
"Now what?" asked Seamus, as Dean wriggled out of his robe.
"Take yours off, too!" he directed Seamus. The pair were struggling to disrobe in the confines of the antiquated booth. "Ouch! Watch your elbows."
"MY elbows? What about yours? I'm going to have bruises."
Meanwhile panicked tourists were swarming around outside. "HELP! Somebody save us!!!"
"Let's go!!!" Dean cried. They spilled out of the booth, and charged towards the snarling creature, wands raised.
"Wait!" Seamus exclaimed. "What spell are we going to use to subdue this thing? It's meaner looking than that Antipodean Opaleye in Australia!"
Dean looked blank, momentarily. "The Conjunctivitis curse! It worked last time!" he suggested. Seamus nodded and together they pointed their wands at the approaching creature. Its vicious tail cracked like a whip as it thrashed around wildly and the two deadly spikes passed within inches of Seamus' face.
"Blimey!" he croaked, ducking. "That was close!" The Chimaera's leonine head turned in their direction.
"Now!" ordered Dean, brandishing his wand like a sword. Together they hollered the incantation, but it didn't seem to work.
"What now?" asked Seamus, ducking again as the Chimaera lurched forward suddenly, growling loudly.
"PETRIFICUS TOTALUS!" Dean roared, waving his wand at the beast just as a massive paw landed uncomfortably close to Dean's feet. Seamus chimed in, adding his voice to Dean's, but it only seemed to anger the creature. The wizards were desperate for any spell that might hinder the advancing Chimaera.
"IMPEDIMENTA!" came a shout from behind the harried duo. It was a squad of Greek Emergency Magical Creature Wranglers, Apparating all around the area. Dean cheered but his relief was short-lived. His eyes widened in fright as the terrifying creature lashed its fierce tail against some of the cobblestone path.
"Look out!" he called, narrowly avoiding the thrashing appendage.
"Dean, get back!" yelled Seamus, ducking behind a thick, stone wall. The Greek wizards seemed to be unfazed by the Chimaera and moved in to surround it. At a signal from their leader, they all yelled in unison, in Greek, "MEGALOS YPOTASSOMOS!"
Seamus and Dean stared in amazement as the Chimaera's legs buckled. A resounding "THUD" echoed around the majestic ruins as it crashed to the ground.
"Blimey! How did they manage...?" asked Dean, gobsmacked.
Hector Leandros, a stout wizard with dark hair, turned and said, "The beast will soon regain her consciousness. My squad has to bind her before she wakes."
"Your squad?" asked Dean. "Excuse me, but who are you blokes?"
"We're a squad of Emergency Magical Creature Wranglers. Our task is to return this female to a facility that ensures the safety of the local population. One of her eggs is missing though, and if we don't find it," Hector looked seriously at the boys and shook his head. "Well, there will be trouble."
Dean glanced over at the recumbent Chimaera, then at the seven Greek wizards bustling around it. "How can we help?" he asked, gesturing towards Seamus.
Hector pointed to the Muggles that were milling around curiously and whispering to each other. "How are you at Memory Charms?" he asked.
Seamus grinned. "Not bad. Better than Gilderoy Lockhart!" The man looked confused for a minute, "Who's he?"
"Never mind," Dean said, chuckling.
"Now, is that all you need us to do?" added Seamus.
Hector hesitated, then said, "After you tend to the Muggles, we could use some help locating the egg."
Dean nodded, then he and Seamus walked towards some Muggles, cowering beside the stone wall. Holding their wands aloft, they muttered the spells needed to modify memories. They convinced the Muggles that they had seen nothing unusual that day; that it had been a perfectly normal afternoon of sightseeing. One young boy asked Seamus about the festival and whether the creature being honored was as dangerous as the books said it was.
Dean and Seamus looked at him with mounting concern. They decided that they needed a stronger charm for this particular boy. He seemed to be resistant to their first attempt. He was continuing to blabber on about the beast to everyone he met! They exchanged worried glances.
"What do you think we should do?" Seamus asked.
"Obliviatemaximus, you reckon?" Dean suggested.
"Worth a try," agreed Seamus, and together they flourished their wands and uttered the incantation. A glazed look immediately fell across the face of the boy, as well as everyone who'd heard him rambling about the magnificent creature that lay peacefully, mere feet away. The Muggles continued to stare blankly past the Chimaera.
"Umm, Dean, do you reckon we overdid it a bit?" asked Seamus hesitantly.
Dean nodded. How were they going to get the Muggles acting normally again? "I suppose we could break the spell and try again," he suggested. "Or we could wait and hope it wears off a bit."
Seamus looked uncomfortable. "If we leave them they could wander off and get lost. Permanently. I think we need to fix them somehow."
Dean looked thoughtfully at the gathered crowd of people. "If we could get a Healer, maybe they could sort everyone out and make sure they're okay."
Seamus nodded, "Great idea! Where do we find one, then? It's not like they just wander about, do they?"
"Yeah, hadn't thought of that," Dean replied thoughtfully.
Hector returned just then to see how the memory modifications were proceeding. One look at the assembled crowd of blank-faced Muggles, and that told him all he needed to know. "It looks like some Healers will have to be summoned! I thought you two knew what you were doing! Idiots!"
"Hang on," Seamus said, his face reddening. "We've done our best. Some of these Muggles are thick! It's not our fault the charm didn't work!"
Hector looked at them, bewildered, muttering something in Greek under his breath. "Althea! Come here, we've got a problem on our hands."
An attractive young witch came running over. "What's the problem, Hector?" she asked, but then took one look at Dean and immediately began batting her long eyelashes. "Hi there! And who are you?" Her feminine wiles went unnoticed. Dean was still furious about being treated so badly when they were only trying to help.
"Althea! You need to help these Muggles," Hector interrupted irritably.
"Oblivion Restorum!" and with a cheeky wink at Dean, and a complicated wave of her wand, Althea restored the Muggles' memories, sans the ones with the Chimaera. Dean looked at Althea with a little more interest.
"But what about that thing?" Seamus asked, nodding at the beast, which was now blending in with its surroundings, the Muggles remaining blissfully unaware.
"It'll be gone shortly," Hector explained. "After the mess you two made, I don't think we'll be needing your kind of help!"
Dean was still annoyed with Hector and had half a mind to tell him so, but was stopped by the sweet smile of Althea, "Oh, Hector. You really shouldn't be so hard on them! Memory Charms always prove tricky, you know that!"
Hector reddened slightly, "That was a long time ago, when I was still a trainee! Ohh, alright then, forget it..." He gave a little bow then stalked away.
Dean turned back to Althea, "Thanks..." She interrupted him with a kiss, which took him completely by surprise.
Seamus' mouth dropped open for a moment, then he grinned and looked at Dean, "Forgotten about Lavender already, have you?"
"Who is this Lavender?" Althea demanded, glancing at Seamus with annoyance.
"Just his girlfriend back home," Seamus said smiling.
Dean was saved from responding by the arrival of the Muggle police with their sirens wailing, stopping just feet from Dean, Seamus and Althea.
"What's going on here?" Chief Inspector Kosmo demanded. Hector appeared and began to calmly explain that the crowd had been disturbed by a herd of stampeding goats that broke free from their pen, but that all was well now and order had been restored. Behind his back, Dean spotted Althea discreetly slipping what appeared to be a wand inside her jacket with a satisfied smile.
Chief Inspector Kosmo began asking questions of the assembled Muggles, all of whom told the same story. The Chief Inspector nodded, saying that he'd be keeping a patrol on watch for any stray goats that might be loose. "Good you were here to help get the situation under control," the Inspector said, smiling. He saluted and headed back to his car.
"So are we ready to start searching for that egg?" Seamus asked, excitedly.
Althea hesitated, "Er... on second thought, I don't think we'll be needing your help anymore. Lavender's waiting for you, I'm sure."
Dean heard a note of jealousy in her voice but shrugged and said, "She's busy. But I suppose we do have to get going, right Seamus?"
His friend nodded in agreement. "That's right," Seamus said, "and we better get moving!" Saying their goodbyes to Althea and Hector as if the Chimaera was about to attack, they rushed to the phone booth next and grabbed their robes.
"What do we do now?" Dean asked.
"I suppose we'll head on to Greenwich," Seamus replied, looking for the portkey.
"Do you reckon we'll make it there this time round?" asked Dean.
"Leaping leprachauns!" Nestled near the base of a nearby column lay an old vase. It was cracked and badly discolored, but still intact. "On three," directed Seamus. "One, two, three!" They both touched the vase and instantly disappeared.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Dean and Seamus 'Roar' into Greece"
"We're in Greece, Seamus!" Dean stated in a bewildered tone. They both looked around, taking in the unexpected scenery. They had expected to arrive in Greenwich.
"Again? Why do we have such a hard time with portkeys?" Seamus mused. Dean was too busy looking around to answer. He had always fancied visiting Greece. They had been to Greenwich numerous times before, so he wasn't too fussed about the mistake.
They started walking. "Look at that architecture! It's amazing!" Dean stated excitedly, pointing to the ruins of an ancient temple. There were lions carved above the stone gateway, with rugged steps leading up to a walled enclosure, where some sort of festival seemed to be taking place.
"Let's find out what's going on," Dean suggested. "It could be a ceremony of magic! Do you think we could blend in with the other people here?"
Seamus looked around at the assembled throng carefully. "They're all wearing Muggle clothes. Maybe we should try and change before we head over there," he concluded. Looking to his right, he saw an anachronistic-looking telephone box which gave him an idea. "We could change in that old phone box," said Seamus, pointing. "We might stand out a wee bit if we try mingling in these robes."
The two friends made their way towards the phone booth. Suddenly, a large group of tourists ran screaming in their direction.
"Run! Run!" they were yelling frantically. "The Chimaera of Mycenae is on the rampage! It's heading this way!" Seamus and Dean bolted in the direction of the phone booth and pulled themselves through the door.
"Now what?" asked Seamus, as Dean wriggled out of his robe.
"Take yours off, too!" he directed Seamus. The pair were struggling to disrobe in the confines of the antiquated booth. "Ouch! Watch your elbows."
"MY elbows? What about yours? I'm going to have bruises."
Meanwhile panicked tourists were swarming around outside. "HELP! Somebody save us!!!"
"Let's go!!!" Dean cried. They spilled out of the booth, and charged towards the snarling creature, wands raised.
"Wait!" Seamus exclaimed. "What spell are we going to use to subdue this thing? It's meaner looking than that Antipodean Opaleye in Australia!"
Dean looked blank, momentarily. "The Conjunctivitis curse! It worked last time!" he suggested. Seamus nodded and together they pointed their wands at the approaching creature. Its vicious tail cracked like a whip as it thrashed around wildly and the two deadly spikes passed within inches of Seamus' face.
"Blimey!" he croaked, ducking. "That was close!" The Chimaera's leonine head turned in their direction.
"Now!" ordered Dean, brandishing his wand like a sword. Together they hollered the incantation, but it didn't seem to work.
"What now?" asked Seamus, ducking again as the Chimaera lurched forward suddenly, growling loudly.
"PETRIFICUS TOTALUS!" Dean roared, waving his wand at the beast just as a massive paw landed uncomfortably close to Dean's feet. Seamus chimed in, adding his voice to Dean's, but it only seemed to anger the creature. The wizards were desperate for any spell that might hinder the advancing Chimaera.
"IMPEDIMENTA!" came a shout from behind the harried duo. It was a squad of Greek Emergency Magical Creature Wranglers, Apparating all around the area. Dean cheered but his relief was short-lived. His eyes widened in fright as the terrifying creature lashed its fierce tail against some of the cobblestone path.
"Look out!" he called, narrowly avoiding the thrashing appendage.
"Dean, get back!" yelled Seamus, ducking behind a thick, stone wall. The Greek wizards seemed to be unfazed by the Chimaera and moved in to surround it. At a signal from their leader, they all yelled in unison, in Greek, "MEGALOS YPOTASSOMOS!"
Seamus and Dean stared in amazement as the Chimaera's legs buckled. A resounding "THUD" echoed around the majestic ruins as it crashed to the ground.
"Blimey! How did they manage...?" asked Dean, gobsmacked.
Hector Leandros, a stout wizard with dark hair, turned and said, "The beast will soon regain her consciousness. My squad has to bind her before she wakes."
"Your squad?" asked Dean. "Excuse me, but who are you blokes?"
"We're a squad of Emergency Magical Creature Wranglers. Our task is to return this female to a facility that ensures the safety of the local population. One of her eggs is missing though, and if we don't find it," Hector looked seriously at the boys and shook his head. "Well, there will be trouble."
Dean glanced over at the recumbent Chimaera, then at the seven Greek wizards bustling around it. "How can we help?" he asked, gesturing towards Seamus.
Hector pointed to the Muggles that were milling around curiously and whispering to each other. "How are you at Memory Charms?" he asked.
Seamus grinned. "Not bad. Better than Gilderoy Lockhart!" The man looked confused for a minute, "Who's he?"
"Never mind," Dean said, chuckling.
"Now, is that all you need us to do?" added Seamus.
Hector hesitated, then said, "After you tend to the Muggles, we could use some help locating the egg."
Dean nodded, then he and Seamus walked towards some Muggles, cowering beside the stone wall. Holding their wands aloft, they muttered the spells needed to modify memories. They convinced the Muggles that they had seen nothing unusual that day; that it had been a perfectly normal afternoon of sightseeing. One young boy asked Seamus about the festival and whether the creature being honored was as dangerous as the books said it was.
Dean and Seamus looked at him with mounting concern. They decided that they needed a stronger charm for this particular boy. He seemed to be resistant to their first attempt. He was continuing to blabber on about the beast to everyone he met! They exchanged worried glances.
"What do you think we should do?" Seamus asked.
"Obliviatemaximus, you reckon?" Dean suggested.
"Worth a try," agreed Seamus, and together they flourished their wands and uttered the incantation. A glazed look immediately fell across the face of the boy, as well as everyone who'd heard him rambling about the magnificent creature that lay peacefully, mere feet away. The Muggles continued to stare blankly past the Chimaera.
"Umm, Dean, do you reckon we overdid it a bit?" asked Seamus hesitantly.
Dean nodded. How were they going to get the Muggles acting normally again? "I suppose we could break the spell and try again," he suggested. "Or we could wait and hope it wears off a bit."
Seamus looked uncomfortable. "If we leave them they could wander off and get lost. Permanently. I think we need to fix them somehow."
Dean looked thoughtfully at the gathered crowd of people. "If we could get a Healer, maybe they could sort everyone out and make sure they're okay."
Seamus nodded, "Great idea! Where do we find one, then? It's not like they just wander about, do they?"
"Yeah, hadn't thought of that," Dean replied thoughtfully.
Hector returned just then to see how the memory modifications were proceeding. One look at the assembled crowd of blank-faced Muggles, and that told him all he needed to know. "It looks like some Healers will have to be summoned! I thought you two knew what you were doing! Idiots!"
"Hang on," Seamus said, his face reddening. "We've done our best. Some of these Muggles are thick! It's not our fault the charm didn't work!"
Hector looked at them, bewildered, muttering something in Greek under his breath. "Althea! Come here, we've got a problem on our hands."
An attractive young witch came running over. "What's the problem, Hector?" she asked, but then took one look at Dean and immediately began batting her long eyelashes. "Hi there! And who are you?" Her feminine wiles went unnoticed. Dean was still furious about being treated so badly when they were only trying to help.
"Althea! You need to help these Muggles," Hector interrupted irritably.
"Oblivion Restorum!" and with a cheeky wink at Dean, and a complicated wave of her wand, Althea restored the Muggles' memories, sans the ones with the Chimaera. Dean looked at Althea with a little more interest.
"But what about that thing?" Seamus asked, nodding at the beast, which was now blending in with its surroundings, the Muggles remaining blissfully unaware.
"It'll be gone shortly," Hector explained. "After the mess you two made, I don't think we'll be needing your kind of help!"
Dean was still annoyed with Hector and had half a mind to tell him so, but was stopped by the sweet smile of Althea, "Oh, Hector. You really shouldn't be so hard on them! Memory Charms always prove tricky, you know that!"
Hector reddened slightly, "That was a long time ago, when I was still a trainee! Ohh, alright then, forget it..." He gave a little bow then stalked away.
Dean turned back to Althea, "Thanks..." She interrupted him with a kiss, which took him completely by surprise.
Seamus' mouth dropped open for a moment, then he grinned and looked at Dean, "Forgotten about Lavender already, have you?"
"Who is this Lavender?" Althea demanded, glancing at Seamus with annoyance.
"Just his girlfriend back home," Seamus said smiling.
Dean was saved from responding by the arrival of the Muggle police with their sirens wailing, stopping just feet from Dean, Seamus and Althea.
"What's going on here?" Chief Inspector Kosmo demanded. Hector appeared and began to calmly explain that the crowd had been disturbed by a herd of stampeding goats that broke free from their pen, but that all was well now and order had been restored. Behind his back, Dean spotted Althea discreetly slipping what appeared to be a wand inside her jacket with a satisfied smile.
Chief Inspector Kosmo began asking questions of the assembled Muggles, all of whom told the same story. The Chief Inspector nodded, saying that he'd be keeping a patrol on watch for any stray goats that might be loose. "Good you were here to help get the situation under control," the Inspector said, smiling. He saluted and headed back to his car.
"So are we ready to start searching for that egg?" Seamus asked, excitedly.
Althea hesitated, "Er... on second thought, I don't think we'll be needing your help anymore. Lavender's waiting for you, I'm sure."
Dean heard a note of jealousy in her voice but shrugged and said, "She's busy. But I suppose we do have to get going, right Seamus?"
His friend nodded in agreement. "That's right," Seamus said, "and we better get moving!" Saying their goodbyes to Althea and Hector as if the Chimaera was about to attack, they rushed to the phone booth next and grabbed their robes.
"What do we do now?" Dean asked.
"I suppose we'll head on to Greenwich," Seamus replied, looking for the portkey.
"Do you reckon we'll make it there this time round?" asked Dean.
"Leaping leprachauns!" Nestled near the base of a nearby column lay an old vase. It was cracked and badly discolored, but still intact. "On three," directed Seamus. "One, two, three!" They both touched the vase and instantly disappeared.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:32 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #102 stats
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 4:59 pm
These stats were first posted by PatPat – Feb 22, 2009 2:21 am (#1102 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 102
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 367
Total Words: 1,835
Last Submission Date: #1099, February 20, 2009, 3:50 AM (Puck)
Total Time to Create Story: 21 days, 16 hours, 48 minutes
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 102
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| Potteraholic | 103 |
| Puck | 77 |
| Verity Weasley | 100 |
| PatPat | 22 |
| Quinn Crockett | 8 |
| azi | 15 |
| Phoenixfeather | 42 |
Total Submissions: 367
Total Words: 1,835
Last Submission Date: #1099, February 20, 2009, 3:50 AM (Puck)
Total Time to Create Story: 21 days, 16 hours, 48 minutes
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Mon Aug 08, 2011 5:00 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #102 post-story comments
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 5:00 pm
These post-story comments were first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 24, 2010 7:01 am (#2934 of 2960) [Edited Dec 15, 2010 1 am] on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Post-Story Comments for Story #102, Volume X,
Potty Five Words: "Dean and Seamus 'Roar' into Greece"
This story was written from January 29, 2009 to February 20, 2009. Seven writers contributed to the story, which is 1,835 words long. Four of the seven writers posted feedback and one non-participant posted her comments.
- PatPat, Feb 22, 2009 2:30 am: And so ends story #102! Well done, everyone! I must say that I truly believe that the word limits have really improved our stories. It forces us to be concise and direct and to keep the stories simple. We all need to remember a few simple things:
1) Use as few words as possible to communicate a thought. It's tough when 6 or 7 people are writing a story, but we can still try to use creative writing techniques. Show, don't tell, as PAH always says!!
2) Don't forget to indicate the speaker before or after a quote. It's easy to forget to do this when we are writing five words at a time, but it makes it less confusing both for the compiling process and for people coming in trying to catch up on a story.
3) Once again, don't forget that "Muggles" is capitalized! It may seem trivial, but it is a common word in our stories and it's helpful if we don't have to continually edit posts to fix this!
- Verity Weasley, Feb 22, 2009 3:21 am: Thanks for passing on the story-starting privilege, PAH. That was a close one, wasn't it!
I liked this story. The Seamus and Dean ones are always fun. I like how we incorporated mentions of their previous adventures, so it had a sense of continuity to it. This next story is inspired by a previous comment of PAH's when she suggested it might be interesting to write a story from the perspective of one of the 'bad guys.' And you can't get any badder than this guy!
- Phoenixfeather, Feb 22, 2009 3:41 am: This story was a lot of fun to read. It was my first Dean and Seamus adventure I got to participate in, and I look forward to the next one.
Thanks, Pat Pat, for reposting the suggestions. That's helpful.
- Potteraholic, Feb 22, 2009 1:13 pm: I agree with you PatPat on all the 'practical' things: max. word length, identifying speakers, and Muggles. As to the actual content of the story, I do love a Seamus and Dean Adventure! They remind me of the old buddy movies I watched on Sunday mornings as a child: Bob Hope and Bing Crosby's 'Road to' movies, Abbott and Costello's various shenanigans, and even the comedy of Laurel and Hardy at times (S & D's phone booth scene when they're trying to change out of their robes!); priceless!
Verity, including bits and pieces from past stories is fun, isn't it? Something Puck said when I first started posting more than a year ago, has always stuck in my mind. Something about how plot points from previous stories could always casually turn up in future stories. (Puck, of course I had to find the exact quote! (In response to my question here.) I loved the title, PatPat! And, Verity, it was a close one! When I tallied the posts, I actually thought you'd have more, since I felt like I didn't post as often as usual!
- Dryleaves, Feb 22, 2009 2:06 pm: Just want to say that I really enjoyed the previous story.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Post-Story Comments for Story #102, Volume X,
Potty Five Words: "Dean and Seamus 'Roar' into Greece"
This story was written from January 29, 2009 to February 20, 2009. Seven writers contributed to the story, which is 1,835 words long. Four of the seven writers posted feedback and one non-participant posted her comments.
- PatPat, Feb 22, 2009 2:30 am: And so ends story #102! Well done, everyone! I must say that I truly believe that the word limits have really improved our stories. It forces us to be concise and direct and to keep the stories simple. We all need to remember a few simple things:
1) Use as few words as possible to communicate a thought. It's tough when 6 or 7 people are writing a story, but we can still try to use creative writing techniques. Show, don't tell, as PAH always says!!
2) Don't forget to indicate the speaker before or after a quote. It's easy to forget to do this when we are writing five words at a time, but it makes it less confusing both for the compiling process and for people coming in trying to catch up on a story.
3) Once again, don't forget that "Muggles" is capitalized! It may seem trivial, but it is a common word in our stories and it's helpful if we don't have to continually edit posts to fix this!
- Verity Weasley, Feb 22, 2009 3:21 am: Thanks for passing on the story-starting privilege, PAH. That was a close one, wasn't it!
I liked this story. The Seamus and Dean ones are always fun. I like how we incorporated mentions of their previous adventures, so it had a sense of continuity to it. This next story is inspired by a previous comment of PAH's when she suggested it might be interesting to write a story from the perspective of one of the 'bad guys.' And you can't get any badder than this guy!
- Phoenixfeather, Feb 22, 2009 3:41 am: This story was a lot of fun to read. It was my first Dean and Seamus adventure I got to participate in, and I look forward to the next one.
Thanks, Pat Pat, for reposting the suggestions. That's helpful.
- Potteraholic, Feb 22, 2009 1:13 pm: I agree with you PatPat on all the 'practical' things: max. word length, identifying speakers, and Muggles. As to the actual content of the story, I do love a Seamus and Dean Adventure! They remind me of the old buddy movies I watched on Sunday mornings as a child: Bob Hope and Bing Crosby's 'Road to' movies, Abbott and Costello's various shenanigans, and even the comedy of Laurel and Hardy at times (S & D's phone booth scene when they're trying to change out of their robes!); priceless!
Verity, including bits and pieces from past stories is fun, isn't it? Something Puck said when I first started posting more than a year ago, has always stuck in my mind. Something about how plot points from previous stories could always casually turn up in future stories. (Puck, of course I had to find the exact quote! (In response to my question here.) I loved the title, PatPat! And, Verity, it was a close one! When I tallied the posts, I actually thought you'd have more, since I felt like I didn't post as often as usual!
- Dryleaves, Feb 22, 2009 2:06 pm: Just want to say that I really enjoyed the previous story.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Mon Aug 15, 2011 7:24 am; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #103
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 5:03 pm
This story was first posted by Potteraholic - Mar 20, 2009 10:05 am (#1504 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Young Tom Riddle took one look at his surroundings and felt a strange sensation. He could feel the magic emanating from all around and relished the moment. Looking up at the towers and turrets of the magnificent castle, he finally felt a sense of being home, of being somewhere he belonged. For the first time he felt sure his talents would serve him as they never had before. Stepping out of the little boat with a small knot of other children, he realized that they had yet one more journey to make before they would truly become a part of Hogwarts: the walk up to the huge, oak front door.
"Oi, Tom, get moving, will you!" said Edward Jones as he shoved Tom's shoulder. "Stopping right in front of me, dunderhead! Why? We're almost there!"
Tom turned to him, his gaze steady, and calmly said, "I'll stop where I please. And don't ever touch me again." Although his manner seemed relaxed, his words carried a threat far beyond appearances. Edward looked away quickly and made his way toward the front of the crowd.
Tom gazed coldly at his retreating back. He then started thinking about information he'd heard on the Express. Two boys, named Dolohov and Mulciber, had mentioned a ceremony called ‘Sorting’, but they hadn't said what it was, specifically. Their laughing voices drifted toward him from the back of the line. He slowed his pace and allowed them to catch up. "Pardon me," Tom said, smiling charmingly. "You're Mulciber, right? My name's Tom Riddle."
"Maleficus Mulciber," the boy said. "And this is Antonin Dolohov." He indicated the short, pudgy boy beside him.
All three boys shook hands solemnly, sizing each other up.
"What's the procedure once we get inside?" Tom asked, heading towards the massive doors.
Maleficus narrowed his eyes. "Don't you know? You aren't a Mudblood, are you?"
"Of course not," Tom answered quickly. He had no idea what it meant, but he realized it was undesirable. "Just heard that some changes had been made," he lied.
Antonin sniggered. "Change a centuries-old tradition? Who told you that?" he asked suspiciously.
Thinking quickly, Tom replied, "I overheard it in Diagon Alley, when I picked up my school things."
Antonin still looked suspicious, but said nothing more.
Fifteen minutes later, Tom was standing next to his new classmates waiting for his turn on the stool. He felt confident that the Sorting Hat would recognize his unique blend of talent, cunning, and power.
"Riddle, Tom," Professor Dumbledore called out, glancing toward the boy. His expression was hard to read, but Tom sensed that Dumbledore didn't have any doubts about which House the Sorting Hat would select for him. The only question was, how quickly it would provide the answer.
Tom felt the eyes of the Transfiguration professor follow him as he walked to the stool. He sat down carefully and placed the ragged-looking hat upon his head. It breathed in his ear as it began to whisper. "Hmmm, interesting. You have a great darkness within you, along with great ambition. You have extraordinary gifts, but I fear how you will use them."
"Gifts? What sort of gifts?" Tom asked.
"Don't want to give too much away now. So, Slytherin!" the Hat announced. Tom smiled and removed the hat. He looked over at Dumbledore, but the Professor's expression was unreadable. Tom walked over to the Slytherin table and sat next to the other newly sorted first years. Antonin and Maleficus were acting happy to see him but he was more interested in the staff table. The professor with a large, silvery moustache was smiling broadly at the Slytherin students. Tom wondered which classes he taught. Manipulating him, Tom would soon find out, would be easy.
Looking around the Great Hall, he noticed several shimmering figures floating in midair between the tables. Fascinated, he watched as they joined the students at the tables. Each ghost seemed to belong to a particular house. The one at the Slytherin table looked sinister and gloomy. The students near him looked a little uneasy as they tried to move away, surreptitiously. Tom noticed that the ghost's clothes were covered in silvery spots, which resembled bloodstains. He resolved to find out everything he could about this particular ghost.
Later that night, when the first-years had been escorted to their dormitory, and the other boys had fallen asleep, Tom lay awake thinking. As a plan evolved in his mind, he allowed himself a satisfied smile. He quietly slid out of bed and sneaked past the loudly snoring young Slytherins. He stepped into the common room and came upon a group of older girls. They were intent upon finishing their conversation about who would be in the Slug Club and didn't notice him. He listened intently, hidden by a large, winged, overstuffed armchair. It was clear that this club would be worth joining. It would help Tom get close to those with influence and that would help his own rise to power.
Suddenly, the door to the common room opened. Professor Slughorn entered and shooed the older girls back to their dormitories. Then he spotted Tom, half hidden behind the armchair.
"What are you doing, young man? Too excited to sleep?" Slughorn chuckled. Professor Slughorn always visited the common room on the first night of term. Tom looked momentarily startled, but regained his composure quickly. He opened his mouth, ready to explain himself but the professor held up his hand and motioned him to be silent.
"Not to worry, I was a boy once. I remember what it was like when I was your age. Why, on my first night at Hogwarts, I snuck up to the owlery and—"
"Excuse me, Professor Slughorn," Tom interrupted, hesitantly. "I was just wondering about the Slug Club. I heard those girls discussing what a fine club it was and I wondered how I become a member."
"Oho! Tom, you are an ambitious young Slytherin. No doubt you'll go far! But right now it's bedtime for you, young man! Tomorrow you will begin your classes." Slughorn guided Tom back to the boys’ dormitory. Before he left, he asked Tom which class he was most anxious to start.
"Potions," he answered, without hesitation. He was fascinated by the obvious delight in Slughorn's face.
"You'll not be disappointed, my boy," said the professor with undisguised interest. "When is your first lesson?"
Tom was pleased that Slughorn seemed to be easily manipulated. "Not until Tuesday, Professor. Do you know who the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor is, sir?"
"That would be Professor Merrythought. Now off to bed. Good night!"
Tom climbed the stairs to his dormitory. Slughorn had prevented his planned explorations, but there was time.
Over the next few weeks, Tom impressed his professors by demonstrating abilities that were far beyond those of the typical eleven-year-old. Dumbledore alone seemed to harbor reservations about his character, therefore Tom was very careful to present himself as a model student. Eventually it would not matter what Dumbledore thought, but for now Tom knew it was important to project the right image. Professor Slughorn began taking an interest in Tom almost immediately. He proclaimed Tom a gifted potioneer and promised him that he would introduce him to the Slug Club just as soon as there was an opening.
Tom decided he was going to have to 'create' an opening. The upcoming Quidditch match may well provide an opportunity. Tom strolled down to the Great Hall. He saw Antonin and Maleficus at the Slytherin table, eating breakfast. He sauntered over and dropped into a seat next to Antonin, nodding and smiling nonchalantly at him while he ate.
"Looking forward to watching the game, Tom?" Antonin asked.
Tom shrugged and said, "We've won the Quidditch Cup for the past few years, so we're bound to win today." He leaned forward conspiratorially, "Listen, do you know that Gryffindor Keeper? The one who struts around here like he's Merlin's gift to witches?"
The other boys nodded. "He's in the Slug Club, isn't he?" asked Maleficus quietly.
"Surprisingly... yes. I don't understand why. He has no extraordinary talent," Tom mused. "Anyway, he has no chance against our Chasers. And he won't be in old Sluggy's club much longer," he added with a cunning smile.
"Really?" Maleficus said, a confused expression on his face. "It sounds like you know something we don't."
Tom nodded, then leaned in even closer. "I don't want to say too much now. But just keep your eye on him during the game."
With a conspiratorial smile, he stood up and stalked away. Antonin quickly followed, wanting to be wherever the action was going to be.
The Quidditch pitch looked especially verdant in the morning sunshine. The weather was perfect for Quidditch, clear and crisp. Tom sat on the topmost row of the Slytherin stands. His eyes were fixed on the Gryffindor Keeper as both teams marched onto the field. Soon after, fourteen players got on their brooms and the game began. Before long, there was a collective gasp as the Slytherin Chaser soared across the field to escape a Bludger. She collided with the Gryffindor Beater that had sent it in her direction, sending both spiraling towards the ground at a dangerous speed.
While all eyes were on the descending pair, Tom decided that it was time to put his plan into action. Sebastian Haywood, the Gryffindor Keeper, wasn't looking when the Bludger suddenly changed its course in midair. The force of the blow knocked him off his broom. The crowd gasped as he caught hold of the center goal hoop. Sebastian hung by one hand. A tickling feeling immediately began to travel along his arm, causing him to writhe violently as he tried in vain to maintain his grip on the hoop. The teachers were distracted by the two other students already plummeting to the ground, so there didn't seem to be anyone concerned with saving Sebastian.
Nobody noticed when he lost his hold of the hoop. His echoing screams caught the attention of the students sitting nearby, to the right of the center hoop, and a Gryffindor Chaser looked back to check the hoops' defense. Seeing Sebastian spinning to the ground, she yelled for help. Dumbledore looked up, pulling out his wand, just as Sebastian crashed onto the ground. The Bludger missed him, luckily, and Dumbledore was quick to cast a Cushioning Charm just as Sebastian hit the ground. Unfortunately, the charm's full potency couldn't be realized before Sebastian's body absorbed the majority of the impact. He lay motionless, the wind knocked out of him, barely conscious. Tom suppressed a grin as he looked at the scene. The Tickling Charm he'd been practicing had paid off.
Antonin glanced at Tom in awe, "No first year can do non-verbal spells!" he exclaimed. Tom smirked. Dumbledore hurried to Sebastian, who lay completely still, his limbs splayed across the grass. Everyone else assumed the Bludger had been sent Sebastian's way accidentally, a product of competitive play. Not even Dumbledore suspected Tom had anything at all to do with it.
"Take this young man to the hospital wing," Dumbledore instructed, conjuring a stretcher. A couple of burly fifth-years carried Sebastian away as the game resumed. Without a Keeper, Gryffindor had no chance and Slytherin clobbered them convincingly.
The following day, Headmaster Dippett announced that Sebastian had been transferred to St. Mungo's. His injuries were too severe for him to continue at school so he would miss the rest of the term. After that week's Potions lesson, Slughorn cornered Tom.
"Tom m'boy!" he began warmly. "I'll be hosting a small gathering in my office tomorrow night. Just a few of the bright lights among us. I'd like you to come meet the rest of the Slug Club." Tom outwardly appeared to be humble and gracious as he accepted the invitation, but the gleam in his eye revealed a much darker side. Over Slughorn's shoulder, Antonin and Maleficus looked impressed, yet wary.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Malevolent Machinations"
Young Tom Riddle took one look at his surroundings and felt a strange sensation. He could feel the magic emanating from all around and relished the moment. Looking up at the towers and turrets of the magnificent castle, he finally felt a sense of being home, of being somewhere he belonged. For the first time he felt sure his talents would serve him as they never had before. Stepping out of the little boat with a small knot of other children, he realized that they had yet one more journey to make before they would truly become a part of Hogwarts: the walk up to the huge, oak front door.
"Oi, Tom, get moving, will you!" said Edward Jones as he shoved Tom's shoulder. "Stopping right in front of me, dunderhead! Why? We're almost there!"
Tom turned to him, his gaze steady, and calmly said, "I'll stop where I please. And don't ever touch me again." Although his manner seemed relaxed, his words carried a threat far beyond appearances. Edward looked away quickly and made his way toward the front of the crowd.
Tom gazed coldly at his retreating back. He then started thinking about information he'd heard on the Express. Two boys, named Dolohov and Mulciber, had mentioned a ceremony called ‘Sorting’, but they hadn't said what it was, specifically. Their laughing voices drifted toward him from the back of the line. He slowed his pace and allowed them to catch up. "Pardon me," Tom said, smiling charmingly. "You're Mulciber, right? My name's Tom Riddle."
"Maleficus Mulciber," the boy said. "And this is Antonin Dolohov." He indicated the short, pudgy boy beside him.
All three boys shook hands solemnly, sizing each other up.
"What's the procedure once we get inside?" Tom asked, heading towards the massive doors.
Maleficus narrowed his eyes. "Don't you know? You aren't a Mudblood, are you?"
"Of course not," Tom answered quickly. He had no idea what it meant, but he realized it was undesirable. "Just heard that some changes had been made," he lied.
Antonin sniggered. "Change a centuries-old tradition? Who told you that?" he asked suspiciously.
Thinking quickly, Tom replied, "I overheard it in Diagon Alley, when I picked up my school things."
Antonin still looked suspicious, but said nothing more.
Fifteen minutes later, Tom was standing next to his new classmates waiting for his turn on the stool. He felt confident that the Sorting Hat would recognize his unique blend of talent, cunning, and power.
"Riddle, Tom," Professor Dumbledore called out, glancing toward the boy. His expression was hard to read, but Tom sensed that Dumbledore didn't have any doubts about which House the Sorting Hat would select for him. The only question was, how quickly it would provide the answer.
Tom felt the eyes of the Transfiguration professor follow him as he walked to the stool. He sat down carefully and placed the ragged-looking hat upon his head. It breathed in his ear as it began to whisper. "Hmmm, interesting. You have a great darkness within you, along with great ambition. You have extraordinary gifts, but I fear how you will use them."
"Gifts? What sort of gifts?" Tom asked.
"Don't want to give too much away now. So, Slytherin!" the Hat announced. Tom smiled and removed the hat. He looked over at Dumbledore, but the Professor's expression was unreadable. Tom walked over to the Slytherin table and sat next to the other newly sorted first years. Antonin and Maleficus were acting happy to see him but he was more interested in the staff table. The professor with a large, silvery moustache was smiling broadly at the Slytherin students. Tom wondered which classes he taught. Manipulating him, Tom would soon find out, would be easy.
Looking around the Great Hall, he noticed several shimmering figures floating in midair between the tables. Fascinated, he watched as they joined the students at the tables. Each ghost seemed to belong to a particular house. The one at the Slytherin table looked sinister and gloomy. The students near him looked a little uneasy as they tried to move away, surreptitiously. Tom noticed that the ghost's clothes were covered in silvery spots, which resembled bloodstains. He resolved to find out everything he could about this particular ghost.
Later that night, when the first-years had been escorted to their dormitory, and the other boys had fallen asleep, Tom lay awake thinking. As a plan evolved in his mind, he allowed himself a satisfied smile. He quietly slid out of bed and sneaked past the loudly snoring young Slytherins. He stepped into the common room and came upon a group of older girls. They were intent upon finishing their conversation about who would be in the Slug Club and didn't notice him. He listened intently, hidden by a large, winged, overstuffed armchair. It was clear that this club would be worth joining. It would help Tom get close to those with influence and that would help his own rise to power.
Suddenly, the door to the common room opened. Professor Slughorn entered and shooed the older girls back to their dormitories. Then he spotted Tom, half hidden behind the armchair.
"What are you doing, young man? Too excited to sleep?" Slughorn chuckled. Professor Slughorn always visited the common room on the first night of term. Tom looked momentarily startled, but regained his composure quickly. He opened his mouth, ready to explain himself but the professor held up his hand and motioned him to be silent.
"Not to worry, I was a boy once. I remember what it was like when I was your age. Why, on my first night at Hogwarts, I snuck up to the owlery and—"
"Excuse me, Professor Slughorn," Tom interrupted, hesitantly. "I was just wondering about the Slug Club. I heard those girls discussing what a fine club it was and I wondered how I become a member."
"Oho! Tom, you are an ambitious young Slytherin. No doubt you'll go far! But right now it's bedtime for you, young man! Tomorrow you will begin your classes." Slughorn guided Tom back to the boys’ dormitory. Before he left, he asked Tom which class he was most anxious to start.
"Potions," he answered, without hesitation. He was fascinated by the obvious delight in Slughorn's face.
"You'll not be disappointed, my boy," said the professor with undisguised interest. "When is your first lesson?"
Tom was pleased that Slughorn seemed to be easily manipulated. "Not until Tuesday, Professor. Do you know who the Defense Against the Dark Arts professor is, sir?"
"That would be Professor Merrythought. Now off to bed. Good night!"
Tom climbed the stairs to his dormitory. Slughorn had prevented his planned explorations, but there was time.
Over the next few weeks, Tom impressed his professors by demonstrating abilities that were far beyond those of the typical eleven-year-old. Dumbledore alone seemed to harbor reservations about his character, therefore Tom was very careful to present himself as a model student. Eventually it would not matter what Dumbledore thought, but for now Tom knew it was important to project the right image. Professor Slughorn began taking an interest in Tom almost immediately. He proclaimed Tom a gifted potioneer and promised him that he would introduce him to the Slug Club just as soon as there was an opening.
Tom decided he was going to have to 'create' an opening. The upcoming Quidditch match may well provide an opportunity. Tom strolled down to the Great Hall. He saw Antonin and Maleficus at the Slytherin table, eating breakfast. He sauntered over and dropped into a seat next to Antonin, nodding and smiling nonchalantly at him while he ate.
"Looking forward to watching the game, Tom?" Antonin asked.
Tom shrugged and said, "We've won the Quidditch Cup for the past few years, so we're bound to win today." He leaned forward conspiratorially, "Listen, do you know that Gryffindor Keeper? The one who struts around here like he's Merlin's gift to witches?"
The other boys nodded. "He's in the Slug Club, isn't he?" asked Maleficus quietly.
"Surprisingly... yes. I don't understand why. He has no extraordinary talent," Tom mused. "Anyway, he has no chance against our Chasers. And he won't be in old Sluggy's club much longer," he added with a cunning smile.
"Really?" Maleficus said, a confused expression on his face. "It sounds like you know something we don't."
Tom nodded, then leaned in even closer. "I don't want to say too much now. But just keep your eye on him during the game."
With a conspiratorial smile, he stood up and stalked away. Antonin quickly followed, wanting to be wherever the action was going to be.
The Quidditch pitch looked especially verdant in the morning sunshine. The weather was perfect for Quidditch, clear and crisp. Tom sat on the topmost row of the Slytherin stands. His eyes were fixed on the Gryffindor Keeper as both teams marched onto the field. Soon after, fourteen players got on their brooms and the game began. Before long, there was a collective gasp as the Slytherin Chaser soared across the field to escape a Bludger. She collided with the Gryffindor Beater that had sent it in her direction, sending both spiraling towards the ground at a dangerous speed.
While all eyes were on the descending pair, Tom decided that it was time to put his plan into action. Sebastian Haywood, the Gryffindor Keeper, wasn't looking when the Bludger suddenly changed its course in midair. The force of the blow knocked him off his broom. The crowd gasped as he caught hold of the center goal hoop. Sebastian hung by one hand. A tickling feeling immediately began to travel along his arm, causing him to writhe violently as he tried in vain to maintain his grip on the hoop. The teachers were distracted by the two other students already plummeting to the ground, so there didn't seem to be anyone concerned with saving Sebastian.
Nobody noticed when he lost his hold of the hoop. His echoing screams caught the attention of the students sitting nearby, to the right of the center hoop, and a Gryffindor Chaser looked back to check the hoops' defense. Seeing Sebastian spinning to the ground, she yelled for help. Dumbledore looked up, pulling out his wand, just as Sebastian crashed onto the ground. The Bludger missed him, luckily, and Dumbledore was quick to cast a Cushioning Charm just as Sebastian hit the ground. Unfortunately, the charm's full potency couldn't be realized before Sebastian's body absorbed the majority of the impact. He lay motionless, the wind knocked out of him, barely conscious. Tom suppressed a grin as he looked at the scene. The Tickling Charm he'd been practicing had paid off.
Antonin glanced at Tom in awe, "No first year can do non-verbal spells!" he exclaimed. Tom smirked. Dumbledore hurried to Sebastian, who lay completely still, his limbs splayed across the grass. Everyone else assumed the Bludger had been sent Sebastian's way accidentally, a product of competitive play. Not even Dumbledore suspected Tom had anything at all to do with it.
"Take this young man to the hospital wing," Dumbledore instructed, conjuring a stretcher. A couple of burly fifth-years carried Sebastian away as the game resumed. Without a Keeper, Gryffindor had no chance and Slytherin clobbered them convincingly.
The following day, Headmaster Dippett announced that Sebastian had been transferred to St. Mungo's. His injuries were too severe for him to continue at school so he would miss the rest of the term. After that week's Potions lesson, Slughorn cornered Tom.
"Tom m'boy!" he began warmly. "I'll be hosting a small gathering in my office tomorrow night. Just a few of the bright lights among us. I'd like you to come meet the rest of the Slug Club." Tom outwardly appeared to be humble and gracious as he accepted the invitation, but the gleam in his eye revealed a much darker side. Over Slughorn's shoulder, Antonin and Maleficus looked impressed, yet wary.
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:32 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #103 stats
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 5:06 pm
These stats were first posted by Potteraholic – Mar 20, 2009 10:10 am (#1505 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Statistics for Story 103
ordered by first contribution to the story
The user in red is the rightful starter of the next story. They are welcome to pass on the privilege to the user who posted the second most number of times, who may in turn pass it to the user who posted the third number of times in the story, and so forth.
Total Submissions: 400
Total Words: 2000
Last Submission Date: #1503, March 18, 2009, 9:28 AM (Puck)
Total Time to Create Story: 24 days, 6 hours, 7 minutes
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Statistics for Story 103
ordered by first contribution to the story
User | # of Submissions |
| Verity Weasley | 95 |
| Phoenixfeather | 54 |
| PatPat | 34 |
| Dryleaves | 24 |
| Potteraholic | 86 |
| Puck | 92 |
| Julia H. | 4 |
Total Submissions: 400
Total Words: 2000
Last Submission Date: #1503, March 18, 2009, 9:28 AM (Puck)
Total Time to Create Story: 24 days, 6 hours, 7 minutes
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
- Posts : 4241
Join date : 2011-02-18
Location : USA
Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #103 post-story comments
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 5:09 pm
These post-story comments were first posted by Potteraholic - Nov 24, 2010 7:02 am (#2935 of 2960) [Edited Dec 17, 2010 12 am] on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Post-Story Comments for Story #103, Volume X,
Potty Five Words: "Malevolent Machinations"
This story was written from February 22, 2009 to March 18, 2009. Seven writers contributed to the story, which is 2,000 words long. Three of the seven writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Mar 20, 2009 10:11 am: This story rambled a bit in the middle, I think, but we wrapped it up well enough at the end, and even fit it all in 2,000 words!
- Verity Weasley, Mar 20, 2009 10:54 am: Wow, I can't believe that story took almost a month to finish! We have had some very quiet times on here lately but I didn't realise it had been that long. I agree PAH that it did ramble a little bit in the middle when we weren't quite sure where the story was going. Once we had an idea of a possible direction it picked up again and finished strongly.
- Phoenixfeather, Mar 20, 2009 2:21 pm: I think the last story was a good read! The first part introduced Tom to Hogwarts and revealed his character well, while the second part was exciting and action-packed. And the transition seemed to flow well. I could see where the direction of the story could have gotten lost in the middle, but I agree that providing direction for it helped a lot!
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Post-Story Comments for Story #103, Volume X,
Potty Five Words: "Malevolent Machinations"
This story was written from February 22, 2009 to March 18, 2009. Seven writers contributed to the story, which is 2,000 words long. Three of the seven writers posted feedback.
- Potteraholic, Mar 20, 2009 10:11 am: This story rambled a bit in the middle, I think, but we wrapped it up well enough at the end, and even fit it all in 2,000 words!
- Verity Weasley, Mar 20, 2009 10:54 am: Wow, I can't believe that story took almost a month to finish! We have had some very quiet times on here lately but I didn't realise it had been that long. I agree PAH that it did ramble a little bit in the middle when we weren't quite sure where the story was going. Once we had an idea of a possible direction it picked up again and finished strongly.
- Phoenixfeather, Mar 20, 2009 2:21 pm: I think the last story was a good read! The first part introduced Tom to Hogwarts and revealed his character well, while the second part was exciting and action-packed. And the transition seemed to flow well. I could see where the direction of the story could have gotten lost in the middle, but I agree that providing direction for it helped a lot!
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Last edited by Potteraholic on Mon Aug 15, 2011 7:25 am; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Archive of Five Words Stories - Volume X, Story #104
Potteraholic Mon Aug 08, 2011 5:11 pm
This story was first posted by Potteraholic - Mar 25, 2009 12:45 am (#1835 of 2998) on the World Crossing home of the 'Harry Potter Lexicon Forum'.
Dedalus Diggle settled into the Dursleys' car, next to Dudley whose massive size made him a somewhat undesirable seat partner. "They're not very spacious, these cars," he said, trying to fit himself in comfortably. To Dudley's, right sat Petunia.
Hestia Jones climbed into the car. She wouldn't have to worry about space, as she sat in the front passenger seat so she could direct Vernon to the spot that had been chosen by the Order for the Disapparation. Dedalus tried to chat with Petunia, but received only hysterical squeals in response.
"My dear woman, there's no need to be concerned about the journey. We will be perfectly safe, I promise."
Vernon grunted from the driver's seat. None of this felt perfectly safe to him. "Well, I don't see why we need to leave in the first place. I told Harry that Lord Thingy would have to get past our burglar alarm system if he wanted to—"
"Burglar alarm system!" Hestia cast an incredulous look at him. "Do you seriously believe that You-Know-Who or any other wizard would be stopped by one of those Muggle things? Merlin's pants! You have absolutely no idea what's going on, do you?"
"I know that having one of your lot in our house was nothing I'd wish on my worst enemy!" Vernon retorted.
Hestia looked completely disgusted. She had never liked what she'd heard about Harry's Muggle relatives, but this one was the worst of the three.
"Anyone hungry?" Dedalus asked in an attempt to change the subject.
"I am!" Dudley shouted.
"Oh, Diddykins, you— " Petunia began but Dedalus' wand conjured up some pumpkin pasties and she gasped as Dudley eagerly grabbed them and stuffed them in his mouth, one after the other. Petunia seemed to stare at the wand in horror as if it reminded her of a time she didn't want to remember.
"Put that ruddy thing away!" Vernon blurted out angrily. "I won't tolerate this... abnormality... in my car!"
Petunia blinked and looked away as Hestia announced they'd arrived. "Here?" Petunia shrieked. They were in a dingy street, on the outskirts of the town of her childhood.
"This is where that horrible boy lived!"
Hestia sighed as she reminded the Dursleys they made an agreement. “You’re in our care, remember?”
Dudley belched loudly and the aroma of pumpkin filled the air. "What boy, Mum?"
"Never mind," Petunia huffed, frowning.
Dedalus smiled and nodded. "Petunia, I know why you're concerned. Disapparating takes some getting used to. But don't worry. Ah! There you are!"
A square-jawed wizard was standing by an old, rundown set of swings. Petunia ran around the car to stand next to Dudley. "Diddykins, don't worry. Mummy won't let them hurt you."
Vernon's vein was popping. "I'm warning you... if you try any funny business—"
"Now, now," said Sturgis, approaching the car, "We're just trying to help."
"This place!" Petunia repeated. "It just reminds me of... her." She looked at Vernon, anguish in her eyes. Just then, a swing began to creak in the wind and the three wizards looked fondly at it.
"Lily was always showing off on that thing, flying off every chance she could," Petunia said, her voice quavering.
"Time to go, I know; but she's here, Petunia," stated Hestia with a gentle nod.
"Hestia, we've got to hurry!" Dedalus urged, motioning the Dursleys toward Sturgis, who smiled.
"Ready?"
The Dursleys squeezed closer together unsure of what to expect. Dedalus smiled encouragingly. "Now each of you take hold of one of us," he said.
Vernon looked horrified by the idea. "Isn't there any other way for us to get there?" he asked, brusquely.
"No," replied Sturgis flatly. He was losing patience and they needed to get going.
Dudley stepped forward and gripped Sturgis' arm. "I'm ready," he said. Dedalus reached for Vernon's arm, but the Muggle elbowed him away and reached for Hestia. The wizard said nothing, but took a firm grip of Petunia instead. Checking his watch he gave the signal to the others. "On three... one... two... THREE!"
Vernon, Petunia, and Dudley braced themselves. A strange compressive blackness enveloped them and sensation came over them, and they began to panic, as their breathing suddenly became labored. Abruptly, they emerged from the journey. "What the bloody hell was that?" demanded Vernon, staggering to his feet. "Perfectly safe?! You people are bloody insane!" Dedalus giggled, glancing at Hestia and Sturgis, who both were suppressing grins.
"Dudders! Are you alright?" called Petunia, who was crumpled on the ground. Sturgis reached down and helped her up. She winced but his eyes were kind. She brushed the dust off her salmon pink skirt and looked around. They were in a small, walled garden facing a ramshackle cottage. A patch of lilies grew wild on the side where a pond teeming with fish was visible.
"Isn't this lovely?" beamed Dedalus.
Dudley belched; unfortunately, this time the aroma from the pasties was gone. “Where are we Mr. ...Wizard?”
"My aunt's cottage," Dedalus enthused, "and call me Dedalus." He looked around contentedly and gestured towards the brightly painted door. Petunia and Vernon glanced at each other, eyes narrowed.
"We're in Gloucester," Hestia explained. "The house has been given protective charms so that You-Know-Who and his followers won't be able to find you. Let's go inside!"
This was too much for Vernon to bear. "Just wait! What do you mean, charms? More blasted hocus pocus?! I've had it!"
"I'm going inside, Dad. It's cold out here!"
Sturgis, who was casting a Muffliato charm, held Dudley back for a moment and said, "Some tea should warm you, and a fire, and how 'bout some more pumpkin pasties? Big bloke like yourself, after a long journey, Disapparating and all."
"I liked it. But a cuppa does sound like a good idea," Dudley nodded. He entered the cottage slowly.
"Wait for Mummy and Dad!" Petunia shrieked. She and Vernon rushed over as Dudley opened the door. They followed him inside, looking around warily.
"Make yourselves at home," Dedalus said. "You'll be here for a while."
Hestia entered and immediately went to the fireplace. She waved her wand, and a cheery fire started blazing instantly. Vernon, obviously reluctant to approach a fire conjured from nowhere stood at the far end of the room. Petunia dusted off a stool before cautiously taking a seat. Only Dudley seemed perfectly at ease, enjoying the hearth, going over, and sitting on the couch next to it. Dedalus made tea for six appear on the table. Sturgis began to pour. "Cream and sugar?" He turned to Petunia politely and offered the cup.
She reluctantly accepted it but said quietly, "Lovely china."
Vernon looked horrified. "Petunia, don't fall for their... charms!" he roared from the corner.
Petunia jumped and turned to him. "Vernon, we have to make the best of it."
"But, Petunia..." Vernon replied.
"What else can we do?”
"Well said," Hestia chimed in.
"Dad, the tea's really good! It's sweet, just like you prefer it. The best I've ever had." Vernon scowled but realized he was defeated. He stomped across the room, grabbed a teacup, and went back to his corner. The wizards exchanged relieved glances.
Soon Hestia sat down next to Petunia. "I haven't told you before but I knew your sister, and she was one of the kindest people I've ever met."
Petunia looked uncomfortable and was saved from replying by Vernon, who charged over and hissed, "That's enough!"
Dedalus, who feared Vernon was losing control, quickly interjected. "Lily wouldn't wish her family to be upset."
"Family?" Vernon repeated incredulously.
"Vernon," Petunia interrupted sternly, "let's have a look around." She stood up quickly, smoothed down her skirt, and waited for Vernon and Dudley to follow.
Dedalus bounced up from his seat. "The kitchen is right this way!" he said, bowing to Petunia, his mauve top hat nearly touching the floor. "Please come with me." Dedalus hummed as he walked through a narrow doorway into a cozy kitchen. Fresh flowers were on the moonlit table. Petunia desperately wanted to scrub every surface. Dedalus waved his wand and lamps flickered to light.
"What's that?" Petunia pointed to a peculiar looking contraption by the sink.
"That's a Magical Mess Remover," Dedalus explained.
"Magic is a mess!" Vernon interjected, coming into the room.
But Petunia could not take her eyes off the machine. "You mean it's for...cleaning?" Her trembling hand was slowly caressing the gleaming metal.
"Yes," said Dedalus, "my aunt was not very adept at household spells, but she had a soft spot for these clever objects. They helped her get everything spotless!"
"How does it work?" asked Petunia, interested despite herself, and Vernon's loud snort.
"Lavandus Totalis!" Dedalus exclaimed, without moving his hands or lifting his wand.
The machine began making a soft humming noise and Petunia moved closer to get a better look. "Can I try it?" she asked.
"Yes. This is one of the few spells non-magical folk can perform. You stop it thus: Lavandum Finitus!"
Petunia looked at the result of the gadget. "My word," she gasped. "There's not a stain to speak of!"
Vernon groaned.
But Petunia was beaming. "Lavandus Totalis!" she shouted, her horsy teeth bared in a broad, maniacal grin.
"Perfect!" squeaked Dedalus. "You're quite a natural, my dear!"
Vernon groaned again. "Petunia! What's gotten into you?" he bellowed.
Petunia was so entranced that she didn't hear him. "Lavandum Finitus!" she said clearly, watching happily as the gadget came to rest.
"Magic words sound musical, don't they Mum? Dudley mused.
Vernon reddened and marched toward his son. But Petunia stopped him by saying, "Vernon, wouldn't it be nice to have one at home?" Pulling at his moustache, Vernon sank into a chair, speechless.
Smiling, Dedalus turned to Petunia and said, "Lily would've loved to hear you say that, Petunia."
Petunia nodded. "Yes, I believe she would."
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
Potty Five Words: "Driving and Disapparation to... Destination, Unknown"
Dedalus Diggle settled into the Dursleys' car, next to Dudley whose massive size made him a somewhat undesirable seat partner. "They're not very spacious, these cars," he said, trying to fit himself in comfortably. To Dudley's, right sat Petunia.
Hestia Jones climbed into the car. She wouldn't have to worry about space, as she sat in the front passenger seat so she could direct Vernon to the spot that had been chosen by the Order for the Disapparation. Dedalus tried to chat with Petunia, but received only hysterical squeals in response.
"My dear woman, there's no need to be concerned about the journey. We will be perfectly safe, I promise."
Vernon grunted from the driver's seat. None of this felt perfectly safe to him. "Well, I don't see why we need to leave in the first place. I told Harry that Lord Thingy would have to get past our burglar alarm system if he wanted to—"
"Burglar alarm system!" Hestia cast an incredulous look at him. "Do you seriously believe that You-Know-Who or any other wizard would be stopped by one of those Muggle things? Merlin's pants! You have absolutely no idea what's going on, do you?"
"I know that having one of your lot in our house was nothing I'd wish on my worst enemy!" Vernon retorted.
Hestia looked completely disgusted. She had never liked what she'd heard about Harry's Muggle relatives, but this one was the worst of the three.
"Anyone hungry?" Dedalus asked in an attempt to change the subject.
"I am!" Dudley shouted.
"Oh, Diddykins, you— " Petunia began but Dedalus' wand conjured up some pumpkin pasties and she gasped as Dudley eagerly grabbed them and stuffed them in his mouth, one after the other. Petunia seemed to stare at the wand in horror as if it reminded her of a time she didn't want to remember.
"Put that ruddy thing away!" Vernon blurted out angrily. "I won't tolerate this... abnormality... in my car!"
Petunia blinked and looked away as Hestia announced they'd arrived. "Here?" Petunia shrieked. They were in a dingy street, on the outskirts of the town of her childhood.
"This is where that horrible boy lived!"
Hestia sighed as she reminded the Dursleys they made an agreement. “You’re in our care, remember?”
Dudley belched loudly and the aroma of pumpkin filled the air. "What boy, Mum?"
"Never mind," Petunia huffed, frowning.
Dedalus smiled and nodded. "Petunia, I know why you're concerned. Disapparating takes some getting used to. But don't worry. Ah! There you are!"
A square-jawed wizard was standing by an old, rundown set of swings. Petunia ran around the car to stand next to Dudley. "Diddykins, don't worry. Mummy won't let them hurt you."
Vernon's vein was popping. "I'm warning you... if you try any funny business—"
"Now, now," said Sturgis, approaching the car, "We're just trying to help."
"This place!" Petunia repeated. "It just reminds me of... her." She looked at Vernon, anguish in her eyes. Just then, a swing began to creak in the wind and the three wizards looked fondly at it.
"Lily was always showing off on that thing, flying off every chance she could," Petunia said, her voice quavering.
"Time to go, I know; but she's here, Petunia," stated Hestia with a gentle nod.
"Hestia, we've got to hurry!" Dedalus urged, motioning the Dursleys toward Sturgis, who smiled.
"Ready?"
The Dursleys squeezed closer together unsure of what to expect. Dedalus smiled encouragingly. "Now each of you take hold of one of us," he said.
Vernon looked horrified by the idea. "Isn't there any other way for us to get there?" he asked, brusquely.
"No," replied Sturgis flatly. He was losing patience and they needed to get going.
Dudley stepped forward and gripped Sturgis' arm. "I'm ready," he said. Dedalus reached for Vernon's arm, but the Muggle elbowed him away and reached for Hestia. The wizard said nothing, but took a firm grip of Petunia instead. Checking his watch he gave the signal to the others. "On three... one... two... THREE!"
Vernon, Petunia, and Dudley braced themselves. A strange compressive blackness enveloped them and sensation came over them, and they began to panic, as their breathing suddenly became labored. Abruptly, they emerged from the journey. "What the bloody hell was that?" demanded Vernon, staggering to his feet. "Perfectly safe?! You people are bloody insane!" Dedalus giggled, glancing at Hestia and Sturgis, who both were suppressing grins.
"Dudders! Are you alright?" called Petunia, who was crumpled on the ground. Sturgis reached down and helped her up. She winced but his eyes were kind. She brushed the dust off her salmon pink skirt and looked around. They were in a small, walled garden facing a ramshackle cottage. A patch of lilies grew wild on the side where a pond teeming with fish was visible.
"Isn't this lovely?" beamed Dedalus.
Dudley belched; unfortunately, this time the aroma from the pasties was gone. “Where are we Mr. ...Wizard?”
"My aunt's cottage," Dedalus enthused, "and call me Dedalus." He looked around contentedly and gestured towards the brightly painted door. Petunia and Vernon glanced at each other, eyes narrowed.
"We're in Gloucester," Hestia explained. "The house has been given protective charms so that You-Know-Who and his followers won't be able to find you. Let's go inside!"
This was too much for Vernon to bear. "Just wait! What do you mean, charms? More blasted hocus pocus?! I've had it!"
"I'm going inside, Dad. It's cold out here!"
Sturgis, who was casting a Muffliato charm, held Dudley back for a moment and said, "Some tea should warm you, and a fire, and how 'bout some more pumpkin pasties? Big bloke like yourself, after a long journey, Disapparating and all."
"I liked it. But a cuppa does sound like a good idea," Dudley nodded. He entered the cottage slowly.
"Wait for Mummy and Dad!" Petunia shrieked. She and Vernon rushed over as Dudley opened the door. They followed him inside, looking around warily.
"Make yourselves at home," Dedalus said. "You'll be here for a while."
Hestia entered and immediately went to the fireplace. She waved her wand, and a cheery fire started blazing instantly. Vernon, obviously reluctant to approach a fire conjured from nowhere stood at the far end of the room. Petunia dusted off a stool before cautiously taking a seat. Only Dudley seemed perfectly at ease, enjoying the hearth, going over, and sitting on the couch next to it. Dedalus made tea for six appear on the table. Sturgis began to pour. "Cream and sugar?" He turned to Petunia politely and offered the cup.
She reluctantly accepted it but said quietly, "Lovely china."
Vernon looked horrified. "Petunia, don't fall for their... charms!" he roared from the corner.
Petunia jumped and turned to him. "Vernon, we have to make the best of it."
"But, Petunia..." Vernon replied.
"What else can we do?”
"Well said," Hestia chimed in.
"Dad, the tea's really good! It's sweet, just like you prefer it. The best I've ever had." Vernon scowled but realized he was defeated. He stomped across the room, grabbed a teacup, and went back to his corner. The wizards exchanged relieved glances.
Soon Hestia sat down next to Petunia. "I haven't told you before but I knew your sister, and she was one of the kindest people I've ever met."
Petunia looked uncomfortable and was saved from replying by Vernon, who charged over and hissed, "That's enough!"
Dedalus, who feared Vernon was losing control, quickly interjected. "Lily wouldn't wish her family to be upset."
"Family?" Vernon repeated incredulously.
"Vernon," Petunia interrupted sternly, "let's have a look around." She stood up quickly, smoothed down her skirt, and waited for Vernon and Dudley to follow.
Dedalus bounced up from his seat. "The kitchen is right this way!" he said, bowing to Petunia, his mauve top hat nearly touching the floor. "Please come with me." Dedalus hummed as he walked through a narrow doorway into a cozy kitchen. Fresh flowers were on the moonlit table. Petunia desperately wanted to scrub every surface. Dedalus waved his wand and lamps flickered to light.
"What's that?" Petunia pointed to a peculiar looking contraption by the sink.
"That's a Magical Mess Remover," Dedalus explained.
"Magic is a mess!" Vernon interjected, coming into the room.
But Petunia could not take her eyes off the machine. "You mean it's for...cleaning?" Her trembling hand was slowly caressing the gleaming metal.
"Yes," said Dedalus, "my aunt was not very adept at household spells, but she had a soft spot for these clever objects. They helped her get everything spotless!"
"How does it work?" asked Petunia, interested despite herself, and Vernon's loud snort.
"Lavandus Totalis!" Dedalus exclaimed, without moving his hands or lifting his wand.
The machine began making a soft humming noise and Petunia moved closer to get a better look. "Can I try it?" she asked.
"Yes. This is one of the few spells non-magical folk can perform. You stop it thus: Lavandum Finitus!"
Petunia looked at the result of the gadget. "My word," she gasped. "There's not a stain to speak of!"
Vernon groaned.
But Petunia was beaming. "Lavandus Totalis!" she shouted, her horsy teeth bared in a broad, maniacal grin.
"Perfect!" squeaked Dedalus. "You're quite a natural, my dear!"
Vernon groaned again. "Petunia! What's gotten into you?" he bellowed.
Petunia was so entranced that she didn't hear him. "Lavandum Finitus!" she said clearly, watching happily as the gadget came to rest.
"Magic words sound musical, don't they Mum? Dudley mused.
Vernon reddened and marched toward his son. But Petunia stopped him by saying, "Vernon, wouldn't it be nice to have one at home?" Pulling at his moustache, Vernon sank into a chair, speechless.
Smiling, Dedalus turned to Petunia and said, "Lily would've loved to hear you say that, Petunia."
Petunia nodded. "Yes, I believe she would."
* Five Words – Volume 10 Index *
* Five Words - Volumes Index *
| * Five Words - Main Archives * |
| * Five Words - Stories Index (by topic) * |
Last edited by Potteraholic on Fri Aug 12, 2011 9:33 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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