Potty Game: Five Words (Vol. XV)
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Julia H.
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Story #139
give it to you this
Thanks PAH! Yes, it's the first day of term today, (and youngest son's birthday!). I need to get going.
Thanks PAH! Yes, it's the first day of term today, (and youngest son's birthday!). I need to get going.
Verity Weasley- N.E.W.T.
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Story #139
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morning."
"Thanks, Lily. It's brilliant!
Methinks Sev needs to ask Lily for her help pretty quickish, if he wants her help, or this story might start to d-r-a-g...
Happy Birthday to Verity's younger son!
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morning."
"Thanks, Lily. It's brilliant!
Methinks Sev needs to ask Lily for her help pretty quickish, if he wants her help, or this story might start to d-r-a-g...
Happy Birthday to Verity's younger son!
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Story #139
" He looked up. Lily's companions
Thanks for the PM, PAH.
- Spoiler:
- had drifted away...or something
Thanks for the PM, PAH.
Mona- Hufflepuff Prefect
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Story #139
had drifted away, so he
Verity Weasley- N.E.W.T.
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Story#139
finally plucked up the courage
Congratulations, Verity! Where can I get your book?
Congratulations, Verity! Where can I get your book?
Julia H.- Prefect
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Story #139
to ask, "Can you come
Mona- Hufflepuff Prefect
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help me make a potion?
IMHO, we should actually name this potion soon in the story... as it's just been mentioned in some poster's notes. Sev has never actually said what it is he's thinking of making, and I know he's off to do some research in the library... but does he have any idea? Narrowed down the choices in his head? Reading over the story so far, it seems like he's got some notion, to me at least. We need specifics, folks. (Vagueness is what makes a story drag.)
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help me make a potion?
IMHO, we should actually name this potion soon in the story... as it's just been mentioned in some poster's notes. Sev has never actually said what it is he's thinking of making, and I know he's off to do some research in the library... but does he have any idea? Narrowed down the choices in his head? Reading over the story so far, it seems like he's got some notion, to me at least. We need specifics, folks. (Vagueness is what makes a story drag.)
I just realized, with the 5 of us who are currently posting, some big things are happening: packing/moving to a new home/new country and/or starting school, going on holiday, spending time with family after an absence... so maybe this story will be finished when Pottermore is open to one and all. Would be quite fitting, when Sev gets to attend his first Slug Club do.Potteraholic wrote: I wonder if we'll finish this story before the start of term at Hogwarts.
Last edited by Potteraholic on Mon Aug 08, 2011 9:23 am; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Story#139
"
"Anything you want," Lily smiled
Sorry, I couldn't resist.
PAH, I've followed your idea.
"Anything you want," Lily smiled
- Spoiler:
- "
... laughing or gleefully" is how I imagine her to say this.
Sorry, I couldn't resist.
PAH, I've followed your idea.
Last edited by Julia H. on Mon Aug 08, 2011 9:30 am; edited 2 times in total
Julia H.- Prefect
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. "Which one?"
"Well," Severus began,
Edit: Julia, I wanted to get going with the story... but you could always have: "Anything you want," Lily smiled. Just an idea.
Off to work on the next update.
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. "Which one?"
"Well," Severus began,
Edit: Julia, I wanted to get going with the story... but you could always have: "Anything you want," Lily smiled. Just an idea.
Off to work on the next update.
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Euphoria."
"Okay," Lily answered. "Why
No probs. Mona.
Okay, Julia, re: 'smiled Lily.' Also, did you see Denise's message here in the 'Efforts to Archive' thread? You should take a look.
I hope someone else drops in to post in this section, as this Euphoria potion idea is not really fixed firmly in my mind, and I don't want to write stalling posts. I know there's plenty of explanation about it, so I'll just leave it to those who are more set with it than I am.
I will edit it an update here in a bit, in case anyone needs it, then I'm off to finish reformatting Volume X's stories.
Verity, I love your new pic... the proud author with her first literary baby!
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Euphoria."
"Okay," Lily answered. "Why
No probs. Mona.
Okay, Julia, re: 'smiled Lily.' Also, did you see Denise's message here in the 'Efforts to Archive' thread? You should take a look.
I hope someone else drops in to post in this section, as this Euphoria potion idea is not really fixed firmly in my mind, and I don't want to write stalling posts. I know there's plenty of explanation about it, so I'll just leave it to those who are more set with it than I am.
I will edit it an update here in a bit, in case anyone needs it, then I'm off to finish reformatting Volume X's stories.
Verity, I love your new pic... the proud author with her first literary baby!
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Story#139
do you think you need
Lexicon info:
ingredients: includes a sprig of peppermint in the Half-Blood Prince's version
Effect: Induces euphoria in the drinker, with occasional side effects of excessive singing and nose-tweaking (the peppermint would tend to counterbalance that effect) (HBP22)
When correctly made, the potion is sunshine-yellow (appropriate, being a colour suggestive of cheerfulness) (HBP22)
Instructions to brew this potion can be found in Advanced Potion-Making (HBP22)
This is one of the potions the HBP improved with an idea of his own, so he probably made it at some point.
Thanks, PAH! Now I have to choose a house.
Lexicon info:
ingredients: includes a sprig of peppermint in the Half-Blood Prince's version
Effect: Induces euphoria in the drinker, with occasional side effects of excessive singing and nose-tweaking (the peppermint would tend to counterbalance that effect) (HBP22)
When correctly made, the potion is sunshine-yellow (appropriate, being a colour suggestive of cheerfulness) (HBP22)
Instructions to brew this potion can be found in Advanced Potion-Making (HBP22)
This is one of the potions the HBP improved with an idea of his own, so he probably made it at some point.
Thanks, PAH! Now I have to choose a house.
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to make it? Slughorn hasn't
Julia.
Okay, I need to clarify something for the update. Are they still in the Great Hall? Or did Sev make it to the library, and thensaw see Lily and the others there later, by coincidence?
This is the section in question:
Severus' thoughts were interrupted by a loud clatter behind him. Someone had dropped a goblet of pumpkin juice. Sticky, orange fluid was rapidly staining the tablecloth, and Severus watched its progress absentmindedly. He smiled slowly, the answer unfolding in his mind, like a tapestry. What solution could make that completely obtuse Slughorn agree to my wishes? Perhaps... a potion? I could surprise him with a bottle of mead? To which I've added a drop of... what? Leaving his half-finished lunch, Severus hurried to the library to look up a recipe. * As he walked to the double doors, he heard someone shout his name. It was Lily, with a bunch of Gryffindor girls and fellow Slug Club members. He waited awkwardly as the group approached. He wished Lily would just hurry up and ditch her entourage.
Severus' thoughts were interrupted by a loud clatter behind him. Someone had dropped a goblet of pumpkin juice. Sticky, orange fluid was rapidly staining the tablecloth, and Severus watched its progress absentmindedly. He smiled slowly, the answer unfolding in his mind, like a tapestry. What solution could make that completely obtuse Slughorn agree to my wishes? Perhaps... a potion? I could surprise him with a bottle of mead? To which I've added a drop of... what? Leaving his half-finished lunch, Severus hurried to the library to look up a recipe.
As he walkedto the double out the library doors, he heard someone shout his name. It was Lily, with a bunch of Gryffindor girls and fellow Slug Club members. He waited awkwardly as the group approached. He wished Lily would just hurry up and ditch her entourage.
If I add a paragraph break after recipe *, then it makes it seem that he's gone to the library, done his research, and found the recipe for the potion. Without it, it's a bit unclear where everyone is, to my mind. I'll leave it without a paragraph break now, in the update, but would appreciate others' thoughts. Thanks.
story update #6
EDIT: Inserted a paragraph break and changed some words to clarify the setting. The original words were in my post here.
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to make it? Slughorn hasn't
Julia.
Okay, I need to clarify something for the update. Are they still in the Great Hall? Or did Sev make it to the library, and then
This is the section in question:
Severus' thoughts were interrupted by a loud clatter behind him. Someone had dropped a goblet of pumpkin juice. Sticky, orange fluid was rapidly staining the tablecloth, and Severus watched its progress absentmindedly. He smiled slowly, the answer unfolding in his mind, like a tapestry. What solution could make that completely obtuse Slughorn agree to my wishes? Perhaps... a potion? I could surprise him with a bottle of mead? To which I've added a drop of... what? Leaving his half-finished lunch, Severus hurried to the library to look up a recipe. * As he walked to the double doors, he heard someone shout his name. It was Lily, with a bunch of Gryffindor girls and fellow Slug Club members. He waited awkwardly as the group approached. He wished Lily would just hurry up and ditch her entourage.
Severus' thoughts were interrupted by a loud clatter behind him. Someone had dropped a goblet of pumpkin juice. Sticky, orange fluid was rapidly staining the tablecloth, and Severus watched its progress absentmindedly. He smiled slowly, the answer unfolding in his mind, like a tapestry. What solution could make that completely obtuse Slughorn agree to my wishes? Perhaps... a potion? I could surprise him with a bottle of mead? To which I've added a drop of... what? Leaving his half-finished lunch, Severus hurried to the library to look up a recipe.
As he walked
If I add a paragraph break after recipe *, then it makes it seem that he's gone to the library, done his research, and found the recipe for the potion. Without it, it's a bit unclear where everyone is, to my mind. I'll leave it without a paragraph break now, in the update, but would appreciate others' thoughts. Thanks.
story update #6
EDIT: Inserted a paragraph break and changed some words to clarify the setting. The original words were in my post here.
Last edited by Potteraholic on Mon Aug 08, 2011 9:03 pm; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Story #139
taught us that one yet
I vote for the paragraph break. It helps to move the story along.
Snape probably made this potion several times before he modified the instructions in Advanced Potion Making. Perhaps Slughorn suffers frome excessive singing as a result of this first attempt.
Thanks for the comment on my picture PAH. It was taken on Saturday at our Thai cooking class, hence the apron. I had taken a copy along to lend to one of the English teachers.
I vote for the paragraph break. It helps to move the story along.
Snape probably made this potion several times before he modified the instructions in Advanced Potion Making. Perhaps Slughorn suffers frome excessive singing as a result of this first attempt.
Thanks for the comment on my picture PAH. It was taken on Saturday at our Thai cooking class, hence the apron. I had taken a copy along to lend to one of the English teachers.
Verity Weasley- N.E.W.T.
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Story#139
. Do you want to drink
Sev has been looking gloomy today.
LOL, Verity!
I like the paragraph break, too. In that case, they can start making the potion at once. I'm in a hurry!
Sev has been looking gloomy today.
LOL, Verity!
I like the paragraph break, too. In that case, they can start making the potion at once. I'm in a hurry!
Julia H.- Prefect
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it? Are you feeling blue?
Okay, then! The paragraph break is in, and I changed some words to clarify the setting. Explanation here.
Volume X is up! Another great volume where we stretched out creative writing muscles: the Marauders when Lily and James were married (with Lily and Petunia as young mothers), a Molly-Arthur-Rita Skeeter love triangle(?), a Dean and Seamus adventure in Greece, The Dursleys in DH, Hermione working at the Ministry, The Weasley clan at Easter circa The Epilogue, a pre-Hogwarts Neville, and a Granger family outing. Volume X was also the first time Kip played Five Words!
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it? Are you feeling blue?
Okay, then! The paragraph break is in, and I changed some words to clarify the setting. Explanation here.
Volume X is up! Another great volume where we stretched out creative writing muscles: the Marauders when Lily and James were married (with Lily and Petunia as young mothers), a Molly-Arthur-Rita Skeeter love triangle(?), a Dean and Seamus adventure in Greece, The Dursleys in DH, Hermione working at the Ministry, The Weasley clan at Easter circa The Epilogue, a pre-Hogwarts Neville, and a Granger family outing. Volume X was also the first time Kip played Five Words!
Last edited by Potteraholic on Tue Aug 09, 2011 6:17 am; edited 1 time in total
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Story #139
"
"No," he laughed, "I don't
I must remember to read the Molly-Arthur-Rita love triangle one when I get the time. It sounds intriguing!
"No," he laughed, "I don't
- Spoiler:
- need it when you're with me...I was thinking, but could be something altogether different.
I must remember to read the Molly-Arthur-Rita love triangle one when I get the time. It sounds intriguing!
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need it. But I thought
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need it. But I thought
If they're going to start making the potion together, I reckon Sev needs to tell Lily outright, in no uncertain terms, what his plans are for it re: Slughorn. We are nearing 1100 words and it's time to get going with the main plot of this story. This does not need to be a 2,000 word story , esp. at the current pace it's being written.Julia H. wrote:I like the paragraph break, too. In that case, they can start making the potion at once. I'm in a hurry!
Potteraholic- Ravenclaw Prefect
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Story #139
I'd slip some to Slughorn
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Story #139
and try to persuade him
Verity Weasley- N.E.W.T.
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Story #139
to include me in the
Mona- Hufflepuff Prefect
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Story#139
Club. I think I deserve
Perhaps he feels it necessary to justify the idea.
Perhaps he feels it necessary to justify the idea.
Julia H.- Prefect
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Story #139
to be a member and
Yes, Lily might need a little bit of persuading that it is a harmless plan in order for her to go along with it.
Yes, Lily might need a little bit of persuading that it is a harmless plan in order for her to go along with it.
Verity Weasley- N.E.W.T.
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Story #139
Slughorn likes me already. The
Mona- Hufflepuff Prefect
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potion will just put him
It's been a while without a post, so I thought I'd add a hint just in case folks were stuck.
- Spoiler:
- in a really good mood...
It's been a while without a post, so I thought I'd add a hint just in case folks were stuck.
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